OK, I'm a man now. Join me?

[AssignedPerfectAtBirth]

If I can't beat 'em...

I'm going to put my 'gender' as male now. Going to 'live a man' but I am not going to change my clothes, not that I wear skirts much anyway. I will still style my hair and wear makeup because I will not be defined.

So I'm going to tell me DH and children tonight. I'm not sure if DH will accept that he is now gay.

Any one want to out their inner man and join me on my journey?

NoToast

I am Spartacus as I am a man, and only men can be gladiators wielding big 'swords' and short leather skirts that show lovely toned thighs.

I am claiming my manhood and coming out of my now transvestite, transexual closet. Dh woke up rather surprised by finding out he is indeed now gay. Still our closet is big enough for the both of us to come out 🎈🎆🎉🎊🎇

So we would like to throw a coming out party for all of those that now identify as male after being assigned female gender status at birth. No more mothers ruin but lots of 🍺 beer and testicle scratching.

Slight disadvantage with the gay-ness - DH now thinks we will now be having a particular kind of sex. I pointed out I am happy to if the other way around also works, he pointed out I am lacking certain equipment, so now I am triggered and depressed :(

LTB for flaunting his cis-man privilege?

There are plenty of technological solutions Beyond, you don't have to be satisfied with what nature gave you. Don't let your cis tell you it's not exactly the same thing, that would be transphobic and bigoted.

Ah you will be fine beyond. You have an extra bonus front home after all.

*hole

Alright chaps.
I always knew there was something a bit wrong..I'd be striding along minding my own business, and some geezer would yell stuff out of a van at me!?
Or I would say something in a meeting and get ignored, only to have a bloke repeat what I had said. And then ask me if I was taking the minutes (even though we both had the same job description..)
I was also starting to feel a bit, I dunno, ignored and despised now I'm not a young bit of stuff anymore. .
But now I have embraced my male identity and become Titus Manhandle all that is a thing of the past! Now I'm actually approaching the fast lane of my career and I probably should be head of department. The top brass like to see a chap in a suit at the helm. As I'm a fella they know I won't be distracted by my children and whatnot.
Although, if I skip off to go to sports day or whatever all the admin girls will think I'm super sensitive as well as an amazing dad.
Job done.

You're right IfNot
Parenting is much more appreciated when it's done by blokes like us.

Of course, when we mind our own children it's called Babysitting and ringing our mum to come and help is ok

Oh, and Popchyk (Colin)
Word to the wise; I think you'll find Alan Turing way has become one way and as such can't be entered from the Post office side. It's due to folk using it as a rat run to get onto the A97.
Bit of a kick in the balls for Gary (landlord of the Nags head. Nice lad despite being a Chelsea fan)

God its just brilliant suddenly knowing everything all the time! Frees me up from having to actually listening to anyone. No wonder women never get anything done.

Hi boys Chase Bagwell here. So pleased to find this thread. Ive have always known i was a man right from childhood when my favourite toy was a train set a piece of wood and a hammer and nails and my best mates were boys. I was crap at sewing and cooking at school still am but thats great coz DH does it for me (deffo gay eh? )
I have had an excellent morning at work where i have interrupted many conversations between women and shouted over the top of them all in a meeting.

I have been horribly triggered this AM.

Went to the GP for my prostate exam, and the "doctor" refused to indulge me because according to her out of date training, I don't have one, well at least not one like a Man.

I felt crushed and abused, my sense of self invalidated. How dare they only offer this finger bum service to CIS men, clearly a transphobic decision.

We need to address the CIS bias in the medical community. It is so out of date to label organs according to CISnormative ideas of which gender they belong to. CIS men don't own the penis, testicles etc, anymore than CIS women own breastfeeding and pregnancy.

Afternoon lads. Colin here.

I need some brotherly advice.

My gay DH is far too busy with house and children and work to make time for ME. I am simply not a priority any more. And frankly he is looking a bit haggard. I've offered him money to get a makeover and a couple of new tops at H&M but it didn't go down well. I've also said he can have a spa day with his dad but even that was turned down with a weary sigh. Haven't had a shag in days, that's how bad it has gotten.

