Bluestocking lock in!

[QuentinSummers]

Posted a whole thing on the last thread and it was locked!

Last thread here
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/3062013-The-Bluestocking-is-open-for-business
Here's my post replying to Moth
Thats an interesting article moth. Best not on the board or MRAs would be all over it!
I was wondering today, hopefully, if the news about darts getting rid of the girls means the overton window is shifting and maybe p0rn will become less acceptable?
If not all this hooha about F1 girls and the presidents club is just tinkering on the edges.

And before anyone says it's too early for the pub, the Bluestocking does an excellent americano...

Awful to hear about MSP "TIM is a woman" - is there a list of questions to ask to encourage their critical thinking and why aren't they concerned about the DV stats etc that show that there are good reasons to have single sex spaces?

Also therapy is tough @QuentinSummers n @0phelia - good luck - it is worth it normally - if the fit is right

Mines a decaf flat white - large!!

Mines a large decaf too please. Iv spend the whole night awake fretting about a woman very dear to me who broke down sobbing in my arms yesterday. Yet another survivor of male violence as a child. I had a vague idea as she had hinted before but was shocked and saddened at what came out yesterday. I made her promise to go and see a professional and said although she is assured of my support im too close to her to be of any proper use I thought. Feeling very dispairing this morning. People wonder why im a feminist...

Also wondering about waddles meeting. My msp replied ( 2 months later) saying hed fowarded my letter to the Scottish equalities minister to address my and another constituants 'very real concerns'
Re therapy agree woman fit has got to be right. Tough though.

Theinconstantgardener It's so enraging the extent of male violence and so under-reported and under-responded to. You sound like a good friend to have. And yes it all needs professional support - it's too much for one person, especially a close friend with no structured supervision in place - it undoes me if I take on too much of someone else's distress.

I'm still in therapy years later and the more steps I take the more casual male violence and verbal abuse is uncovered…stemming back throughout my life. People really don't understand the high price victims pay - in more ways than one.

On the up side another woman reclaiming her history is another person to join the chorus - so to speak.

Sound like a caffeinated coffee might be in order!! Hugs

Thanks woman
So sorry about your experiences. But yes agree that the more womens voices are heard the better in the long run.

Sorry wasnt meaning to be coy!

Ok wont say who my MSP is but he is SNP & not a back bencher.

He started by saying he wasnt aware of the amendment. He nodded along to mammals are male or female & cant change sex. Gender is social expectation & changes over time/place. GRA as legal fiction.
The people you think this applies to arent the people it does apply to (numbers), trans umbrella. (He raised his eyebrows here especially seem to understand the idea of men cross dressing for sexual thrill - he has a lot of knowledge about online sex offences so maybe this is why?) Talked about the constant numbers with GRA v.s the high self id numbers. Read the request from trans alliance that caused the amendment - it actually says it is important that transwomen without gra are included. Said law based on belief was dodgy & very open to abuse because we cant prove who believes what (he nodded & we talked about the lengths some men will go to access women, how can you legislate for indecent exposure/voyeurism if male self id into womens sing sex areas). I said women notice transwomen in bathrooms etc & we are polite. We also notice & ask men to leave & that would not be possible with self id - talked about shark cage type stuff teaching girls to accept men i their safe spaces etc & domestic violence.
He says scottish crime data is recorded by sex (& is confident that police scotland deal with more complex id fraud & wont have a problem with driving licences with sex exchanged on them etc) I pointed out news reporting was confusing. He said women's crime is rising & they dont know why but it's definately recorded as sex not gender. (He then did the politician thing of wittering on about his own pet project that is loosely related!)
We talked about prisons briefly (his staff were telling him to finish by now) & that whilst the committee that decides if men can be held in womens prison are considering the wellbeing of the man were they also considering the women who were no longer being held in a single sex place
His summation was that he could see that self id could have unintended consequences, i said yes & that whilst protecting individual self expression we need to also ask what about women & girls. He told me to come back & speak to him again if i wanted to.

I'm going to write to him to thank him for his time etc & think I will also ask him to get confirmation that the amendment about definition of woman only applies to that bill. i will go back to speak to him if anything moves forward.

