Oxford schoolgirl abduction didn't happen, police suddenly announced

[Yunitsa]

Help, fellow feminists...

I've written a bit on other threads about my daughter (same age) being hugely upset about this abduction and rape. She was cycling along the same street at the same time as it was meant to have happened. As a direct result I've had to go back to giving her lifts to and from school.

This is a name change because it was all just getting a bit close to home/potentially outing.

I've had texts from her already this afternoon... news of this press release must have broken at school. She's confused. The girl was raped but not abducted? Why did she say she was abducted? Is she in trouble? Have the police made a mistake?
And then just now:
Now the police won't believe the next girl who is abducted. Is that right?

And this is before she's seen any of the vitriol that has already begun on social media... schoolgirls should never be believed, apparently; it wasn't rape either, more than likely, she just changed her mind after a threesome. - vomit.

Anyone got any words of wisdom? I have to pick her up shortly and I have no idea what to say. I'm really shaken by this. Though also, of course, kind of glad that the abduction didn't take place and that my daughter might start to feel safe to travel alone again.

link here

Frustratingly the press release on TVP's website is now showing as having an orator and not loading. (It was working an hour ago.) Like more confusion is needed here.

I didn't mean to promote anyone I was just angry. Victim blaming and doubting is so commonplace. So hope the girl has lots of love and support around her.

There was also a sexual assault on a woman walking home in Oxford by two men the Saturday before this incident. Their description was similar to these men, although I read police say they haven't found any link, but either way there are those two attackers out there as well who haven't been caught.

I'd also report the person who works with children who liked memes about this, how utterly vile. Anyone who created or shares memes about this case is disgusting. That's what society thinks of women and girls.

Looks like this person has been courting controversy for some time now.

www.theguardian.com/uk/2013/mar/13/police-blogger-quits-pressure-unofficial

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Police_Inspector_Blog

everydayhypocrisy.wordpress.com/2012/06/13/inspector-gadget-his-blog-and-his-disciples-the-true-face-of-uk-police/

"please anyone in Oxford challenge victim blamers you come across."

Good point. OP, that is another thing you might discuss with your daughter. I expect there will be gossip about this at her school, especially if any of the kids are acquainted with the girl who was raped.

You might talk to your dd about how devastating that gossip will be for the girl if it gets back to her. And even if it doesn't get back to her, think about the effect which victim-blaming has on everyone who hears it. All the kids overhearing it will be absorbing the message that the girl deserved to be raped, and that there's no point reporting a rape because people will only say vicious things about you.

Perhaps your dd will feel able to speak up when nasty things are said. Maybe she won't; that can be hard to do at school. If she isn't bold and outspoken enough to challenge other kids publicly, at the very least she may feel able to say privately to a few of her most trusted friends that it's horrible for people to say such things. That way she can still change some opinions and reassure a few other girls that somebody will be on their side if ever anything bad should happen to them - or if anything bad already has happened to them which they haven't felt able to disclose.

What slender said. And, I'm not sure a 14yr old should be able to 'consent' to being taken away by older men, in the same way she isn't able to consent to sex while under age. A younger child who is tricked into leaving with someone they shouldn't is still classed as abduction.

If someone took my child somewhere I didn't want them to go, without my consent, to do something that is not in their best interest, I would count it as abduction.

This poor child. To comfort your daughter though, OP, at least there was no 'snatching in broad daylight'.

I agree pklme. It's one year ago today that Kayleigh Heywood, who was 15, met a man who had been grooming her online, all the vile victim blamers should think of that case. Whatever happened here this is a 14 year old girl who was put in a terrible situation by adult men and went through an awful ordeal. It's horrible to think anyone is blaming her when she needs love and support. I hope the perpetrators are caught soon.

Stranger Danger stories draw (and have drawn) society's attention away from where most abuse happens: at home, in church, in schools, and cases like Oxford & Rotheram. My girls walk to school and after this story I got the fear. But its almost totally unfounded. We need to expend efforts proportionate to the actual risk, so we protect more children while not needlessly restricting their lives.

You're right about where abuse occurs, User, and you're also right about stranger danger campaigns masking that.

She was abducted, but not in the physical sense.

Given the recent damning of how the police look into sexual abuse, I think a sea change is needed.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-38094096

Whilst the link does condemn the Met, I feel this could be applied across the board, with a few exceptions.

Wonder what happened with this case?