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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

And then they came for the heterosexual men

108 replies

EweSurname · 15/02/2019 04:40

I Asked My Crushes Why They Won't Sleep with Me

When a straight guy says he is not into me, nor other trans women, I feel butthurt–emotionally and, unfortunately, not physically.

broadly.vice.com/en_us/article/3kgvab/transgender-sex-chasers-cisgender-men

OP posts:
RedToothBrush · 16/02/2019 17:40

It took me working my way through much of the transwidows thread to finally get it intellectually. It's not about people just being, it's about fetish-driven transwomen doing, and doing what they do to women, particularly those who are close to them. There seems to be a great deal of barely suppressed rage involved. It is a very dark business.

Not a trans widow. But welcome to my world.

Apparently as my Mum told me, the person that my sibling most wanted acceptance from was guess who... This was after he tried to drive a stake in my relationship with my husband and being aggressive in how he wanted to pursue a relationship with my son.

It's an eye opener already. It's always been about sibling rivalry in some way. In the end, I guess they won in some ways as it destroyed my relationship with my parents but ultimately my husband and son were more important.

I read the trans widows stuff and think about how it's about dominating the family unit - whether it be wives, siblings, children or parents. It's about having to control that in someway and deal with long standing insecurities and inferiority complexs.

R0wantrees · 16/02/2019 18:18

re-posting shorter extract of important and relevent extended article, which is worth reading in full

by Hacsi Horváth whose personal and professional experience including 'detransitioning' is significant:
I am an adjunct Lecturer in the Department of Epidemiology and Biostatistics at the University of California, San Francisco (UCSF). I’m an expert in clinical epidemiology, particularly in systematic review methods, epidemiologic bias and evidence quality assessment. As a researcher at UCSF, I managed the Cochrane HIV/AIDS Group for over a decade and on several occasions served as a consultant to the World Health Organization (WHO) in their HIV guideline development processes.

For about 13 years, I also masqueraded “as a woman,” taking medical measures which suggest, shall we say, that I was completely committed to that lifestyle. Most men would have recoiled from this, but in my estrogen-drug-soaked stupor it seemed like a good idea. In 2013 I stopped taking estrogen for health reasons and very rapidly came back to my senses. I ceased all effort to convey the impression that I was a woman and carried on with life

Published by 4thWaveNow:
'The Theatre of the Body: A detransitioned epidemiologist examines suicidality, affirmation, and transgender identity'
(extract)
Heterosexual males (the vast majority of men with GD) have autogynephilia.
Homosexual males with GD enjoy “femininity” and mistakenly believe this means they are “trans” or even women.
Females with GD have internalized misogyny and/or internalized homophobia.
In my opinion—which is based upon extensive research, as well as my own 13-year-long experience in pretending to be a woman–GD is only superficially concerned with one’s sex. It’s more a disturbance of identity, of mistaking the signifier for the signified. Patients have whatever mental illnesses they may have, or that develop while in the ruminations and hypomanic states that typically precede “coming out as trans.” I propose that GD is a moody, brooding syndrome that accompanies these mental illnesses. People with GD have cultivated an idealized vision of themselves as the opposite sex. At a critical point of rumination, after the patient has sufficiently disparaged his or her actual life and idealized life as the opposite sex, he or she realizes that body parts of the opposite sex may be obtained through the services of doctors (Raymond 1979, Billings 1982). Actually transforming into the opposite sex starts to seem feasible. The self-conception “splits” in two, and idealization becomes identity. Having negated any value in their actual male or female presence in the world, and now feeling themselves to actually be the self-generated persona, patients perseveratively ask themselves, “what’s stopping me?” “Feasibility” seems to trigger the split. Here begins the acute phase of GD.

Patients become obsessed with “transition.” To the same extent that they can be energized by the belief that they are making “progress,” as their bodies morph via the hormone drugs and shop clerks address them by their preferred honorifics (i.e. Miss or Ma’am for the males, Sir for the females), they can also feel destroyed by any little delay or perceived setback—including being “misgendered” or identified by others as their actual sex. Nothing else matters but “transition.” (continues)

"I agree with the late French psychoanalyst Colette Chiland when she said: “Transsexuals stage everything in the theatre of the body, and nothing in that of the psyche” (Chiland 2003). It is true that persons in the driven, obsessed stages of gender dysphoria can seemingly think of nothing except transition. No-one dreams of asking them to slow down, to seek psychotherapy... " (continues)
4thwavenow.com/2018/12/19/the-theatre-of-the-body-a-detransitioned-epidemiologist-examines-suicidality-affirmation-and-transgender-identity/

NB 4thWaveNow are "a community of parents & others concerned about the medicalization of gender-atypical youth and rapid-onset gender dysphoria (ROGD)"

Hacsi Horváth was part of the panel at the recent Washington event,
"The Inequality of the Equality Act: Concerns from the Left"

www.heritage.org/event/the-inequality-the-equality-act-concerns-the-left

thread:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/3490776-Women-Stand-Up-in-Washington-D-C?pg=2

Oldermum156 · 17/02/2019 14:15

"I thirst for the boys who have only ever chased cis girls. It’s these guys who won’t fuck me. "

Translated: "I want what I can't have"

CircleofWillis · 17/02/2019 14:21

Also “I don’t want to be a member of any club that would accept people like me as a member”
Marx (Groucho not Karl)

Oldermum156 · 17/02/2019 14:23

As a transwidow still with my partner, I actually saw them reading this the other day so I recognized the article. This is them, exactly. They moan all the time about not being able to find a man who will see them as a woman and treat them like a woman. It is the game for them. The majority of TRAs are into forcing women to sleep with them but a minority, like the author and my partner, want men to see them as women. They have a fantasy about how women are treated by men and desperately want to be treated that way. The fact that no women are treated like this by men doesn't seem to ever dawn on them.

DonaldTwain · 17/02/2019 14:26

Quite a lot of that article didn’t make sense. Insofar as it did I found it, and the person who wrote it, distinctly unpleasant.
Perhaps people don’t want to sleep with you because you’re creepy? Just a thought

Oldermum156 · 17/02/2019 14:29

@ QuentinWinters

It's a pretty easy read once you translate it properly:
pre-op transwoman - man with intact penis
non-op transwoman - man with intact penis

IPokeBadgers · 17/02/2019 14:40

I read the article after it...the one about topping and bottoming. I now need to lie down as my head has exploded with the linguistic acrobatics if it all....

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