Phew you're probably sorry for asking now! X

Also want to send & lots of to you awesome women.

just waving and offering coffee/beverage of choice around

I have a feeling freedom of stating biological facts is going to be curtailed here soon. Wonder if the Times will be able to keep it up.

woman

Yeah does seem that way doesn't it

it surely does Rufus
I would have a drink but I need a cup of tea to wake me up - working at home and it's so dark and dreary outside I'm struggling to get my brain to work if you know what I mean. But don't we only use 30% of light for seeing - the rest is for normal brain function? Or something? Sorry for vagueness.

luckily my team are all battling with planning for something that's happening after I've left so I'm a bit relaxed today till about 2pm I reckon.

Im having a very lazy day

Had a lazy week last week

I'm worried ive powered down too much

Very disappointed in the park run deletion

Rufus "I'm worried ive powered down too much"

sometimes you have to do that to recharge for later?

I'm sure comments of many kinds are a minefield for moderators

I'm disappointed in criticisms - here and elsewhere - of ManFriday. Showing what the law will mean in practical terms is just...an exercise in showing what the law means, or will mean.

I can't tell if it's "how very dare you show your breasts" - irony as I wonder if those people also campaign against page 3? Maybe they do. Or is it "how very dare you be a woman and question things".

Thats true...about the recharging

My dad mentioned the man friday thing

He said 'well now women are at it too'

Way to miss the point Daddy

I did put him straight

Plus why would a women want to do make only swimming

I can't think of anything worse

Massive generalisation but they seem unable to swim without drenching everyone with their splashing

Rufus
I think your dad is not alone tbh

I posted somewhere else - Ethical Living - about how much the world just baffles me now, but no responses.

I have no idea what anyone is on about anymore. Obviously I have followed the GRA development because of MN but without MN I don't know what I would have understood.

I spent a period of time thinking I must be really thick, but now all politics is beyond parody and satire. I'd like to go totally off grid myself but family etc...

I had a friend say to me "It's horrendously unfair to DC to go off grid". But surely people who do live off grid could argue that the kind of life we live (I mean my family, living in a rough outer London burb mostly because of needing proximity to elderly folks) - you could argue our life is making DC miss out on a whole bunch of lovely things?

It just comes down to what is socially acceptable. And then I think there's nothing stopping them moving back to London later in life if they fancy it.

sorry, that was a rant.

I would have loved to take the children off grid

Always been slightly envious of those people who take their children on a boat to foreign climes

And then we have a game of cards with them and the urge passes

We've just built a shed that we are furnishing as a pub...eventually. Dh has ideas of us getting away from it all with the children...at the bottom of the garden

Oh sorry woman

If your children are young enough then it would be an awesome thing to do

Were you thinking of very rural?

Rufus, yes, rural.

I would want an internet connection. What I can't fathom at the moment is the endless consumerism, obsession with coffee shops and eating out.

also I feel as if a lot of time at school is utterly wasted but - sorry if repeating myself - I think one issue with home education is the unpleasantness of being an authority figure to your DC in another way.

A lot of time is wasted

You could easily get the same amount of a days education into 3 hours...maybe even less

My children were bemoaning the fact that some of their peers rock up to school with the obligatory costa coffee , tha they have to walk past the school to buy

Woman we HE autonomously which means there is no extra burden of authority beyond usual parenting stuff

Waddle, sorry, what does that mean?

I meant DC seeing you as parent and teacher....maybe I'm overthinking this....

Rufus "My children were bemoaning the fact that some of their peers rock up to school with the obligatory costa coffee , tha they have to walk past the school to buy"

yes. I remember the children at my school who were labelled odd because they didn't meet norms...but they did seem to be fine. I wonder, have things become more vicious and less tolerant though? So a child sticks out more now than they did in the 80s and 90s?

more thinking aloud on this

another comment made to me was that children have to learn to socialise in a traditional school environment or they won't be able to integrate in a workplace

my sister didn't fit in to school at all - but okay, she was there.

she has taken to a traditional office work place just fine.

but also one of my other things is, the rural living and HE gives them two options hopefully - one is to inherit a place of reasonable self sufficiency and more money than if we went in for consumerism, the second option is that they can join regular other workplaces if that's what they want.

does this make sense? I've no thought of depriving them of TV, internet etc and I'm aware there will be a certain amount of driving them to meet friends and what have you and no telling them to just get on a bus. But the 2 option thing really strikes me. I think rural living and land will get more and more expensive.

well everything will get more expensive I suppose....

Autonomously or self directed. Unschooling is similar but we have bedtimes for my sanity & very limited screens.
My kids learn what they want to; I facilitate rather than teach.

Ken Robinson's TED talk about creativity and education might help with your fitting into the workforce questions.