Playground sex assaults ‘are becoming an epidemic’

[SanctimoniousMorph]

www.thetimes.co.uk/edition/news/playground-sex-assaults-are-becoming-an-epidemic-wcxh63tll

Cannot belive that even on a thread about female children being raped in schools that people are suggesting girls should keep being put in the path of physical harm just so boys don’t suffer.

I didn’t remotely say that. My posts are much more nuanced than that if you read them properly. I said I was absolutely not prepared to throw my DD under a bus for the sake of the boys development. I will consider single sex education when the time comes.

But I do also think that separating the sexes doesn’t help the boys learn how to interact appropriately with females.

Obviously the solution is not ideally to keep boys and girls away from each other but to tackle this rape/porn culture to begin with.

But until that is done then of course girls shouldn’t just be expected to put up with it.

For the rest of what I said I can only tell my own lives experience. What I personally observed was true. For the schools and unis I went to and the people I met.

Neither am I saying that girls should be put in harms way!
I would be beyond livid if my boys behaved like this, and tell them that.
Name the behaviour and tell them it is wrong.
I think we should be working much harder to stop it across the board, but separating the sexes forever doesn’t work.
Of course girls and boys should have their own space for changing, and I am not in favour of self ID and think that whilst their should be gender neutral spaces for those that require it should not be at the expense of girls’ safety and need for privacy.
We need to educate adults and children alike.
Women shouldn’t have to be separated completely to be safe though, what sort of a society is that? What message does that send? It’s burka mentality

As someone who went to a girls school I would question the assertion that girls who go to single sex schools love "misogynistic attention".

If anything we were quicker to tell them to FUCK OFF as we hadn't been ground down over years of it in school.

I would second the comment about why are the boys who have raped not in the criminal justice system?

Not saying they should be banged up age 14 but surely equally there should be multiple agencies involved, they should be nowhere near their victim (not even same school) and what about safeguarding other girls. Don't they have young offender institutes? We are continually told that rape is one of the "worst crimes there is" and ruins lives - the evidence does not seem to support this in the slightest. Here we see that it is a trivial thing that everyone should forget about immediately and carry on as if it never happened.

Nothing of course I’m not saying it’s 100% universally true. I’m just saying that it was for the people I knew back then.

I think that applies to most things with teenagers though doesn’t it? If you overly cosset them and deny them access to “temptations” (sex/relationships, alcohol, freedom, junk food, whatever) that when they are suddenly released into the world as adults they have a harder time regulating themselves and can easily “go off the rails” compared to teenagers who had age-appropriate access to these things

There was a girl guides report into this as well which made shocking reading.

The sex based differences they alluded to in that (boys sexually assaulting girls) is rendered nul and void though with their new idea that there is no such thing as sex only gender and gender is whatever you say it is. So, actually the situaiton in schools is that some children are sexually assaulting some other children and no more info available than that.

Why do you think children who go to single sex schools are "cosseted" and denied access to things like sex, relationships, alcohol, freedom?

I don’t. I was talking in a broader sense.

But for teenagers (especially in rural communities where I grew up) school formed a huge part of their solicitation with the opposite sex.

For lots of the girls locally unless you had a brother who had friends round your house, going to an all girls school meant you didn’t have daily and regular interactions with boys.

I knew many girls from the girls school who seemed naive and “desperate” around boys.

The local boys and girls grammar schools were mixed together in the sixth form. Some of my friends from our mixed comprehensive went there for 6th form and all commented how they all seemed more boy/girl/sex obsessed because they’d been kept apart somewhat for the previous 5 years of adolescence.

This was reflected in the young adults I mixed with at university too.

It’s just my personal experience.

Ah well "rural" might be a clue there.

I grew up in NW London.

And yet the DfE are apparently baffled by the rise in home education DD has been HE from the offset, I’m praying she doesn’t decide she wants to go to school as she gets older.

Yes maybe it’s the rural aspect that is the difference. Students used to travel up to an hour on the school bus to attend.

And like a PP said upthread, a lot of he privately educated students I met at uni had attended single sex boarding schools

My children are all secondary school aged. I suspect that the number of actual assaults will be far worse than reported. There was a programme last year about sexual assault in schools and it was highlighted that this happens at primary schools too and frighteningly there is no requirement for schools to record sexual incidents unlike racist ones.

Just had a google it's watchable here

www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b098tgsl

Ah I don't know much about boarding schools. Did meet one girl who went to one at uni but she was a lesbian so not so much into the whole boys side of thngs. She was also very sensible and grown up and very nice and I ought to try and get in touch with her TBH!

raining100% it should be compulsory to report incidents of sex assault / bullying of a sexual nature etc etc.

I am so glad this is being talked about. Laura Bates deserves a medal.

Much stricter controls / an outright ban on commercialised pornography will be a necessary part of any solution

school formed a huge part of their solicitation with the opposite sex.

Geez what a typo! should be socialisation

Bloody autocorrect

Do we know that the rates of sexual assaults in schools have actually gone up?

I think these sorts of assaults have always gone on. I don't think porn creates sexual predetors, I think it just makes them more creative. Boys have always pressured and coerced girls into sex acts, the difference now is they pressure them into anal and photos. I'm not trying to minimise the issue, just saying this is an old problem in a new disguise.

Also in regards to boys staying in the same class as their victims. Adult women are not believed and not able to get convictions against their rapists, do we really think teenage girls will be. The boy will only be removed from the school and punished if he is successfully prosecuted. I wouldn't be suprised if the schools try and discourage parents from involving the police to save their reputations.

3) The definition of child abuse to be extended to include parents who permit, through intent or through negligence, their children to watch pornography, including by allowing children to use the internet unsupervised.

Still catching up on the thread, but I want to pick up on this comment ^. When DS1 started high school, we gave him my old iPhone so he could call us if need be, but disabled Safari for this reason. After about 8 weeks of school, we had to enable it because the teachers were expecting children to use their smart phones to do research in class.

A different concern for single sex schools now is the social contagion aspects of eating disorders and rapid onset gender dysphoria. I read newspaper articles recently (was it on MN?) of one of the private all girls schools in London that had 10 trans girls who identified as boys in their sixth form. Not to say that it could not happen at a mixed school but from my subjective personal experience here at a city in the USA when parents and students choose secondary schools I noticed that the most perfectionistic and academically competitive girls chose the girls schools. My dds deliberately avoided the girls school because of the type of girl that chose it and my girls found them too intense.

My 2 girls at or going to single sex secondary largely for this reason. My 9 year old said recently that some of the boys in her class were "touching her bum". Sad as they were friends. Dd1 didn't have this issue at primary but dd2 is very conventionally pretty and I already see the difference in treatment.

Why would a teacher even be dealing with a rape attack. It’s a police matter for a specialist unit, it’s not a school matter. It’s a serious offence and schools dealing with it is minimising it.

That’s awful, vickyy. Have escalated it over teacher’s head?

In our city there are single sex state schools. They are not for "cosseted perfectionist" pupils and the kids hang out with the opposite sex outside school.

I went to a mixed comp. Not having my girls going through that thanks.

I have a feeling that some of these sexual assaults are also racist ones. Rochdale and Rotherham spring to mind