Playground sex assaults ‘are becoming an epidemic’

[SanctimoniousMorph]

www.thetimes.co.uk/edition/news/playground-sex-assaults-are-becoming-an-epidemic-wcxh63tll

Hidingtonothing

And yet the DfE are apparently baffled by the rise in home education confused DD has been HE from the offset, I’m praying she doesn’t decide she wants to go to school as she gets older.

Yy.
Dd is a teenager now, never been to school, doesn't suffer fools. (And yes, has friends, does maths etc etc)

Why would a teacher even be dealing with a rape attack. It’s a police matter for a specialist unit, it’s not a school matter. It’s a serious offence and schools dealing with it is minimising it.

I assume it is because the school operates in loco parentis which means far too often they handle it "in the family" to avoid bad publicity for the schools.

Well no wonder it’s a problem then if the correct response to rape isn’t prioritised. Getting evidence, rape kits, support for the victim etc., counselling for the victim. Wtf, schools are going above their pay grade trying to deal with rape.

Anecdotally, it's pretty typical for the school to actively discourage the survivor from going to the police

Sadly, it's a new variation on an old theme. Many schools are more interested in covering their arses than doing anything. Way back in the late 70s my mum taught in an appalling school. It was discovered that some of the kids were making "kung fu throwing stars" for use at football matches (this was at the height of football hooliganism and the "inter city firms") - the head teacher's immediate response was "how do we stop the police getting involved?"

There was also sexual violence - my mum had one of her 12 year old tutor group in tears one day. The girl had gone to the phone box outside the school to ring her mum, and found the phone already ringing. She picked it up, and it turned out to be a punter trying to contact one of the older girls - some bastard was prostituting schoolgirls using the phonebox outside the school gates as a contact number. Again, hushed up and brushed under the carpet.

My mum just about ended up with a nervous breakdown from the stress of trying to help her pupils against a backdrop of senior management who didn't give a crap.

So I'm afraid it doesn't surprise me in the slightest that schools are failing their female pupils. As far as I can see, the only substantive change in school management practices between the 70s and now is that it's now much, much harder to permanently exclude a pupil. And unfortunately this goes hand in hand with a massive social change which means that really violent misogynistic porn is just a tap or two away on some child's smartphone.

Forgive me but are parents not informed either. So girls who are the victims are not given any support and their parents are not informed. It doesn’t sound like parents have a say in the process either. I’m speechless that the bastard rapists are not dealt with by police and the court system.

I’m very happy to explain why teachers will “put a rapist back in the same class” .... because the parents of said rapist/child who has sexually assaulted will INSIST it didn’t happen/isn’t true/wasn’t their fault. Just like parents do ALL THE TIME when a school attempts to tell parents their child is in the wrong. You see it on MN almost every day! Teachers says my child did such and such but I know better/teacher is wrong/teacher picks in him or my all time favourite “I know when my child is lying.” And if that doesn’t work because there were three dozen witnesses all of whom are high court judges and policemen and at least three CCTV videos with full audio, then its “it’s not his fault/looks worse than it is/didn’t know what he was doing/only did it because he was bullied/has ADHD/ASD/ODD/PSA and it is actually the schools fault for not supervising properly/meeting his needs etc .........and the girl - well she gets thrown to the wolves because she doesn’t count. Because girls parents will nearly always back away from supporting their daughters because “the girl encouraged him” is still the unwritten rule of sexual assault.
And sorry to say but it’s almost always the mother defending the son. 90% plus of the time. If they are in primary, it’s the “didn’t know what they were doing - how dare you accuse my baby of that - it’s natural for children to explore” bollocks and if they are in secondary then it’s usually flat denial or a take of how the girl has encouraged it and the poor boy “misunderstood.”
Not a school problem - a parent problem.

But why would a parent want to put their child in a situation where she was seeing her abusers every day. I agree that parents have a long list of acrynoms to trot out to excuse their child’s behaviour but it doesn’t excuse sexual assault or rape. If things are this bad then my future grandchildren will not be attending school any time soon.

