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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Was Greer Right When She Said Men Hate Women?

511 replies

LastGirlOnTheLeft · 09/02/2018 23:02

I have just skim read The Female Eunuch and like everyone else, the stand out line to me was that men hate us but we aren't aware of the extent, and neither are they!!

Do you think this is true?? My DH, my late father and my brother, all immensely like/d and love/d the women in their lives. I hate to think it is true, but if it is, I want to know! I want to know my enemy.

OP posts:
overnightangel · 13/02/2018 16:33

If you hate men just have the fucking onvictioncto say it, ironic that people call men boring when we have to listen to the same old shit constantly about men being inherently bad. Embarrassing , predudiced lies

Fishfingersandwichnocheese · 13/02/2018 17:30

Oh look here is a man who has come here to educate all us women.

Please do expand on the statistics for violent behaviour and sexual violence and their correlation to the male sex ?

MrGHardy · 13/02/2018 17:42

overnightangel pretty sure that this thread is quite clear that there is a certain subset of men that is hated. Also quite clear from your behavior that you qualify for that subset. Your post is thus rather daft and, ironically, embarrassing for you. If I have learned anything browsing MN, fools are not suffered easily. Do yourself a favor and leave, before your ego is bruised even more.

Terftastic · 13/02/2018 18:12

You do sound very angry, overnightangel - almost incoherently so.

You know, women are allowed to talk about misogyny, how it affects us as half the human race. We're allowed to talk about oppression, how women have been (and still are, the world over) treated as chattel, or lesser humans.

If it weren't for women discussing this stuff - realising this stuff in the past - we still wouldn't be able to own property, or have the vote.

Original poster
LastGirlOnTheLeft · 13/02/2018 18:28

If you hate men just have the fucking onvictioncto say it,

You mean like all the men who say they hate women??

Funny, because the last time I checked they never seemed to say that, but their actions scream it!

OP posts:
Lettucepray · 13/02/2018 18:59

I miss Ray.........

Backenette · 13/02/2018 19:06

Oh you’re a chap.
Right.

Feminism doesn’t hate individual men. It wants to take down the patriarchy. My personal view is that the patriarchy hurts plenty of men too.

HairyBallTheorem · 13/02/2018 19:37

Reminder:

What male hatred of women (and other men too - male violence is a bit of a scatter gun) looks like: 2 women a week murdered by their partner or former partners; 85,000 women a year raped (and 12,000 men a year raped by other men).

What female "hatred" of men looks like: women getting annoyed about the above.

Not really equivalent, are they, even for the spectacularly hard-of-thinking (that's you, overnight, in case you hadn't worked that out).

Lettucepray · 13/02/2018 19:58

Overnightangel

I think it's back to that MRA site for you deary.

overnightangel · 13/02/2018 21:51

“If it weren't for women discussing this stuff - realising this stuff in the past - we still wouldn't be able to own property, or have the vote.“
There’s no discussion on here though though is there.Just angry people making generalisations , like terftasric being desperate to be a victim. It’s pointless arguing (and no no I’m not a man) given the narrow mindedness of people on here.

thebewilderness · 13/02/2018 21:58

What do you suggest, overnight? That we express our anger the way men do by killing people?
Best we express it here and at the ballot box, I think.

Fishfingersandwichnocheese · 14/02/2018 06:16

ironic that people call men boring when we have to listen to the same old shit constantly about men being inherently bad.

We ? This sounds a lot like you are a man to me.

TellsEveryoneRealFacts · 14/02/2018 07:44

It’s pointless arguing (and no no I’m not a man) given the narrow mindedness of people on here.

We all know nice men. And nasty ones. Even the nice ones expect things 'just because you are female'. Get the fuck over it or use your spare time to change that if it bothers you so much.

TheDowagerCuntess · 14/02/2018 08:50

ironic that people call men boring when we have to listen to the same old shit constantly about men being inherently bad

I think you are a man.

Fuck off then, if you don't like the conversation. Just piss off. No-one's going to miss you.

TheDowagerCuntess · 14/02/2018 08:51

I don't think the men in my life hate women.

The men in the comments section on FB, on the other hand, unswervingly do.

OneFlewOverTheDodosNest · 14/02/2018 09:19

I think GG is right that there's a complete dismissiveness of the lived experience of women and that this can turn nasty when women don't go along with what they want.

