I don't often post, and I feel very reticent posting now, but reading through this thread I'm finding myself being increasingly alienated as to what sort of feminist I am.
Ester's 20. Been brought up into masculine gender stereotyping, feels it's wrong and is in the process of transitioning. Along the way Ester got caught up in what is often referred to here as a "cult" and went along with and adopted all the terminology that made them believe they belonged in that cult. The militant-trans-club exist in a bubble, filtering out other views, twitter and facebook blocks, suspensions. Universities and other woke organisations go out of their way to demonstrate they are in the right by withdrawing women's spaces and silencing/no-platforming debates.
I find it very sad that trans people truly believe that people like me hate them just because they are trans. The cult ensures that voices like mine don't get through - it hides behind the one thing it will never be able to attain. Transwomen are transwomen. I can live with transwomen as a term. But not women. They will never be women. Different. So long as we won't capitulate to this fantasy, the cult hides behind "no debate" as their focus. That and the false statistics, the violence, and when no actual violence can be evidenced, the literal violence. It's akin to "every time a child says, 'I don't believe in fairies,' there is a fairy somewhere that falls down dead".
Maybe Ester's cult bubble has burst. Maybe not. Only Ester knows whether they are genuine in their contrition or whether it's a stunt.
But I find the taking apart of Ester's choice of language unsettling. I have young grandchildren, and I often find myself having to re-explain language I have used as I realise what I have actually said is not what I meant. I'm learning a great deal, including to moderate what I say especially when my patience is being tested by a two year old who is merely behaving like a two year old.
If we want genuine trans people to believe that we don't hate them and we accept them on our terms, not on their demands, then I think rubbishing Ester's blog is counter-productive. We've always said dialogue is needed and we need the trans community to stand up and be counted and here we have someone who for whatever reason has done so and it gets thrown back in their face. If Ester is genuine they need encouragement or the cult will point the finger back at us and say see ..... we said they hated you just because you're trans.
From many of the comments here I can hear my parents saying to the teenage me "you're a fool, and don't come running back when it all goes wrong", but for the time being, I'm giving Ester the benefit of the doubt but eyeing them with distrust. Trust needs to be earned and in my opinion Ester's blog although far from perfect is a step in the right direction. It's giving me hope that someone is listening and maybe there are others like Ester who haven't yet had the courage to speak up but they're out there and they will, given the chance.