Please stop, these boards are destroying my health

[Stoptheworldplease2018]

Dear Feminists

I first came on to mumsnet because I was physically assaulted by a "transgender" activist. I got all the "usual" responses and was informed of a multitude of different acronyms, words and descriptors I had never come across. The rabbit hole went so very very deep. Two years on, the feminists boards are still dominated by the "trans" agenda and as I have severe PTSD I find it difficult not to read them but when I do I become unwell again. It is like an itch that will not go away. I want to scratch it but know I shouldn't. Please please consider how these boards negatively impact the mental health of others. It is so disturbing to read so many threads about horrific incidents involving sexual abuse, physical assaults etc. I can here you yelling - well just don't read them - I really do not want to but like I say it is like the itch that will not go away. We all know every argument, every discussion point, every concern, can you not just put such discussions elsewhere for example in feminist theory where you could devise a theory to meet the challenges? I am so very very tired and cannot deal with the trauma anymore. Thank you for reading.....

Just hide all the boards in your options - that way you won't see them in active convos and will only get caught by the odd one usually flagged in the title. Silencing of women on here is not going to happen and nor should it.

I’m sorry to hear you’re suffering, you sound like you’re in quite a vulnerable state

I’m confused though about how just changing the location of those threads to a different topic will make them go away though? If I were you I’d seek out ways to block the forums altogether if you really cannot control your impulse to view triggering material - Internet child safety settings etc, or an app?

Unfortunately for you discussions around trans activism etc are quite pertinent at the moment and I don’t see them going away. If your MH is suffering have you reached out to any support networks? Hope you feel better soon

Hide the board.
I will echo what Ozzy said, you cannot demand the silencing of women.

I am not "demanding" anything, I am asking that consideration be given to survivors of physical assaults.

Yes Vanilla I am in a very vulnerable state but have been discharged from mental health services as they buy into the sodding agenda and tried to convince me that people can change sex - not exactly helpful

So...Hide all the feminism boards and you'll only encounter the odd thread in Chat or AIBU which you then choose not to open - if MN is triggering then NM probably is safer for you...but if I have understood correctly you want to shut down the very women who are actively fighting for you not to be triggered in the future?

Just to add I did also write about not silencing women but I thought the OP is just in a sensitive place; I’m not in any way agreeing that coverage and clarity shouldn’t be given to the subject

OzzyMadBat - do you have any idea how aggressive your post appears? I am in tears again, thanks.

I know it’s frightening OP and I know that the more you read into it the more scary it gets - I’m a staunch labour supporter and I’m now having to reconsider my entire political alinement because it doesn’t seem to have room for women’s voices - which is terrifying as I’m so left wing in every other aspect.

I really think you need a break from this subject, you need some support too, but I don’t think focusing on the subject of TRA would be helpful for you. You need to frame your discussion in a way that focuses on your and your healing rather than the triggering subject of your attackers identity

and at one stage I did hide all the boards myself - it cuts out an awful lot - but then I became more of a critical thinker. I do feel for you but you need to take time away from the forum if it is causing distress. You cannot ask people to only post in one section - that's infringing on their right to post what they want where they want.

So sorry to hear about your assault, especially with it being brought back to the surface repeatedly

I don't think you'll have much success persuading people to not discuss the topic here afraid, although it's understandable that you'd want that. The discussions come up constantly because a new person who's only just catching up wants to have the conversation so starts it over again rather than reading through old threads. I guess it's not unreasonable really, as tedious as it might be (and traumatic for you).

Would it be helpful to block the feminist chat completely (so remove the temptation to read) and stick to some of the lighter areas of mumsnet?

I hope you are getting some decent support in real life.

Frightening does not even begin to cover it. I feel like I am going insane and no-one wants to help because the magic word "trans" means that I am somehow in the wrong and to blame for not kow towing to the lies.

Cults mess with people.

What's bringing you joy now, what brought you joy in the past?

Look, OP, I am sorry - you have obviously read something in the here and now that's upset you. I can offer a virtual hug and a because it's 4am and your anguish is palpable so I hate that I have made it worse for you but it's not tenable what you are asking or sustainable whereas changing your settings is. I can talk you through it if you like.

I have tried that SleepWarrior but when I look at threads "I'm on" the subjects are there so it is difficult to escape it. I really do not want to "shut down" conversation - thats actually the last thing - I just do not know how to handle it when every door is closed in terms of support. There is no "official" organisation within the mental health services that supports people who are critical of the entire ideology.

Thanks for the coffee and cake Ozzy, it is also 4am here I should be asleep but that evades me most nights as I wake up shaking

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/site_stuff/1248206-How-to-hide-certain-topics

Trust me, it works. Please try it.
Sorry for sounding brusque - 4am insomnia, lack of sleep, aspie kid, business mode. Hug. x

Pouring milk, I am trying all manner of things to try to cope, Remembering happy times, walking, reading, swimming etc. I am no longer able to work so do not have a "routine". It feels I have lost my purpose and the trauma is the last thing I think of at night and the first thing in the morning. It is a living hell.

What purpose do you want? You can choose so many things.

PouringMilk A reason to get up in the morning, a reason to breathe in and out. Some days I cannot even leave the house the fear is so strong.

www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/abuse/all-types-of-abuse/#.W9KGdpMzbtQ

There are two 24 hour phone lines here - The counsellors should have been trained to listen rather than judge and should be objective irrespective of their allegiances.

Thank you Ozzy, you would not believe how many organisations I have been to for support and have been turned away because it is to do with "trans", Mind is one of the organisations that refused to take me on.

Oh my gosh, if it’s that bad turn off your device. Clearly these things are making your mental health worse.
There no way we can say sorry we won’t say anything here in case you get upset. And if you choose to get upset because of our responses back to you post then again there’s nothing we can do. This is an online forum and it’s seen all around the world. Take people’s advice and block or switch off. Only you can control you. Sleep well.

The worst refusal I have had was from a womans mental health centre, they told me they were not "qualified" to deal with a "complex" case. It is just not good enough. I am not the only one in the UK that is struggling with trauma because of this insidious agenda yet there are no one to one support groups, only an online "discussion" group that is just as traumatic as the threads on here. It is a no win situation until there is a significant policy change more and more people will be harmed as I was and will have nowhere to turn