Sorry to derail the sherry debate.
But I'm not sure where to post this, and I think this thread is the most relevant, re third spaces.
I went shopping in a retail park M & S late this evening. (Yep, that M & S despair is a whole other thread itself on Style and Beauty, so we'll gloss over that!).
To the male-bodied trans person who was looking at 'female-classified' shoes, I hope it was a good experience for you and you found what you were looking for. Shoes shouldn't be gendered.
But if you were hoping you 'passed', you didn't. I'm really sorry (female socialisation apologising going on) I deliberately didn't stare, didn't single you out. But I knew exactly who you were.
But it means if I'd have seen you going into the changing rooms with me, I'd have felt a little bit uncomfortable, but hey, they're all single rooms .
It was very quiet, there were few people around this evening in the store, full stop. Nothing like a previous poster's assertions that A transsexual will likely be hugely outnumbered by the group that they are supposedly a threat to in the ladies changing rooms. I think there were only one or two other people in the changing rooms this evening.
And I'm a pretty feisty, confident female, so it's not a problem for me.
But I'm here for the females it might be a problem for.
For the changing room staff, for the females who don't feel comfortable or safe around male-bodied people.
I realise I'm projecting, as that shopper I saw may never have ventured into the changing rooms.
But the consistent drilling message from some quarters about 'we need to be in your space, otherwise we're unsafe' doesn't hold sway with me.
If you don't feel safe in male-bodied spaces, that doesn't give you an automatic 'in' to female-bodied spaces.
You need to find another solution. Otherwise it just feels like an abusive forcing into other's spaces.