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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

"Feminism is equality"

226 replies

MrGHardy · 09/08/2018 17:06

This is a response by a woman to a man talking about feminism:

"Your understanding is wrong. Where does everyone get this idea that feminism is some kind of for-all happy umbrella? It's for the equality of women vis-a-vis men. And men, Mr. Read, don't get to decide what feminism is."

I have come across this so often recently, where feminism is portrayed as "for equality so it is also for men" etc. and this Twitter user used a good phrase: "some kind of for-all happy umbrella".

I think it's a deliberate misrepresentation of feminism, in order to distract the discussion away from the issues, away from women, and to paint women in a bad light as some sort of female supremacists if they disagree with the idea, feminism is equality for all i.e. also for men. The idea "feminism is for women does not imply it is not for equality" seems also hard for people to understand and is easily misrepresented.

How do you deal with this? If you constantly have to first convince people that feminism is not for men, not a blanket "for-all happy umbrella", it gets very frustrating and distracts from the issue at hand (and instead leads to a debate about what feminism is, and what its goals are and who it is for). Additionally, as a man you are quickly accused of mansplaining (especially by women who for some reason believe that feminism is also for men) or at least asked for a definition which is a) difficult to do for me b) at least in my case necessarily leads to accusations of mansplaining.

OP posts:
LangCleg · 10/08/2018 17:47

Is this thread actually real?

My feminism will be proboscidean or it will be bullshit?

WTAF?

LangCleg · 10/08/2018 17:48

Lord fucking save me. I need some time off.

FloralBunting · 10/08/2018 17:58

Mammoths, sabre toothed tigers, lobsters, clownfish. Understanding all these things is utterly, utterly fundamental to the free and fair society.

Datun · 10/08/2018 18:01

I wonder what our OP is making of their thread?

FloralBunting · 10/08/2018 18:05

Perhaps that it is a 9 page long example of what they were referring to?

CuriousaboutSamphire · 10/08/2018 18:06

I think I wish I hadn't started reading this.... I feel queasy, murderous and need of a sabre tooth tigger of my very own!

Datun · 10/08/2018 18:08

Perhaps that it is a 9 page long example of what they were referring to?

Yes. It's proving their point very effectively.

LangCleg · 10/08/2018 18:12

Mammoths, sabre toothed tigers, lobsters, clownfish. Understanding all these things is utterly, utterly fundamental to the free and fair society.

Don't forget the strawberries. I'm sure there's something we're supposed to know about strawberries if we ever hope to woman correctly.

ReluctantCamper · 10/08/2018 18:17

I quite like it when an MRA type comes to play

i can be monumentally rude to them, safe in the knowledge that they really deserve it, and I won't fall foul of MNHQs weird belief that we should go out of our way to make some men welcome here.

UpstartCrow · 10/08/2018 18:19

It is handy to know what their latest arguments are. I don't think they've changed for ooh, at least 200,000 years, but you never know.

CardsforKittens · 10/08/2018 18:38

what do we want?

Mammoths

when do we want them?

10,000 years ago

This keeps popping back into my head every few minutes and making me cry with laughter.

Datun · 10/08/2018 18:43

CardsforKittens

Same here. I keep snorting. It's genius.

BertrandRussell · 10/08/2018 18:53

Is it time for Bertrand’s List? I’ll see if I can find it....

FloralBunting · 10/08/2018 19:10

I always appreciate an MRA. There's almost something nostalgically simplistic about them. Without reading the responses to previous MRAs over the years, I would probably have never understood the application of feminist ideas, and be totally unprepared to recognize the tactics in real life, or on display among their younger, more delicately girlish cousins, the TRAs.

Datun · 10/08/2018 19:11

I don't think our little misogynist will be returning. I believe he has been shown the door. A PBP?

TheCountryGirl · 10/08/2018 19:15

Yes, Floral, I feel like tickling heir little bellies now. 😂

TheCountryGirl · 10/08/2018 19:15

Their ffs! I can spell, honest!

