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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

I was one of the transactivists on the channel 4 documentary, I regret what I did — this is why

628 replies

OnTheDarkSideOfTheSpoon · 25/11/2018 09:34

medium.com/@Betsulimo/i-was-one-of-the-transactivists-on-the-channel-4-documentary-i-regret-what-i-did-this-is-why-7e12350ab6d3

Someone who was filmed trying to stop the “we need to talk” session now thinks they were wrong for attempting to shut down debate and realises that they were intimidating women

OP posts:
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BlytheSpiritsSpirit · 25/11/2018 10:37

Phase 2 of #nodebate rolling out.

kesstrel · 25/11/2018 10:38

Wow. If that piece was honest (a big if, I know), it's a psychologically fascinating insight into the mind of a young indoctrinated cult member struggling with cognitive dissonance, and how to reconcile the competing narratives of "I'm a good (female) person" and "I did something shockingly (male) violent and aggressive".

Bloomcounty · 25/11/2018 10:38

It took Esther 7 months to work out that the tiny woman cowering in a stairwell was petrified

Exactly my point. This "essay" is just an attempt at damage control. As a PP said above - We See You. We see what you're doing. One thing that I must thank transwomen for, is that I'm no longer so quick to forgive, no longer so quick to say "oh it's okay, I know you didn't mean it" and no longer so quick to trot back to the kitchen.

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 25/11/2018 10:38

I hope that they also realise that this is male patterned behaviour.

sackrifice · 25/11/2018 10:39

Phase 2 of #nodebate rolling out.

It literally is 'we can't stop them so we will attend their meetings and destroy their social space'. Just like in the guidance that Jess Bradley has indicated in the T*RF talks recently held.

kesstrel · 25/11/2018 10:40

*Binglebong" I wondered about that, too. Smile

FlippinFumin · 25/11/2018 10:41

I am torn on this. I am absolutely of the opinion they only apologised because they looked like the complete male thug they don't want to be. But I can also see that they see that. They saw they looked like a thuggish bloke and it was hard for them to handle, as they now see themselves as a woman. Perhaps I just want to see the good in them.

But as an aside, if they had let off a smoke bomb, and I had been in that room, it could have killed me. I suffer from COPD, and any irritant in a room which I could not escape from, well, perhaps this is something you TRAs reading could take on board, Smoke bombs are not to be trifled with, in some circumstances they can be lethal. You do not know the health concerns of anyone in that room. Grow the fuck up.

Xenia · 25/11/2018 10:42

It looks like this person is a young student. People that age wheher male or female do all sorts as they are not quite mature. I hesitate to say men tend to be about 2 years behind girls at growing up in their teens but it's true a lot of the time and then men catch up in their 20s and it gets fairly even. It must be even harder if you are trans. That does not mean you can risk lives with smoke bombs that could even as stated above cause death and it is not sensible to stop people discussing issues.

I tihnk we would need more evidence to show someone was asked to leave presumably a shared student house because they transitioned as most students are more than happy to share with their friends whether male or female but if that did happen and it weren't a residential place segregated by gender then that sounds wrong and I'm sorry.

I would just concentrate on getting high degree results and pursuing a good career and if not already done full gender transition under current law if you are sure.

LangCleg · 25/11/2018 10:42

It literally is 'we can't stop them so we will attend their meetings and destroy their social space'.

It's exactly that and I really recommend that everyone doesn't allow their female socialisation make them fall for it.

pancaketosser · 25/11/2018 10:43

There seems to be little realisation that it is the intimidation that led us to this point.

After an event where "cis people" were "given an opportunity" (so, allowed) to ask questions, the author's trans friends were actually surprised that gasp! when you don't try and intimidate women they might actually want to discuss things with you.

Also, thanks to the PP that posted the rule of mysogyny, I was thinking about that!

pancaketosser · 25/11/2018 10:43

Should have pressed preview.

EverardDigby · 25/11/2018 10:47

But as an aside, if they had let off a smoke bomb, and I had been in that room, it could have killed me

Yes I too have a health condition that it could have put me in serious danger and possibly killed me too.

PositivelyPERF · 25/11/2018 10:53

One thing that I must thank transwomen for, is that I'm no longer so quick to forgive, no longer so quick to say "oh it's okay, I know you didn't mean it" and no longer so quick to trot back to the kitchen.

