Evidence of misandry on Feminist chat.

[UpstartCrow]

The last few days, there have been several claims of misandry on Feminist Chat. Please post examples here using a link and screen shot.

Thank you.

The Goal

I definitely don't think that people like you are the problem.

The 'male tears' was a Tumblr trend a while back where prominent 'feminists' posted pictures of themselves drinking from mugs emblazoned with 'male tears'. It was intended as a mockery of men's issues, which IMHO just reinforces the whole toxic masculinity idea about it being unmanly to cry etc.

I know I probably come across as bitter and truculent at times, but it's likely because I see these issues as affecting us as a human society rather than as two opposing 'female' and 'male' sides at war - although I do understand the need to recognise and discuss male violence.

Prat - how do you think the issue of male violence should be resolved? I promise never to use my Male Tears mug ever again.

I'm going to make it my business to buy several male tears mugs. I will enjoy a nice cup of tea out of a male tears mug. And I'll also enjoy making the slave DH do the same.

Feminists aren't the problem, no matter what bullcrap misogynists spout.

"I see these issues as affecting us as a human society rather than as two opposing 'female' and 'male' sides at war"

Do you think that your ability to view the issues like this is down to the fact that you are a man? In that you are not on the "side" that suffers the effects?

prat

There are all sorts of feminists out there. Some who think men are women, some who hate men.

Why don't you take it up with them?

The feminists here at tend to be grown-up and rational. With arguments they can back up.

Men consistently come on here and try to tell women they're doing it wrong, drop in a bit of whataboutery and accuse women of man hating. And almost always end up with the not so novel conclusion that if only women said please, feminism would work better.

When that's patently bollocks.

It took 15 years to persuade men that there should be a law against marital rape. 15 years of lobbying, committees, minutes, campaigns, meetings, conferences.

The idea that men will concede any power or privilege whatsoever, as long as we ask nicely, is clearly, obviously and evidentially wrong.

And tedious beyond belief.

Prat - how do you think the issue of male violence should be resolved? I promise never to use my Male Tears mug ever again.

Thanks for putting this so neatly. I couldn't find a sufficiently pithy formulation, and gave up.

If I'm completely honest, the 'male tears' thing grinds my gears, but it's an utter trifle in the scheme of things.

Do you have any other examples, prat?

If prat can come up with how he can sort out male violence, I promise to remove the male tears sticker from the side of my bath. It will make my DH sad that I will, because he bought it for me, but I think it's the least I can do for prat when he solves 10s of 1000s of years of male violence simply by being nice.

I see these issues as affecting us as a human society rather than as two opposing 'female' and 'male' sides at war

But it IS a male V female thing, given its male people attacking women, not the other way around (broadly speaking, before a story about a woman abusing a man comes up)

This sounds to me very much like 'its people committing violence thats the problem, not male violence'. And while it is true that its singular people, it just so happens that its almost always male people. So surely, saying this should not be a problem? It should not be viewed as man hating, 'misandry' or any such bollocks if someone says male violence is an epidemic.

And almost always end up with the not so novel conclusion that if only women said please, feminism would work better.

I say please when I ask the slave DH to make me a cup of tea in my lovely mug with male tears fluffy kittens on it.

(I still find my favourite response to MRA talking points is taking the piss!)

Maybe Assassinated, but I still think that animosity, while understandable, just breeds more animosity.

The alt-right, MRAs, Reddit trolls/misogynists, PUA movement, etc, etc, seem to have sprung up and rallied in recent years and it often seems to me that it's partly a knee jerk reaction. These are mainly young guys who weren't around when women didn't have the vote etc and have maybe even seen young women outperforming them in the workplace/education. They read all the Tumblr hate, see the videos of 'Big Red' on YouTube shouting at people to "shut the fuck up, I'm speaking" and become unrepentant misogynists.

There seem to be a whole demographic of third-wave feminists who devote their time to arguing with MRAs and it's tiring and pointless from both sides. Like the videos where Milo Yiannopoulos bangs on about the left trying to silence free speech, and then the 'feminists' stand up and blow air horns etc to interrupt, and then the bros start chanting "USA USA".

It's just so puerile and pointless and is sadly what many people now identify feminism/identify politics with. That's partly why I dislike all the point-scoring, tit-for-tat sentiments so often seen in forums discussing these issues. It's like the byproduct of the fringes has now become the main event for many.