So I have decided to have an affair with a woman. Then when people find out they'll blame DH for neglecting me and not meeting my needs and the woman for being a slag.

That's totally cool, yeah? I mean what else is a bloke supposed to do in these circumstances? I've practically been forced into it.

You are so right, Colin. Obviously your OH has let himself go, so many cis men do this once they have snared us into marriage and kids.

Have you tried a bit of affection to let him know how much you fancy him? Grab his crotch as he walks past with your laundry, pinch his bum while he's cooking . Men love this, it shows them that they are still desirable even though they are past their best.

My advice is to come out for a few drinks with me and the lads tonight. Text him at 7 to say you are working late at the office. Then when you get home after closing time he will be so pleased to see you, you might get a quick shag.

I'd also like to report yet another assault on my gender indentity by a Southseatern Rail employee who refused to issues me a child's ticket. I am going to stalk him on Facebook and issue death threats. Because that's a reasonable reaction , right?

Hey guys

A big problem here!!! I have been trying to explain to my elderly Irish grandmother that I am now, in fact, a manly man. I must have spent at least seven minutes explaining to her that we can just identify however we want nowadays, but she didn't seem to agree with this and kept asking if this was anything to do with Graham Norton She also tried to deny me my rights of self expression by offering me cups of tea constantly - clearly an attempt to get me to stop telling her all about my mangina!!!

I find this very disappointing. I have left shouting at her that I am going to go no contact and that she should check her privilege as this shit is real!!! I think though she should be subjected to a campaign of hatred and threats so she can get on board with me saying I'm a man just because I want to be? Obviously she can't work social media so if I post her address could all you manly men write to her and tell her what a big horrible bigot she is? Lots of exclamation marks yeah but please use big print coz she can't see too well these days.

Thanks guys I knew I could rely on you, my brothers. God, men are just so great aren't they?

Aren't we great I mean, not they. Shit I slipped up there but it's all the years of social conditioning telling me I was a woman just because I had breasts and a vagina. Huh.

Waste of time trying to explain to your gran, sept. Cis women like her have no clue about our struggles. :(

gynaecologist with cold hands

extra bonus front home

Titus Manhandle

I cannot be the only person man who's recommended this for Classics?

finger bum service

anything to do with Graham Norton

YY I had the same problem when explaining to my neighbour yesterday. We've been friends since she moved here from the Congo in 2004 after her husband and mother were killed because they supported the opposition party.

I was telling her how lucky she was and how trans men like me are the most oppressed of the oppressed but she didn't seem to get it.

Some people are so self obsessed.

Alright, fellow blokes, here's a question:

My moronic subordinates and co-workers are doing my head in today! Can I now yell at them and be considered 'assertive' as opposed to 'bitchy and hysterical' as a man?

I'm hoping it's a yes!

Of course, Bossy. Watch out the women don't become a bit hysterical though - don't want to have to deal with tears and stuff

I've just thought of the most brilliant thing: when enough AFAB start to shrug off the oppressions of cisnormality and recognise their true masculine identity, we will help reduce the percentages of male suicide, male health problems and men forced to live apart from their children.

Go us! We are doing all the things that MRAs want! And reducing male violence along the way. Who could possibly object to our wonderful movement?

The health service will surely welcome us with open arms, as we will be reducing the incidence rate of prostate cancer, heart disease and erectile dysfunction without them having to spend a penny!

Oh go for it bossy mate but if they complain, make sure you say "but I wasn't shouting" and look both terribly outraged and mortally wounded at the same time, yeah?

Yes you're right beyond I shouldn't have wasted my breath, as a cis woman she wouldn't understand and her brain doesn't work as well as mine does, what with me being a man now and all. I think I'll just say, "Look Nana, the struggle is real, but it's OK not to understand

Marquis Rutledge here.

Now I've joined the aristocracy I feel empowered by leaving a trail of dirty balled up socks all the way from the side of the bed to the top of the stairs. Doesn't quite make it to the laundry basket but gay DH is following me tutting loudly and picking up as he goes.

Honestly, it's as if he doesn't know what his role in life is.

Just nipping out now to buy a Porsche. I feel a mid-life crisis coming on.