We argue every time I bring up feminism

[SnowyRobin]

Every time I bring it up.. argument!

He takes feminism as a personal insult.. how do I fix this?!

What does he object to?

Why is it yours to fix?

Dump him. He’s a prick.

Problem solved.

Seriously, if he is so sexist, and so unthinking and entitled and threatened, that the very mention of equality between the sexes makes him furious, then why would you want to stay with him?

Is "leave the bastard" a viable option for you, OP?

What is the relationship between you?

Is he your: Son? Boyfriend? Husband? Brother? Father? Grandfath

You can't fix him. If he's not prepared to listen and be willing to consider your point of view then it's not going to work long term (assuming this is a romantic partner).

Pressed enter too soon. He's my DP. I love him, but bringing up feminism always leaves him seething

I could never be with a man who believed feminism = man hating.

If you can leave him I think you should. If he has no respect for women by believing they shouldn't be equal to men, then he doesn't have any respect for you.

Sorry, I accidentally cut off a bit of my post, there

For "Grandfath", please read "Grandfather".

I’m female, just because we don’t go above and beyond on feminism is ok. You can find a balance with your partner, life is about being happy, no matter who you are :)

What on earth does he seethe about?

I agree with the other posters. If he does not accept and respect your reasonable opinions, then you're better off without him.

What do you mean by bringing up feminism?

Can you give some actual examples of conversations you've attempted to engage in?

I’m all for being pc

My Dad has this attitude. Pretty sure he hung about female dominated Facebook groups just to argue with them.

He did a lot of damage because he actually did treat me differently to my Male siblings, and because nobody challenged it I did think I was less, I had no confidence and no self esteem despite him having limited involvement (what with child raising being beneath men) and it's only in his death I've talked about it with other family.

My brother sometimes comes out with same stuff Dad is but difference is he listens and reads and learns and doesn't argue with me if I point out something is unfair. Like when he only asks his dd to do dishes and never his son, he now has son and him taking turns because he doesn't want to be the same shitty Dad ours was.

Someone who got angry and seething and doesn't think women should be equals is someone I wouldn't want to be with.

What is his problem? What does he seethe about? What does he understand by feminism? (A lot of men seem to think it's anti-men, and that The patriarchy=all men.)
If he seethes when you differentiate yourself from a doormat, you know what to do.

Sorry, I've had a few drinks. He's offended that I'm "attacking men". I'm really not! It's such a complex issue.

It's so difficult talking about these things with him because he goes on the defensive. It's hard to explain a lifetime of these issues to somebody who doesn't understand it.

His dad began ranting tonight about women voted before 1918 and how feminism forgets men.

Whenever I bring it up against them I'm called a 'dumb' or 'stupid bitch'. I'm just a bit drunk and angry about it all tbh

That's the thing about privilege, OP - he's not going to see things from your perspective but the worst thing (apart from the abusive way he talks to you) is the fact he doesn't care that he doesn't understand your perspective.

I guess it depends on whether you're happy sharing a life with someone who has such little regard for you and your feelings and opinions.

I know I wouldn't be.

Years ago I used to have a problem with framing my complaints. I used to say "Men..." and DH would go: "NAMALT..." It's much more productive to be specific about the behaviour you're complaining about and not to generalise about who does it...

I would be more interested in how he treats you day by day. A man can spout all the right things about a woman being equal but its his actions that really tell you whats in his heart. So if he is fair in all his dealings with you and women in his workplace etc l would ease up on the discussion and focus on my life.
If he is antiwoman in any way don't waste your breath arguing just forget about him as he is not good relationship material.

He's sees feminism as an attack on men. It's not! I have a lot of lovely male friends.

It's more "how dare you question men" sort of thing.

Tried to explain being groped at at a work Xmas do by three different people. He didn't understand the problem and said "I've had my bum pinched before but didn't care"

Why are you attacking men sort or thing. I give up

Doesn't help with the structural problems in the short term but will get you there in the long term, is my experience.

I frequently disagree with my dp without being called dumb or a stupid bitchl.

Why do you think you are?

I think he needs to understand that feminism isn't anti male.
It might be a better approach (if you have a daughter) to frame things in context of her. I think that helps men see it differently... before they grasp it is also about you.

Admittedly, you should have to do this, but it might help.
If he's got it in his head that a chat about feminism = a rant about men, then you're going to struggle.

Chances are he will have discussed feminism plenty of times without appreciating it, because it wasn't labelled as feminism, but the moment that term is used, he gets defensive. Maybe there is a crafty way to chat about a subject without him realising it? Not ideal, but if needs must?

Just read the groping post. If he thinks thats ok, there isn't much hope.

He's very much "a too good to clean the toilet sort of person". Has argued this for the past two hours (that he had cleaned the toilet 10 times in the past five years).

Me and his lovely mother were talking about old-fashioned sexist issues today. Him and his father get very angry at the mention of feminism