AIBU to see sexism wherever I go

[FedUpWithJudgementalPeople]

My gym: all these massive muscle men don't bother to tidy their massive weights away. This annoys me because I want to use the weight bar but I'd struggle to get their massive weights off it. Instead of thinking that the guys who do this are just inconsiderate twats I've started to seethe about male entitlement. These guys assume anyone using the weight bar will be big massive men like them and therefore don't give a second thought to smaller lighter people ie mostly women who might want to use them.

I think it's sexism and inherent male entitlement but my friends says I am over thinking it and BU.

But whilst we are on default configurations, the default is male in most situations (I'm particularly thinking of the workplace here) and anything women want is seen as a change to the confiig rather than that being the default config.

No, it's not girly mode. It's leaving the weights as they are meant to be left.

Well how is not doing that a) a feminist issue or b) sexist then ffs !?

Because it disproportionally impacts women.

and are we only asking men or would we also ask strong women to put the weights back as well ? There are plenty women who can lift heavier weights than your average man ? How then could this possibly be sexism ??

"Girly mode" because I want them to put their weights away, that has really pissed me offs

YOU are the one who is suggesting that men need to be reminded that weights are left in a configuration that FEMALES can use - do you not see how this will lead to the use of "female" as a pejorative in the gym ?

Some women can lift massive weight, yes. But talking in generalities (as is always the case on an Internet forum) those women are few are fair between in your average amateur gym.

Thus, the thoughtlessness of mainly men disproportionately impacts on mainly women.

It's not a "configuration females can use" it's the fucking configuration they should always be left in.

And we are not asking them to put them back in a configuration that women can use we are asking them to put them back in a configuration everyone can use.

This behaviour is also symptomatic of other behaviour patterns which also disproportionally affect women, hence why it's a feminist issue.

I think it's true, women are much more offended by lack of tidiness than men, but to ascribe intention to this is like saying man fix cars more easily specifically to annoy men, or the only reason women do the laundry better us to assert their dominance over female only spaces....

Yes my tongue is in my cheek!!

A lot of men do think it's 'more masculine' to be a prick. This is part of the disposability/deliberate lack of value men are supposed to show to their considerate side, and helps them feel like a lone wolf for whom all is unnecessary except them being a prick. Its the same behaviour that causes fag packet film to be ostentatiously dropped on a pavement, or those twats who throw coppers away from change to show how little they care for money. Interesting that often that 'don't care' behaviour doesn't usually turn into 50cent riches, or armed robbery success as they think, it usually ends up with increased self disregard, and starting around picking up those same pennies and fag ends discarded by the next generation of patriarchy damaged men.

Just for info, the only time I've personally come across a woman leaving used sanitary protection laying about, it was symptomatic of a serious mental health problem.

You have obv not been to either nightclubs, festivals, or motorway service stations!

Not having bins available/overflowing bins is not what is being discussed here. Sorry you can't tell the difference.

Don't twist it then answer your own twist. I've cleaned that sort of thing up even when there have been empty bins. And empty bins don't mean you have to stick them to the mirror.

I dont think this is really about men. Its about 'people'.
Some are considerate some are not. No matter what sex you are.
I think OP you are thinking of yourself as some poor hard done by female. Just because the heavy weights were not removed.

At the end of the day men are physically stronger than women. If the man never bothered removing the heavy weights for the next female that comes along is it really a big deal and sexist. I go to the gym a lot. This happens a lot. If a woman is struggling to remove heavy weights she just asks someone to do it. Usually a man. And they are normally happy to oblige. All gyms are the same. Its no big deal, just ask for help if you need it. I do.

What about the "socks next to the laundry basket/cup next to the dishwasher" threads on here?

Velvet, this is a residents gym - chances are OP will be the only person in there at times, or there may be one or two others who are also not strong enough.

There are no staff whose job it is to tidy up after inconsiderate people who can't be bothered.

I am not attempting to twist anything Lanark, I leave that sort of shenanigans to others. I was stating a professional opinion. I'm so sorry that doesn't fit in with your view.

Which profession? Sanitary product behaviouralist?

Mental health, Lanark.

Still sniping? Oh dear!

No just interested, its odd that you would imply that women are never untidy unless they are mental. I know definitions of mental ill health are getting very wide, but if that is the professional view, it seems highly restrictive, and in fact, quite dangerous.

Even if it were just men - it's inconsiderate because it assumes that the person after them is as strong as they are. That might not be the case.

No, that's not even a credible definition of my comment. Why don't you go back, read it again, have a think and then come back.

Not sure what you think you're trying to prove here Lanark, but you're not acquitting yourself well. I was addressing a single point made sometime upthread and not made by you. It's not possible to extrapolate that to my believing that women are only 'messy' if mentally ill, unless that's a point you wish to make.

So, for clarity. Women and men are generally messy/untidy for many reasons. Your attempt to imply that anyone sensible would think that that is grounds for belief in mental illness is groundless.

What about the "socks next to the laundry basket/cup next to the dishwasher" threads on here?

I haven't seen these. I assume it's threads complaining about men doing this? In my house the person complaining is my husband. And he'd be delighted if cups made it as far as next to the dishwasher. Is it sexism, or just that outside of work I'm lazy and very untidy (and work much longer hours than him?)

Palmer, I am not quite sure how you have come to the conclusion that I think of myself as a poor hard done by female to be perfectly honest.

Because I have said something that from this thread it seems other women are thinking too? That's being hard done by is it?

Often I will be in the gym alone so it's not always possible to ask for help. Also I do really want to have to ask for help, I want them to stop leaving the weights out in the first place.

Interesting that at least two posters have now suggested that I should modify my behaviour to accommodate for men acting selfishly.

I don't really want to ask for help - apologies for typo