Can someone explain what "genderqueer" means?

[beenandgoneandbackagain]

I'm struggling to understand what people mean when they say they identify as "genderqueer".

Just about everything else I can think of in the various debates/discussions in the FWR board can be viewed objectively. e.g. a male who presents in a certain way, I can see how they are presenting, and accept that they may identify in a certain way.

We can subjectively see when something is sexually simulating / attractive to another person, e.g. their sexuality or what turns them on, e.g. BDSM or preferred "kink" or whatever they call it these days.

We can see "gender" in the way things are viewed as male/female by wider society, e.g. lipstick is seen as a female thing, football as a (mostly) male thing. I am in no way saying I agree with "gender" but I "get" what people mean when they use it.

But "queer"? I'm really struggling with that one, especially when combined with the word queer and used by a woman in a heterosexual relationship with a beardy-male. What subjective things are there to help me understand what the term means?

I know this isn't exactly the right board, but it's where the experts of mumsnet are.

In other words, the right to label others, and so put them into boxes, without being subject to a meaningful label themselves (because to fetter the freedoms of the genderqueer is literal violence).

I remember many a heated debated that ended in tears about whether goths had to die their hair black or if ginger was ok (never concluded)

Everyone knows that ginger is fine if you're a real Goth because Jane Morris.

So... they are critical of gender norms, then?

From my experience, there's little difference between GC feminists and non binaries...

From my experience, there's little difference between GC feminists and non binaries...

Except that they haven’t made the connection that they are based on myths and misconceptions about biology and that people with female biology are disproportionately disadvantaged by them. They’re almost there.

@Notevenmyrealname It is an important question if they are critical of gender norms - if so, it might do more to abolish them to just identify as you were born and make it clear you can be that sex and not have to comply with gender norms, thanks.

Agree with Errol. If the Scottish Gov have brain failure and decide to put non binary on the sex question on the census then As the question obviously is no longer about sex but how well you want to fit in to an imaginary gender stereotype I will tick non binary and encourage everyone I know to do the same to teach them the meaning of GIGO. If half Scotland including all the stroppy middle aged women are non binary it's "special" allure will soon fade

Genderqueer/nonbinary is essentially gender critical feminism.
Both hold the idea that people don't have to conform to a set way of being a particular gender.
Gender critical feminists think the sooner we can accept people have a range of interests and personalities the better.

Genderqueer and nonbinary people think not identifying with stereotypes makes them special and deserving in the place of the oppression Olympics.

From my experience, there's little difference between GC feminists and non binaries...

I used to believe that, too.

An enby describing, in gruesome detail on her public blog how she would like to murder me for daring to imply that there's little difference between her and me, disabused me of the notion.

Lesson learnt: Gender critical feminists want to liberate women.

Non-binaries want to throw other women to the wolves so that they themselves can be free.

It's a case of "You don't have to run very fast to escape the wolves, you only have to be faster than the other people in your group."
They need other women to be hobbled for their strategy to work.

Radical feminists are the ones who want to fight the wolves, or at least free other women so they have a fair chance at running.

The only thing we and enbies agree about is that we don't want to be eaten by the wolves.