Badley Fuckitt Welcomes Careful Drivers

[boatyardblues]

That's where I want to live right now. Home of the Bluestocking pub and the Shady Pines, the favoured retirement home of gin-swilling, cantankerous elderly gender crit feminists. It's like that village in the Dales which dodged the bubonic plague and is a haven from PoMo fuckwittery. Anyone else in?

Special guest man hour, once a day.
Ricky Gervais maybe.

Surely Graham Linehan first?

Surely Graham Linehan first?

Or Jonny Best, he's very talented too?

Signing up for Bowl's science lectures too.

Graham Lineham and Johnny Best
They would be most welcome.
David TC Davies as well.

Rowan
You can have the master password for the library database, as you have excellent talent for information retrieval.

WrathofbubonicKlop, thank you am honoured.
Its a bit hit and miss though.
Passwords not so good.
There may be others better trusted!

I must confess, my balaclavas are a bit hazardous. I'm never really sure where to put the face hole so vision and breathing is a bonus, hearing is a no-no and tripping is standard.

Three that made me splutter tea all over my keyboard. Smashing post.

What about pink pussy hat balaclavas? As long as they aren't itchy.

Packing my suitcase and pondering my transferable skills. I'll think about it overnight.

Upstart
Pink pussy hat balaclavas

That would look very strange.
There's a danger one might look like a knob

Very original though.

i’ll happily woman the late night cafe because I am a crap sleeper.

I also offer enthusiastic but mostly untrained hair cutting.. the logical conclusion of my deep appreciation of a really sharp pair of scissors.

In the daytime i’ll keep the stationer’s with a really satisfying stock of lined and squared notebooks, super sharpened pencils and very smooth writing fountain pens that don’t leak.

I’ll have card, scalpels and rubber mats and a big table for anyone who wants to help make stencils for the banners or card cut-outs for gender-critical postcard campaigns. I can see a pop up line might be impactful.

I might go modern and instal a custom sticker-printing and personalised label setup in the back for anyone who’s heading back into town or somewhere where a little stash of stickers might be useful..

Chatty
Really sharp scissors, sharpened pencils and a scalpel
You are very well equipped, you could join the perimeter patrol.

This thread has made me laugh so much.
Upstart, a pink pussy balaclava is something I want to make now
Wrath, There's a danger one might look like a knob
Chatty, pop-up is inspired and I could join you at the hairdressers. In the absence of clippers I can do a bowl cut or, if you're really unlucky, plate. When I've occasionally frequently given the DS's a bad haircut I just tell them they're trendsetters cos I'm sure it's fashionable somewhere.

Ooh ooh very happy with the thought of a wool studio.
I just realised I have another useful talent which is plumbing (DIY obvs but I could train up). Love a bit of drain unblocking

I'm sure you will all be pleased to hear that I started steeping the currants/raisins in rum for the Winter solistice Stollen (there'll be Almond Stollen for the inevitable dried fruit rejecters) for the party at the allotments. Party will start at sundown on the 21st at the allotment fire pit, if you could all put that into your diaries, that'd be grand.

I can knit Nifflers, they might be good for the gift shop. We could put little suffragette rosettes on them.

I like the idea of marking the solstice.

I’m up for being the DJ at the party- any requests let me know 💃
I have a projector for a film soc at the memorial hall. Sense and Sensibility with Emma Thompson will be first ( I’ll be serving a cream tea too just because I need the flimsiest of excuses to have one).

QuentinWinters given the potentially remote, rural nature of Badley Fuckitt I think we'll be needing someone who is a dab hand with a septic tank.

Can we alternate Jenni Murray and Jane Garvey? Or will Jane be the t annoy for the patrol asking questions of would be intruders?

The enthusiasm for the patrol is interesting.
Nice to know we have something good and that it needs protecting.

Film Soc should definitely screen Thelma and Louise.

I’ll definitely work on a village scene. It’ll keep me occupied the next time I end up in twitter jail.

Working on my handywoman skills.

Got toolbox, have worked out how to drill holes for Rawlplugs to screw stuff to walls.

Working on shelves next.

Yay Sandy! That would be amazing.

Sandy
How about a mural?
If you could work on the outline, lots of us would enjoy colouring in.