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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Men bashing

512 replies

PirateQueenie · 01/05/2017 14:57

Hi all,

I don't have a real purpose to this thread other than to just voice my confusion and possibly hear some other opinions.

I would identify as feminist - although for want of a better word, I would rather say I'm an egalitarian. I enjoy reading these threads, and comment on some. But what really disheartens me is all the man-bashing Ive seen. I have a male partner who is my world ♥ wonderful male friends and family members, and when I read some of the things on here I can't help but feel very defensive of the men in my life.

Is this the new wave of feminism? Or am I missing something? When I was growing up (with my mum as an avid feminist), I never heard "men this" or "men that" it was always about how women can strengthen and empower themselves WITHOUT putting men down.

OP posts:
WellErrr · 04/05/2017 17:07

I was just about to ask cadno why he frequents this place.

No need though; sillage has answered it -

He doesn't want to "be" on IBTP or Mumsnet's feminism forum, he wants to know he can penetrate somewhere he isn't wanted at his leisure

What a sad act.

GuardianLions · 04/05/2017 17:12

"epidemic" of women yelling at men holding doors open.

Weird that millennials have inherited this urban myth from - what - the 1960s?

Surely there are better tall tales we could make up about feminists by now. Antifeminists clearly have no imagination.

How about "I saw a feminist in a restaurant punch a bloke in the face for offering to pay for their meal..?

Or, "I saw a feminist headbutt a bartender for saying she had a nice smile"...?

HomityBabbityPie · 04/05/2017 17:19

I'm a millennial. I agree it's depressing.

Elendon · 04/05/2017 19:33

The brilliance of feminism is that we figured that out.”

~ Lierre Keith

Yes we did. And shout we will. I will not remain silent.

Elendon · 04/05/2017 19:36

Or GuardianLions

I saw a pregnant woman bash a man over the head with her handbag because he suggested she take his seat on a crowded tube.

MotherPeresA · 04/05/2017 19:41

I understand your position Pirate.

I'm with Camus on this one:

"Every revolutionary ends up becoming an oppressor or a heretic."

It's a sad irony that those working hardest to promote liberty often become extremely controlling; there is ample evidence of this on a great many of these threads.

It is not by chance that it is newcomers that are most aware of this. Whilst many will say that time spent at the frontline will "open your eyes", I suspect that it is actually the opposite.

I've lost count of the number of people that have naively brought their real-life opinion to a forum such as this one, only to be aggressively accused of being a goady fucker and baited into breaking some BS rule or other (see the TAAT comment and the poster that reported you).

These places are cliques and they behave as such.

BertrandRussell · 04/05/2017 19:43

"These places are cliques and they behave as such"

Well, if you mean "this forum has rules......"

RufusTheRenegadeReindeer · 04/05/2017 19:54

I teally don't understand this 'being baited' into breaking the forum rules

Its usually fairly easy to write a post that wont be deleted

RufusTheRenegadeReindeer · 04/05/2017 19:55

Should be really

Obvs Grin

Elendon · 04/05/2017 19:55

You miss quote Camus and that's shameful. Mother

It's not revolutionary to want to vote
It's not revolutionary to want to control how many children you give birth to
It's not revolutionary to want to love the same sex as yourself
It's not revolutionary to want to be paid the same as your co worker

DJBaggySmalls · 04/05/2017 19:56

Cliques are exclusive. But they are defined as close knit groups, so feminism and MN dont fit the criteria. Saying feminism is exclusive is ridiculous as criticizing a trades guild for being exclusive.

BertrandRussell · 04/05/2017 20:02

"'ve lost count of the number of people that have naively brought their real-life opinion to a forum such as this one, only to be aggressively accused of being a goady fucker and baited into breaking some BS rule or other (see the TAAT comment and the poster that reported you)"

I've lost count of the number of times I've read posts like this without any examples of what the poster means at all.............

BertrandRussell · 04/05/2017 20:04

Interesting that wanting to have control over your own body, or equal pay or not to be raped or hit or murdered is considered revolutionary........

Moussemoose · 04/05/2017 20:13

BertrandRussell
Interesting that wanting to have control over your own body, or equal pay or not to be raped or hit or murdered is considered revolutionary

But it was and still is considered revolutionary. In a totally non ironic way. Therefore the point of the quote stands. MotherPeresA I share your opinion.

RebelRogue · 04/05/2017 20:22

Mother as a newbie (by Mumsnet and this forum standards) I disagree.
I still remember one of the first threads i dipped my toes in. Think it was about prostitution and i was on the wrong side of it. I had arguments and everything and a conviction in my opinion. It didn't last long as a lot of posters went through the effort to explain their points,add links and research,make sensible and reasonable argument for every "but..but..but.." i had,and i started to see and understand what they mean and why they feel the way they do.
I did feel out of my depth(and still do many times), as the majority of the poster are better informed,more coherent and way ahead of me but i have never felt bullied,ridiculed or excluded. So I stuck around,still have my "but..but..but.." moments and the same posters are still replying with well reasoned,patient responses.

BertrandRussell · 04/05/2017 20:22

MotherPeresA I share your opinion."

Which of the poster's opinions do you share?

cadnowyllt · 04/05/2017 20:27

I was just about to ask cadno why he frequents this place.

No need though; sillage has answered it

I'm pleased your content with her answer, because I wasn't going to concede to your sense of female entitlement anyway.

WellErrr · 04/05/2017 20:33

👍

Xenophile · 04/05/2017 20:38

I'm quite interested in the idea that a real live opinion brought in by a new poster should carry more weight than the opinions of women posting on this forum. I'm not sure if you're suggesting that the women here don't live real lives or that well informed opinions are worthless or what.

Maybe you could expand on this for us?

GuardianLions · 04/05/2017 21:55

I saw a pregnant woman bash a man over the head with her handbag because he suggested she take his seat on a crowded tube. Grin

MotherPeresA · 04/05/2017 22:02

My post: I've lost count of the number of people that have naively brought their real-life opinion to a forum such as this one, only to be aggressively accused of being a goady fucker and baited into breaking some BS rule or other.

xenophile - I'm quite interested in the idea that a real live (sic) opinion brought in by a new poster should carry more weight than the opinions of women posting on this forum.

Could you explain where 'carries more weight' comes from? You'll see that it's not present in what I wrote. I think this is a very relevant question given the context: you are asking me to justify something I patently didn't say.

MotherPeresA · 04/05/2017 22:37

Elendon

Every revolutionary ends as an oppressor or a heretic

I believe that this comes from The Rebel (1951). You may need to be a little clearer in your attempt to shame me.

BertrandRussell · 05/05/2017 00:22

"I've lost count of the number of people that have naively brought their real-life opinion to a forum such as this one, only to be aggressively accused of being a goady fucker and baited into breaking some BS rule or other."

If there are so many you've lost count it should be easy for you to c&p an example...........

MotherPeresA · 05/05/2017 01:08

Me I've lost count of the number of people that have naively brought their real-life opinion to a forum such as this one, only to be aggressively accused of being a goady fucker and baited into breaking some BS rule or other (see the TAAT comment and the poster that reported you)"

BertrandRussell I've lost count of the number of times I've read posts like this without any examples of what the poster means at all.............

There was literally an example provided in the sentence you referred to!

If you're wishing to argue against my suggestion that this is a dogmatic clique, then your strategy is curious because you're in danger of proving my point. I doubt that I'll need to provide further evidence than the replies my initial post receives.

GuardianLions · 05/05/2017 01:36

What is proving your point?...
You seem to be pretty antagonistic peres.

Do you want to be involved in feminist discussions or do you prefer to just snipe about the discussions other people are having?