My father has always been lovely to me but gets great joy bonding with male friends by sending misogynistic videos on Whatsapp. My uncle always talked to me about being able to do anything I liked in my career, but had a quiet word when I got married about supporting my husband and being ready to follow his job around (that one really stung). Even my husband started from the assumption that we could have children without having it impact his life in anyway, with no thought of how he'd adapt his hours or have to rethink cycling on the weekends etc.

It's as though the cultural assumption is that individual women are lovely, men can love and appreciate them and genuinely like them as individuals, but they are essentially supporting actors in the Man-Show who make sure men have the life they're entitled to.

Fishfingersandwichnocheese · 14/02/2018 09:25

It's as though the cultural assumption is that individual women are lovely, men can love and appreciate them and genuinely like them as individuals, but they are essentially supporting actors in the Man-Show who make sure men have the life they're entitled to.

This. I’ve never seen it summed up so well before. And it makes me sad because it’s true.

IfyouseeRitaMoreno · 14/02/2018 09:53

Haha! Me too, that's a great summary Dodo!

As long as you accept that you'll only ever be second-best...

HandbagKrabby · 14/02/2018 09:59

Absolutely flew. Even when you have a woman in power she still only feels like a placeholder - like Teresa May coming in like a mum to sort out the Brexit shitshow and once it’s done and the game is set up back up again, the boys can come back in and take over, as per fucking usual.

Mn is full of threads about abusive, dismissive and thoughtless husbands and partners. If men in general truly saw women as they see themselves these threads would be rarer and more individualised - there would be no chorus of men don’t see dirt or men can’t remember birthdays.

TheDowagerCuntess · 14/02/2018 16:55

And when men hate women, they hit and kill them. Rape them. Their response is violence.

Our response, as a PP said, is just to get annoyed. Frustrated, maybe a bit resentful.

The saying should really be, 'hell hath no fury like a man scorned'.

Anatidae · 14/02/2018 19:10

Even the nice ones expect to be unencumbered by domestic life. And even the ones who accept they are not (my dh) butt up against this.

I had to go to hospital the other week. Dh took a late meeting with ds perched on his knee (because dh is a decent chap and frankly had no choice.)

Every man in that meeting had the same comment ‘oh why isn’t your wife/the nanny taking him?’ And we talked about this afterwards, about facilitation and how men expect to be able to just have late meetings and travel at the drop of a hat. And we concluded that this is going to be an issue - dh is very good at his job (I am too but magically I’m on the mummy track, which I’m sure will shock you all...)

So the default Male opinion was ‘oh cute kid, but why on earth are you not having a stay at home wife or a nanny?’

We both found it very depressing because we try our very best to parent and work equally, but I can SEE it coming - he’s going to be offered some fabulous job somewhere. Then what?

The whole world is set up like this - none of the senior women have young kids. (And incidentally they are then called ball breakers so you can’t fucking win either way...) Some, in fact a lot of the senior men do but they have a wife at home or a couple of nannies. So they’re off the hook.

Even ‘nice’ men who don’t loathe women, benefit from this shit. I bet not a single bloke in that meeting would say they were sexist - and they’re probably not in themselves. They probably say things like ‘well we would promote women but there just aren’t enough at the level we need.’ And the conclusion they draw is because maybe women are just not wanting it enough, or just not up to it. And none of them seems to connect that with the fact that there’s a small army of women behind them, enabling them to live that life.

It’s so frustrating.

CritEqual · 14/02/2018 19:41

More women need to avail themselves of a choice taken by many men. Namely be more willing to date/marry partners with less education and fewer career aspirations. As it stands as women are getting more educated and ambitious but still tend to prefer men of similar education/economic class or higher. This hamstrings them in the workplace as they are less likely to have a househusband putting them at a disadvantage compared to the men with housewives.

thebewilderness · 14/02/2018 19:44

So odd how women date and marry men they have things in common with. Clearly a failing on the women's part, eh?

CritEqual · 14/02/2018 19:52

It's not a failing it's a choice. If there is a failing it's the assumption that maybe someone from a different socio-economic bracket you won't have things in common with. One of my friends is an extremely successful Doctor and her husband looks after the kids and all the domestic stuff and it works very well for them. They still shock horror have values in common as well as plenty of other things.

thebewilderness · 14/02/2018 19:57

Some women do shop for servant husbands the same way men shop for servant wives. Perhaps you have heard of women going to Uni to get their MRS.
So you are suggesting that women should do what some women are already doing. Brilliant.