Male suicide rates

[MissMoneyPlant]

This came up on the MRA thread...

Ok... massively NAMALT (not all men are like that) here, obviously. I know people reading this may have lost perfectly lovely male loved ones to suicide - so please understand I am talking in general terms, not about any one individual.

As someone who struggles with suicidal feelings myself (yes, appropriate people know) and has spoken with many women who are in the same boat... I find some of the stuff said around this subject really misses the point.

I mean - men kill each other, and kill women, right? So it's hardly a surprise that when they deem themselves "lesser" in some way, they kill themselves too. Not that that makes it ok, obviously, but there always seems to be the implication that women are just making a fuss or aren't suffering as much, and I don't think that's true.

Women don't tend to kill their ex partner (and/or children) when in emotional turmoil after a break-up, either. Or any of the other emotionally fraught situations when men act out their feelings with violence.

Mental health services are massively underfunded and dire. People in general are not necessarily very supportive of those with any kind of mental or emotional issues (even "ordinary" life type ones like grief). It's crap for everyone who suffers. But it seems like men collectively matter more because they "shout the loudest" (as it were) by being more likely to kill themselves. Despite more women being diagnosed with mental health issues and seeking treatment, apparently men and women are about equally represented in secondary mental health services. So men are statistically more likely to receive specialist care if they do seek help. I did wonder if this was due to them being more likely to be diagnosed with disorders that include psychosis, but apparently bipolar and schizophrenia are diagnosed roughly the same amount in men and women.

I don't know... it's just really complex, isn't it? But I'm sick of the implication that women who suffer are just making a fuss, and sexism against men supposedly being part of the problem in services etc.

Argh. Sorry if inarticulate.

I honestly do think it is harder for men to seek help when suicidal than it is for women. We have been trained via gender stereotyping throughout our lives to listen to our feelings, to give them some weight and to talk about them. Men on the other hand have been told not to cry and to never appear 'weak'.

On average men have to overcome more stigma to seek help than women....with less emotional literacy to guide them, and weaker emotional support networks.

It is also likely part of it that women have been trained to put the needs of others ahead of their own more thoroughly than men throughout childhood.

It all adds up to a situation that makes it more likely that women will cling on, (but also recover) and men are more likely to suicide.

The only person I know to have killed themselves was male, while I've spent so much more time thinking about it than I would like.

to all.