That had been a completely unexpected side effect to the bullying attitude of the TRAs and their brainwashed woke crowd. Until I peaked, I was always concerned about being ‘nice’, not offending, people pleasing, behaving. Now I say NO and stuck to it, don’t tell lies in case I ‘hurt’ someone’s feelings at the expense of my own. It’s liberating. It must be what it feels like to grow up with male socialisation. Oh dear, does that mean I’m a transman? 😉

groundcontroltomontydon · 25/11/2018 10:59

Why do I have in my head the 'Neil, Neil, orange peel!' scene from the Young Ones with Rik wringing his hands in faux remorse Hmm

PurpleOva · 25/11/2018 11:04

I'd love for this to be genuine contrition and a move forward to open debate.

But, the fact that they are basically saying "sorry for how I tried to silence you last time, I'll try and silence you differently next time" makes me doubt the authenticity.

I think many of us have been burnt by the narcissistic cycle of abuse and are wary of being burnt again.

HandsOffMyRights · 25/11/2018 11:04

I can't help but be cynical. Not keen on some of the tone/language either.

Smoke bomb info interesting though.

arranfan · 25/11/2018 11:05

Can they not see how dangerous that could be and how it could potentially cause breathing problems and also panic. A panicked reaction when all the exits are blocked by your group may have ended very badly.

But as an aside, if they had let off a smoke bomb, and I had been in that room, it could have killed me. I suffer from COPD,...Smoke bombs are not to be trifled with, in some circumstances they can be lethal.

Both of these. In an emergent situation like that, it's not clear that it's a smoke bomb rather than a fire or a threat of a device. It's not reasonable to expect civilians to know the difference or to be so accustomed to such things that we know what the best course of action is.

I just googled what to do if someone throws a smoke bomb and there was no advice.

Pages and pages of how to make smoke bombs (I'd no idea they'd become such a staple of football matches in some areas). And even some rather sweet advice on how to make them without damaging your pans and other kitchen items. And earnest discussion about making them non-coloured because even organic food dyes aren't good for your eyes if you get the air dispersal right rather than just have the dye burn up with the fuse. Hmm

DaedricLordSlayer · 25/11/2018 11:06

which documentary was this?

UpstartCrow · 25/11/2018 11:06

I came here to say what FlippinFumin has already said - smoke bombs kill people who have compromised breathing, or people who cannot leave quickly.

The BNP used to let off mace/pepper spray in enclosed spaces. Its a tactic used by Fascists who don't care about the consequences or actively want to cause harm.

sackrifice · 25/11/2018 11:08

Like when they smoke bombed the Metro offices...and were online laughing about how the staff were panicking about it as it was just a smoke bomb.

As if that is totally normal behaviour.

heresyandwitchcraft · 25/11/2018 11:12

I agree with previous posters who said this whole article is about the author trying to look better. I don't think they've actually really had a change of heart, just been caught out and realized they look bad.

arranfan · 25/11/2018 11:12

which documentary was this?

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/3430608-Stella-OMalley-Trans-Kids-Its-Time-To-Talk

Mummyoflittledragon · 25/11/2018 11:14

If Esther really believed this the language would be different. They still believe in their superiority over me.

ChickenonaMug · 25/11/2018 11:14

Whilst I can see that this article could be about damage limitation. How really very erm... silly would you have to be to include in it the fact that you and your group were attempting to storm a room in order to smoke bomb it. The result of which could have been a massive impact on someone' health, potentially their life and also cause panic. I wonder how long the article will stay up considering what they are admitting to.

candidpeel · 25/11/2018 11:17

Esther Betts is the person who asks the two extended questions the Heather B-E in Bristol last week (from about 30mins on the video)

It does seem like a genuine attempt to engage in dialogue.

Https:twitter.com/brunskellevans/status/1066641006886641666?s=19

Heather B-E in her tweet this morning says that Esther said sorry to her in person about how Esther acted at the Jam Jar, and they hugged.

It also looks like Esther is part of the Free Speech Society that hosted the Heather B-E talk. I guess they were surprised to see one of their members masked and violently opposing free speech! www.facebook.com/groups/1560775530901215/permalink/2057842744527822/

It is good, I think, that this young person is exploring and rethinking their position. That's what university should be for.

Their online apology is grudging and ungracious but its a start.

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