Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Playground sex assaults ‘are becoming an epidemic’

92 replies

SanctimoniousMorph · 12/08/2018 19:44

www.thetimes.co.uk/edition/news/playground-sex-assaults-are-becoming-an-epidemic-wcxh63tll

OP posts:
crocsaretoocoolforschool · 12/08/2018 19:46

And being excused with 'boys will be boys' or 'it's banter'

Wanderabout · 12/08/2018 19:49

She said that the “misogyny and dehumanising” nature of online pornography had made teenage boys think that making girls cry was “part of foreplay”

And yet Facebook has shut down a group about not dating blokes who use porn. But keeps nasty violent porn up no problem

UpstartCrow · 12/08/2018 19:50

How can any teacher think it's acceptable to make a girl sit next to the boy who raped her? Would a school make a child sit next to their bully?

PyeWackets · 12/08/2018 19:50

...but yeh, apparently being a feminist is all about being sex positive, fuck that. Women and girls matter, they need more privacy, not less.

AncientLights · 12/08/2018 19:57

There's one comment posted, which would be mine also: why is the schoolboy rapist back in class and not in a YOI?

Absofrigginlootly · 12/08/2018 20:05

I can’t access.... can anyone copy and paste?? Pretty please Cake

crocsaretoocoolforschool · 12/08/2018 20:19

upstart unfortunately in some cases yes -especially if it's a boy bullying a girl and it's sexual comments -which means that the boy can routinely grope the girl and the girl will be told off for holding a grudge and exaggerating

I may or may not be presenting an isolated case here

PinkyU · 12/08/2018 21:09

This is eye openingly terrifying. Rapes - every day in British schools! I honestly am speechless.

ScattyCharly · 12/08/2018 21:12

Paywall there unfortunately.

SanctimoniousMorph · 12/08/2018 21:20

Article text:

Schoolboy rapists think that their victims’ tears are a normal part of sex, the founder of the Everyday Sexism campaign said as she warned of a sexual assault epidemic in Britain’s playgrounds.

Laura Bates said that across the country schoolgirl rape victims were being put back into classrooms with their attackers because schools did not receive guidance telling them this should not be done.

Ms Bates told the Edinburgh International Book Festival that a rape a day in term time was being carried out in British schools.

She said that the “misogyny and dehumanising” nature of online pornography had made teenage boys think that making girls cry was “part of foreplay” and that the continuing absence of sex and relationship lessons in schools meant there was no corrective to the impact of pornography.

“I went to school recently where they had a rape case involving a 14-year-old boy and a teacher had said to him “why didn’t you stop when she was crying” and he looked straight back at her quite bewildered and said “because it is normal for girls to cry during sex”.

“I go into schools and talk to children around that age all that time who think that crying is part of foreplay because they have seen so much online porn that normalises violence and treating women in a way that is incredibly misogynistic and dehumanising.”

According to research, 5,500 sexual offences, including 600 rapes, were reported to police as having taken place in UK schools in the three years to July 2015.

The government has pledged to produce guidelines for schools to prevent children being forced to share classes with pupils who have raped or sexually assaulted them and consulting on proposals that all state schools should be required to teach relationship and sex education.

Ms Bates, whose Everyday Sexism project brought pressure to bear on the government to make the lessons compulsory, said the proposals were “fraught with potential pitfalls.

“It remains to be seen what the curriculum will look like, what the opt-outs will look like, whether it will include technology,” she said. “At the moment guidance is non—existent because the last guidance was written 20 years so there are all these people experiencing online porn and sexting and there is absolutely no advice at all.”

She added that whereas some schools did teach sex education, often it was given to older teenagers when it should be given to younger children.

OP posts:
bd67th · 12/08/2018 22:17

We can't turn off the internet, but we could do this:

  1. As an emergency measure to protect girls whilst we sort this mess out, the immediate conversion of all schools to single-sex. I do mean all: I know from personal experience that primary boys will grope. I don't care how expensive or inconvenient this is: 200 girls per year are being raped by boys at school and countless more sexually-assaulted, it's worth it to protect them.
  2. Mandatory age-appropriate consent and healthy relationship education for all children from reception to sixth form. No institutional nor parental opt-outs permitted, for any reason.
  3. The definition of child abuse to be extended to include parents who permit, through intent or through negligence, their children to watch pornography, including by allowing children to use the internet unsupervised.
IamEarthymama · 12/08/2018 22:20

Bd67th exactly!

bd67th · 12/08/2018 22:51

According to research, 5,500 sexual offences, including 600 rapes, were reported to police as having taken place in UK schools in the three years to July 2015.