CanineEnigma · 10/08/2018 20:00

Poor mammoths. What did they ever do to you, you crowd of MERFs.

BertrandRussell · 10/08/2018 20:21

What do we want? Gradual change! When do we want it? In due course!

thebewilderness · 10/08/2018 20:50

With 54 percent of women aged 18 to 24, and 44 percent of women aged 25-34 identified with the term. Only 36 percent of women 55 and above would call themselves feminists.

What do you suppose happened between the 7% claim in 2016 and this result in 2017, or is it all in who you ask, eh?

ErrolTheDragon · 10/08/2018 21:23

It depends how you ask too:
https://yougov.co.uk/news/2018/03/08/when-feminist-not-feminist/

Full results, with a couple of additional questions here
https://d25d2506sfb94s.cloudfront.net/cumulusuploads/document/0b1c4ebn2j/InternalResultssFeminismFeb188Toplines_w.pdf

As far as I can see, the respondents were mixed, not just women, and even the bald 'are you a feminist' had 27% saying yes, 22% not sure.

TalkingintheDark · 10/08/2018 21:48

Fucking mammoths

😂😂😂

ReluctantCamper I doff my hat to you. Fucking on fire.

Fucking mammoths

BettyDuMonde · 11/08/2018 10:59

My 18 year old son says he is a libertarian.

In reality, he’s just tight fisted - doesn’t want to pay tax.

His Caesarian birth means he’s in debt to the system already though.
I’m hoping his libertarianism is just a youthful folly, a rebellion against working class lefty parents;

Mr Shooz is likely as mature as my teenager.

MrGHardy · 11/08/2018 22:17

Oh wow, I was a bit busy so haven't got back to this yet, eager to read the thread, thanks for all the replies!

OP posts:
MrGHardy · 11/08/2018 22:54

BettyDuMonde
As usual Magdalen is amazing! Thank you.

"I saw some fb messages under a Pool (I know...) article today about how much nicer liberal feminists are because they want to include everyone and how nasty radical feminists are because they hate men (blah, blah) and then, of course, a load of woke men patting the lovely little lady on the head. It was so depressing."

Yes, this rings very true.

Datun
Thanks, I like this part "Equality would mean subjecting men to the same things that women are subjected to. Marriage to older women, cutting their genitals, two a week being killed by women, 85,000 a year being raped by women, etc. Feminism advocates to remove this, not duplicate it to achieve equality. "

As you just pointed out now that I read your second post, it fits very well with RBG clip. And yes, I follow him on Twitter already, book is already on my reading list :)

TheCountryGirl
"Yes there is obviously no subjugation of women when they outperformed boys at school, took more places at university yet still manage to somehow NOT be fairly represented in top positions in practically every company and organisation."

Amen to that. And cue Snu with the "it's their choice" reply :P

ReluctantCamper
That link about the husband stitch is sick.

Betty
"Of course men can be feminist allies."

Tbh I hate that term. It's the same term used by all those woke muppets "oh how can I be a better ally", "sorry I wasn't aware, just trying to be the best ally I can". It reeks of "tell me what to do and I will bend over backwards to do it as long as you give me a cookie". I support feminism to me is much better than I am a feminist ally.

IDontEatFriedTurtle
"Oh and re the OP I really don't see why you need to get in to a discussion with a woman ever to tell her definition of feminism is incorrect. That would be mansplaining."

Why? Ofc this thread was motivated by recent discussion on trans issues, how can I argue my case if I can't say that feminism by it's nature must exclude men? Also why would it be mansplaining if I am saying the truth? Feminism isn't for men. Many women thinking otherwise surely does not change that.

DrNu
I wasn't going to engage your trolling but: "So, the reason why we don't have more women as CEOs in the top 100 FTSE companies isn't because of a denial of opportunity, it's because they just don't want to."

Really man? You think there aren't 50 women in the UK who are talented and determined enough and hard working enough? And simultaneously you assume that a male board of directors is wholly unbiased choosing between a man and a woman? No, you're right, must be the "they are too lazy and untalented".

Finished page 5, going to bed now.

OP posts:
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