Infant Feeding - Massive Straw Men with Ambivalence & Gaslights

[Ineedacupofteadesperately]

I've felt for a long time that something is 'off' about the discussion in the media around infant feeding. Apart from anything else the fact that the alternative to a mother breastfeeding is automatically accepted to be formula rather than donor milk, and no-one seems to ever question this. Why? Throughout history the alternative was wet nursing, not feeding cows milk. We have successful blood donation - why have all the milk banks been destroyed, we used to have more? Why is no money put into this in a supposedly rich country?

Anyway, someone sent me this link and I found it thought provoking. I think the comparison of adult feeding habits very pertinent at the end, but I do think part of the problem is that there are vested interests very focused on this remaining seen as individual choice rather than individual decisions in a very stacked environment without proper investment to support women, which often means there is no real choice at all.

www.analyticalarmadillo.co.uk/2019/02/infant-feeding-massive-straw-men-with.html

I actually was the youngest and it was a bit weird! And good points bertie.

I was the youngest at mine and did subsequently feel out of place at times, but it wasn't anyone's fault, they were all nice to me and included me. It served its purpose as a support group for the first year or so, the others stayed in touch I gather, I didn't really. Found myself disappearing off their facebooks one by one. But it did what I needed it to do at the time.

This time around with DC2 my MN group has been much more active and supportive because the internet/social media has changed so much and if I was still in the UK I probably would have met up with them so the support group thing still stands.

I was just lucky I fit the typical NCT demographic I guess. I think I'd have felt awkward if I'd been the only young or single mum in the class for example

Went to the NHS classes with husband and it was wall to wall (hetero) couples. I remember thinking that if you didn't conform to that eg single mum - you'd have felt totally our on a limb on your own.

Didn't know if it was coincidence or if single mums already guessed and just didn't attend.

I was the youngest but not by that much, if I'd been 21 I'd have felt really out of place. Maybe there are specific classes or sessions for single mums that are more tailored to their needs.

They pay for donor milk here in Finland but it doesn't appear to have an impact on breastfeeding levels - they'd need to pay a lot more to make it worthwhile to feed your own baby formula while putting in the time and effort to pump to make a profit. The paying is just enough to acknowledge the time and effort put in to donate extra milk, but it does mean donor milk is quite readily available in hospitals, both of my full term babies got it while we were in the hospital. But it's not available outside of the hospital which is right, that's where the most need is and the supply needs to go there. Altruistic private donation is nice, I wish I had done that with my excess milk but it got too old before I decided by baby was never going to drink it, but it wouldn't be right for the health service to get involved with that as it's not for babies in desperate need for donor milk.