IIRC nine in ten rapes go unreported to the police, so we could be looking at 2000 rapes per year and 19,000ish sexual assaults in total per year. At school. By boys against their classmates.

Namechangedtotellmystory · 12/08/2018 23:12

I have been sat here for ages wondering whether I should post this or not. I have briefly told this before IRL to a close friend, but left out a lot of detail.

Please do not read if you are sensitive to triggers regarding this issue.

My first sexual encounter was being bundled under a staircase at school by two boys and groped aggressively. They were the same age as me (14), but much stronger (as male teenagers generally are). The one boy looked into my eyes as he assaulted me and felt my sanitary pad. I had only been having periods for a few months and was already insecure about them. A (male) teacher walked by and told us to 'break it up guys'. I felt as though I had been accused of being 'promiscuous'. I wish that teacher had told us off so I could report them and cause a fuss. For years afterwards I worried that teachers knew about the incident and whether they had formed an opinion about my 'behaviour'. I had to share pretty much every lesson with the one boy for three more years and during that time he started to date my best friend. It shaped my teenage years and was the source of anxiety for many adult years too.

This definitely was a case of 'boys will be boys' or even 'girls will be girls'.

I sadly agree with @bd67th

I have much more to say on this issue, but I am sure that someone will come along to say it more eloquently than me.

thebewilderness · 12/08/2018 23:23

publications.parliament.uk/pa/cm201617/cmselect/cmwomeq/91/91.pdf

They know. They just don't care.

womanspeaking · 12/08/2018 23:40

Namechanged
That's an awful story. I am so sorry that it happened and that there was no one for you to tell. Flowers

WrongOnTheInternet · 12/08/2018 23:48

Call me naive, but I don't quite believe that 14 year olds could buy the idea that it's normal for girls to cry during sex and that that's fine. They've had years of experience of people crying = people in pain by that point, how can it be overridden by a couple of years of porn? That isn't 'it's normal for girls to cry', that's very deliberate sadism.

Similarly why in hell do school teachers, supposedly intelligent people who are supposedly highly vetted, need 'rules' or 'guidelines' to tell them not to put known rape victims in the same class as their known rapists?

I'm definitely beginning to agree that all teenagers need single sex education. Either that or the whole concept of school needs to be looked at.

FissionChips · 13/08/2018 00:00

I’m gobsmacked by this. I can’t even begin to articulate my horror.

It’s made my mind up that DD will be going to a single sex school though.

Those poor children.

Ereshkigal · 13/08/2018 00:15

Similarly why in hell do school teachers, supposedly intelligent people who are supposedly highly vetted, need 'rules' or 'guidelines' to tell them not to put known rape victims in the same class as their known rapists?

YY. Major problem here.

ijustwannadance · 13/08/2018 00:31

And they wonder why we want our girls to continue to be allowed SEX segregated spaces.
Who in their right fucking mind makes a rape victim share a classroom with her rapist!!!!!!! Why aren't the boys being punished?

LangCleg · 13/08/2018 08:37

Flowers for Namechangedtotellmystory and all the other girls this has happened to.

borntobequiet · 13/08/2018 09:15

I noticed sometime in the early 2000s, possibly about 2005? how teenagers’ behaviour in breaks/lunchtimes in school was changing - lots of hugging and kissing, sometimes very exaggerated/sexualised, mixed and same sex. (Boys who would have previously been mortified at being described as gay happily saying “ but he’s my bum chum miss”.). Lots of sex jokes and sex talk, not in the least private.
I mentioned this a few times to SLT and suggested we return to the “no touching” rule of the past but they didn’t seem to see the problem...gave up in the end.

Alicethroughtheblackmirror · 13/08/2018 10:40

This is horrific.

I used to get a lot of snide comments about sending dd to all girls school. I feel vindicated and she is definitely happier.

And some TV doctors think we should show porn in school...

FermatsTheorem · 13/08/2018 11:15

It's insane - the idea that anyone could think it was appropriate to put a boy who had sexually assaulted a girl back into the same classroom as that girl.

I'm just bricking it about trying to steer DS through puberty against the background of this sewage-filled tide of women-hating propaganda.

Swipe left for the next trending thread