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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

How can I call down from my rage today?!

36 replies

Pomeranio9834 · 07/03/2018 19:01

After an absolutely infuriating day at work being belittled and possibly disciplined and being told I don't have the right to voice my opinion on a subject because I AM A WOMAN I have come home and ripped poor DP to shreds about how frustrating it is being a woman surrounded by balding middle aged men with the opinion that I am a lesser species I have got myself so worked up that I am shaking with rage.

How can I calm down enough to actually eat my leftover Chinese food.

But seriously, bollocks to fucking everything. And bollocks to all the women at work who giggle and take the blatant discrimination and sexism and fit into the little box cral2eated for them because it's the easy thing to do.

Bollocks bollocks bollocks and fuck off.

OP posts:
Original poster
Pomeranio9834 · 07/03/2018 19:01

Fucking created not whatever shit that says

OP posts:
Original poster
Pomeranio9834 · 07/03/2018 19:02

I MEANT CALM IN MY TITLE ARGGGHHHHH

I must be on my period and that's why I can't spell

OP posts:
morningrunner · 07/03/2018 19:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 07/03/2018 19:04

I must be on my period and that's why I can't spell OK... stepping away from the thread!

Branleuse · 07/03/2018 19:06

eugh, what were you not allowed to voice your opinion about. Can we help share your rage, or would we make it worse?

AssassinatedBeauty · 07/03/2018 19:06

I think that was a joke?

Sorry you're being treated like that at work Thanks Have you got anyone that you can ask for advice like a union or a professional body?

TallulahWaitingInTheRain · 07/03/2018 19:09

But seriously, bollocks to fucking everything

This is pretty much how I feel at the moment OP. Solidarity.

RunFarRunFree · 07/03/2018 19:09

Bar of chocolate and a light movie to distract yourself.

ParadiseCity · 07/03/2018 19:09

I feel your pain. I am a woman surrounded by mansplaining fools.

Alexkate2468 · 07/03/2018 19:09

An angry, ranting feminist... How strange 😂

^light-hearted

Genuinely sorry you're upset. I don't have anything helpful to say as you don't really give much information about what happened. Hope you can down soon.

bellasuewow · 07/03/2018 19:11

Yes it is rage inducing but when women are angry we are just dismissed as crazy. Don’t get angry get active and chip away. Write to your local councillor, your mp and donate to Jessica James and pilgrim crowdfunds. Complete the online consultations. Stay informed. Post support on mumsnet. Join Twitter and post support for activists and tweets. Talk to friends and family. Pick your battles. Joining the voices and doing a bit makes me feel less angry and that I am doing a small bit for women and for my daughter.

weaselwords · 07/03/2018 19:11

Hold onto your rage and feed off it and never ever give in.

Some things are important enough to get angry about.

Original poster
Pomeranio9834 · 07/03/2018 19:13

Yes that was a joke. Another comment made today by a male senior manager "that I just be on my period and that's why I've taken it so personally"

I didn't take it FUCKING PERSONALLY you were talking bollocks and I told you so. Politely and professionally. ARGH.

Basically, I sent an email with a list of the employee suggestions to be reviewed from the boxes. Man 1 replied "poor effort". Man 2 replied "some of us have bigger fish to fry" and man 3 replied saying "don't you have anything better to do?"

  1. No I don't have anything better to do because part of my job is to ensure that the suggestions are responded to so I'm actually just doing my job that I'm paid to do...

So I replied saying (professionally) that that was a disappointing attitude from senior managers to have about valid employee concerns, and does nothing to help the already terrible company culture and low morale etc

Man 1 told me to get back into my box

Man 2 told man 1 that "this is what happens when we let them into the work place (no, I'm not joking)

Man 3 said to my boss, Is she on her period that's she's so they

I wasn't even "ragey" in my email. But apparently I must have been on my period for making a valid point.

Then man 4 told me to clean up the board room after his meeting. I'm in fucking HR not board cleaning fuck off. And why have you walked past approx. 34 men to come to the other side of the office to tell me to clean it up as the only women up here?!?!?!

ARGH.

unfortunately nobody to complain to. No union. My manager is also a woman and has the same day in and day out but is one of the giggle stays in her box kind.

OP posts:
Original poster
Pomeranio9834 · 07/03/2018 19:15

And I know there are so so so many more important feminism issues out there but this just really pushed me over the sodding edge today.

After being told yesterday "why can't you dress more like Sally (not real name). She always looks lovely"

YES SHE DOES LOOK LOVELY IN HET PENCIL SKIRTS AND HEELS AND GOOD FOR HER SHE LOOKS FABULOUS but go just fuck off

OP posts:
relaxitllbeok · 07/03/2018 19:16

OMFG. You need a new job. Sorry you're having to deal with this, in the meantime. Maybe consider joining a union, even if that's not common in your workplace? You might get, eg, employment law advice. Dunno.

TallulahWaitingInTheRain · 07/03/2018 19:16

OP, the fact that they are all still alive (... are they?) is an impressive tribute to your self-control

stiffstink · 07/03/2018 19:16

Did they mention the period thing in an email?!

Original poster
Pomeranio9834 · 07/03/2018 19:17

Oh (so outing if any colleagues are on mumsnet but fuck it)

Getting told all the "ladies" could leave at 3 in the snow because we can't drive in the snow but the men can stay until 5 because they'll be okay... EXCUSE ME WHAT NOW.

HOW IS THIS STILL A THING IN 2018

OP posts:
Original poster
Pomeranio9834 · 07/03/2018 19:18

No the period thing was said downstairs in the canteen and heard by Sally coincidentally who told me because she's nice like that Grin

OP posts:
Babdoc · 07/03/2018 19:20

I was going to suggest you complain to HR, but I just spotted that's where you already work! How about showing them the policies on equality in the workplace - you know, the ones they're responsible for implementing? Bunch of dinosaurs.

rememberthetime · 07/03/2018 19:22

OH wow! That is all awful and very clear sexual discrimination. Please please start writing down every incident of this type and keep all emails that show this behaviour.

I am almost in disbelief at this.

I would love to suggest that you get your Union involved and take them to a tribunal, but I know it's not as easy as that. I just wish you could. There must be a process for making an official complaint however? or just a warning that any more sexist and discriminatory behaviour and you will consider legal action?

I am really sorry you have to put up with that.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 07/03/2018 19:22

Holy shit! Apologies for having misunderstood.

New job... and if any of that shit was in an email... ACAS or union and nail the bastards!

Anatidae · 07/03/2018 19:23

Fucking hell. I wasn’t even there and I feel like my spleen might pop.

The snow thing... ffs. I live in Sweden, I drive over conditions that’d make them wet themselves four months a year.

Ask heard plenty of ‘why aren’t you wearing heels’ shit. To which I reply with my winningest smile, ‘haha. When I see the Male executives wearing heels for 18 hours a day I will do likewise. Men’s work attire looks so... comfortable.’

bellasuewow · 07/03/2018 19:25

God op where do you work..... seriously. That sounds appalling. You are justified to be enraged.

Worldsworstcook · 07/03/2018 19:27

Bath
Book
Bed

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