With a couple of comments on here about the difficulties teachers have working through slt and head teachers, it occurs to me that even today teachers are overwhelmingly female... head teachers are overwhelmingly male.

wrong
I’m female and a head teacher of a few schools both primary and secondary. I spend at least 50% of my time dealing with parents of children who will not accept what the SLT or head of school decisions. I know that teachers often think that SLT and HT don’t support them but they sometimes don’t understand just how hard it is. I’ve been hit twice by parents; had objects including a chair thrown at me; been threatened with either physical violence or being “sued” more times than I can remember but have needed police protection and presence school at least a dozen times over the last 5 years.
The vast majority of parents will not accept that their child has done wrong. They simply won’t and they fight the school every inch of the way and that is why the state system is on its knees and teachers leaving in droves. Sorry - not meaning to derail the thread bit I’ve dealt with 1 serious sexual assault and numerous more ‘minor ones’ and the response from the boys parents is ALWAYS the same. Excuse, excuse, excuse and blame everyone and anyone else including the girl. The police are reluctant to get involved - mainly because its nearly always one word (boy) against other (girl). I permanently exclude for any sexual offenders in senior school and get taken to panel every time. Parents are the problem - they defend everything, blame everyone else’s and take responsibility for NOTHING.

Effie that's so interesting my father is retired now but taught for his whole career over 40 years and was very senior he saw this change over the years. Parents used to be far far more likely to support the school over their child but over the decades this has switched.

I was also sexually assaulted by two boys at primary school at 10. I think it was a post year 6 SATS or Christmas Party to a local activity centre.

The two boys asked if I wanted to play Tag with them in the tubnels. They both ran in from either entrances and said 'we're playing a different type of game'. I was groped in every place and they forced kissed me.

I can still remember that tunnel, the way the pushed me down and how every second went. I told my head teacher but nothing was done.

In year 10/11 another boy used to hold me up against the wall/science benches whenever he saw me and beg to touch my breasts. He was over 6ft and it was scary.

Reading this thread I'm not putting my girls into mixed ed.

I still remember, aged 10 or 11, a couple of boys at primary school trying to pull my trousers and pants down (lunch hour on the school playing field). We were all pre-pubescent, so there wasn't a huge strength discrepancy yet, and I fought like a wild cat and managed to kick them off. This would have been the mid 70s! Thank god I got to go to a girls' secondary school. I would not have liked to meet them a few years down the line.

I've recently had to step in and stop a friendship DS had with another child (primary school age), because the other boy is showing signs already of turning into a sex pest, and I am not prepared to have DS around him.

We were thinking about putting DD in a single sex school for secondary for a variety of reasons - I've just added "reduced risk of sexual assault" onto the list

Why are the boys still in school rather than a YOI?

Many reasons, I would suggest, including

• the assault not being reported to anyone
• the assault being reported but minimised (by teachers, parents, peers...)
• the assault being reported but dealt with under standard school disciplinary procedures, such as would be used for a fight
• the assault being reported and escalated within school, but not reported to the police
• the police receiving a report but failing to investigate
• the police filing a report but the CPS deciding not to proceed
• the CPS pressing charges but failing to get a conviction
• the judge deciding not to impose a custodial sentence

Auntie
It’s unbelievable and will be the reason I leave early. I can cope with endless budget cuts and government policy madness but parents are beyond a fucking joke now.
Last term, a receptionist witnessed a boy above his phone between a girls legs saying “I bet you are wearing a thong, you dirty girl.” Head confiscated phone and suspended boy. Parents of said boy kicked up absolute shit; firstly denying it ever happened and accusing the receptionist and girl of lying because “they can tell when there child lies” but refusing to get their child to unlock the phone so we could see the photo and contacting the police to try to get the phone back. Then when we realized as it was in the foyer the CCTV had captured it; the parents without missing a beat went to blaming the girl. Boy and friends then started a social media campaign against the girl accusing her of causing it, calling her a tart, a whore and worse. Fully known by parents who did nothing. Finally got the police involved and phone was unlocked - full of down loaded porn and said photograph. Parents then blamed “bad influence” of friends
Sorry but parents are the issue - they do not know what there children are looking at on line, can’t be bothered to police it and refuse to take any responsibility for their boy’s behavior.

*above = shove
And multiple misses of there instead of their!!
I am a teacher honest!!

I noticed in the article it talks about sexual offenses and rapes reported to the police, so the question is also what was the outcome of that? Were there prosecutions or sentences? If very few individuals were charged then that can make it difficult for schools to move forward, especially if they don't have strong policies.

I was involved with creating policies and procedures for a university, where most of the victims/survivors and accused are likely to be adults (although it was not in the UK and a slightly higher age of majority + an earlier starting age meant that most of our first year students were minors) and managing cases where there was heavy police involvement were much much easier (although historically this was used as an excuse to do nothing).

My children both went to mixed schools, and the culture in the school was actually very good, it was outside of school where the assaults occurred and because parties and alcohol were often involved one of the big issues was getting the girls involved to tell any adults. I hope that they would have been supported, but sadly they were convinced that the most likely outcome was being told off and having their freedom restricted.