I don't think many of these MisandryMermaid types are really representative of 'true' feminism but sadly they are what many people associate with the term.

Prat - how do you think the issue of male violence should be resolved? I promise never to use my Male Tears mug ever again.

You see animosity, I see weary and fed up. Honestly, the animosity of women isn't going to kill you, injure you or in any way harm you.

And you don't seem to think that posters here demonstrate this kind of "misandry" that turns you away from tackling the issues that face women. This thread was about the supposed epidemic of misandry on the feminist chat threads. Where is it?

The alt-right, MRAs, Reddit trolls/misogynists, PUA movement, etc, etc, seem to have sprung up and rallied in recent years and it often seems to me that it's partly a knee jerk reaction.

Yes. Because women are making headway. And they can't bear it.

Women are financially independent and the nuclear family concept is on its way out. Men aren't as 'required' as they used to be.

They are losing ways with which to make women feel grateful.

And they're livid. Because their god given entitlement to sex is getting them nowhere.

It's all pure misogyny.

And little wonder that there is a clarion call to make women be nicer.

What they mean is I want to control women and stick my dick in as many of them as possible, and you damn feminists are making it difficult.

I don’t know how people go though life and not see this stuff.

100 schoolgirls were kidnapped in Nigeria the other day - maybe that’s more of a pressing issue than some girl’s cup in the USA? Or perhaps the millions of girls that don’t exist in certain parts of the world because they weren’t considered worth being born/raised. Or the women and girls trafficked across continents to be raped as part of the sex trade. Or the 100s of girls right here in the U.K. that are groomed and abused by gangs and then blamed and punished for their own abuse by the police and social services. But you know, nothing to see here, no where near as important or pressing an issue as what some women say or have written on a cup.

You could put your hand in your pocket and donate to a charity that helps women and girls instead of moaning on here that women aren’t nice enough. You could have the upper hand and moral high ground then couldn’t you.

As I said before, a starting point is not alienating young men before they even reach college age and trying to promote genuine discussion rather than point scoring.

As I said before, a starting point is not alienating young men before they even reach college age and trying to promote genuine discussion rather than point scoring.

How do feminists alienate young men before they reach college age?

So young men's sexism and misogyny is down to feminists alienating them whilst they're at school and university? How does that happen?

It isn't women or Feminism that alienates young men. It is porn culture.
Men have taught men for centuries that women were created for men to use. Men dispute with men how best to use women. It is not a men vs women team sport, it is these men vs those men. Women are the ball.
You must be so shocked, Prat, that we hate it just as much as our foremothers did.

That's partly why I dislike all the point-scoring, tit-for-tat sentiments so often seen in forums discussing these issues.

Unless it is you scoring points or getting your tit over someone else's tat AMIRITE?

So young men's sexism and misogyny is down to feminists alienating them whilst they're at school and university?

Of course it will be 'women's' fault! Everything is the fault of some woman or other.

As I said before, a starting point is not alienating young men before they even reach college age

Good Lord.

You're now blaming women for the behaviour of men?

Do you think all the women who are raped are misandrists?

Do you think men who treat women as less than human ask first what their opinions are?

Do you think they care?

I will never understand why ordinary men get so defensive when women speak of the men who do attack and assault women on a regular basis.
10th rule of misogyny: The worst thing about male violence is that it makes men look bad.

As I said before, a starting point is not alienating young men before they even reach college age and trying to promote genuine discussion rather than point scoring.“

What form should the discussion take? Could you provide topics?

And how are young men alienated?

Do you need to do a risk assessment so ingrained that you barely realise you are doing it every time a man sits next to you on public transport? Or any time a man you don't know speaks to you, even if it is a public place? Or any time you go to a public toilet where there is a corridor including the men's and ladies doors separate from the public area? How often do you cross the street to avoid walking past a man or to check that a man isn't following you? The list is endless. And we women have to do that so automatically that, as I said, it's hard to imagine being someone who doesn't have to do that

I don't live my life in this constant state of fear. Nothing like it.

One very swift way to stop male university students from turning out to be misogynists is to eliminate rape culture and tackle porn and prostitution.

But it's not glamorous, is it? It's hard, soul destroying graft.

And men look at women like Julie Bindel, who has spent her entire life tackling these very issues, and say bloody feminazi.

Because she is actively taking away their entitlement to sex and their sense of privilege.

Men don't hate feminists because they're not nice enough. They hate them because they are spoiling their 'fun'.