Feminist pub XIX: The Bluestocking meanders into May

[YonicScrewdriver]

We're running at about six weeks per pub at the moment! So if you want chat with a feminist flavour, or with fellow feminists, or just want to admire our patriarchy blaster cannon and goat - welcome!

Last pub Here

LOL kickass - "wedding" = "ordeal". My sentiments too! People were quite offended. They said "public statement of this or that" blah blah blah "best day of your life" blah blah blah and all they got was a death stare.

Budgie smuggler .

When are we getting pictures of pluto?

I have some lovely photos of my mother at my wedding, looking like she'd been sucking on a lemon. We had a very low-key civil affair, didn't even get new clothes for it. Biggest cost was the meal afterwards. It all very clearly was not to my mother's taste,which looking back I'm quite pleased about , since she's not my favourite person, but the couple of friends we had there said it was the best one they'd been to - more focussed on essentials.

Sadly it doesn't surprise me all that much to hear someone complaining about you not being given away. Some things and people are improving,but some others are really kicking hard back the other way. I've never forgotten overhearing 2 incredibly stupid young things at work a few years ago discussing how "nice" it would be for their boyfriends to ask their fathers for permission to wed. I really wish now that I'd followed my instinct of storming over, slapping them round the face with a wet haddock (or suitable alternative nearby reality check) and demanding whether they really really wanted their fathers and their daughter's father's, and anyone else's fathers, having the right to determine women's sexual partners and activity, which would be the natural next step.

We can never stop fighting can we!

Girl Congratulations.

Books about pregnancy for men - firstly how is that different from books about pregnancy for women? Secondly, "Let me google that for you". 'Nuff said.

They said "public statement of this or that" blah blah blah "best day of your life" blah blah blah

I bloody hope not. DP and I are off to Slough registry office (also bingo hall and god knows what else if I'm remembering correctly) to get hitched as a paperwork exercise.. I'll put on a clean t-shirt in the morning, but I can't promise it'll be clean by the time we do it (both DSes are convinced my clothes double as napkins - despite my shrieks that they can just get a tissue)

Congrats, Girl! What a daft comment about the books. IME they come in two flavours - the useful ones which can equally be read by both sexes, and the useless ones which should be read by neither - Miriam Stoppard, I'm looking at you (handy hints on how to do your makeup so your husband doesn't feel like you've let yourself go and are therefore neglecting him).

congratulations to Chunky as well, and a big high five for the idea that we can all get married in whatever style we want. If I ever did it again (really cant' imagine that happening, particularly as I'm married) I would completely have control over it, and only do the stuff I wanted. I always liked the idea of getting married in secret then throwing a huge surprise party after, where we'd break the news. for me, wedding = personal stuff, emotions and what have you, no need for public display. Party = fun, and wedding an accepted excuse for one.So I'd do the wedding in secret, and have abig party for the fun of it. I'd also probably wear bright red, or black.

My dad walked me down one aisle and DH's mum walked him down the other (circular church and we arranged the chairs like that). We walked in to O When The Saints.

Lol thanks all - it really is a paperwork thing though - personally I think that 10 years, 6 countries, a house and 2 kids are much more of a commitment than us both signing some forms to make sure everything is as easy as possible if either of us should pop our clogs - but I'm romantic like that :P

Since titles just came up - I've been doing the kids passport forms, and rather weirdly, I was required to select titles for them - but there's no evidence of them in the passports themselves. Very odd I thought.

I quite liked the free big purple book of pregnancy that was given out when I booked in with DS1 (and the slightly cheesier Canadian version I was given when I moved there). Sure, it was a bit cartoony, and simplified in places, but generally it covered everything in just the right amount of detail without any opinions.

Having two completely different children I can't imagine how many opinionated books I'd have to read before I found the right technique for each of them.

School holidays. >

Ha - I feel your pain LordC

DD complained about her activity course - apparently it isn't as good as another one she's previously been on (which isn't running this week - hence the alternative course).

Thread dropped off my " threads I'm on" list again, grrr.

Congrats chunky. Dh and I got married after 12 years together, registry office, just dh, dd and I, pint and pie at local pub after, then grocery shopping at asda on way home :)

People assumed we did it that way due to lack of funds, when actually it's what we wanted. If I had all the money in the world, I'd not change anything. We told nobody, my Mum knew I'd always do it that way, so she wasn't surprised and she understood why, everyone else wasn't too pleased.

INicked I would have been pleased - I don't like going to weddings! If my friends got married without inconveniencing me that's very nice.

Foxtrot We've only booked one week of activities. I'm relying on minecraft and outdoors while I work.

I'm so lucky to have the holidays off with the kids. I'm not even going to say I do any work in the hols cos I don't, I work really hard in term time and spend the holidays however I like I really sympathise with everyone who needs to pay for some sort of childcare for the holidays, it gets really expensive and the kids don't always enjoy it.

Our holiday plans got derailed by DH having a recurrence of a hernia (we should have been doing watersports in Turkey right now). However, he's on the mend after op last week, and having DD at home so far is a boon - they're playing nicely together building robots.

In light of the recent threads about women in sci/eng, you lot may appreciate a totally unstealthy boast that she's been awarded an awkwright engineering scholarship. It's a few hunded quid for her and the school (enough to fund some electronics projects and buy a black&decker workbench, surely what every 16yo wants at the start of the hols) and I think some sort of work experience.

Well done Errol's DD!

That's fantastic Errol. I tried to encourage DD1 into STEM as she was interested but she got discouraged by the male tutors at the college she would've gone to. She's now self employed, making bespoke lingerie by hand and selling vintage items of lingerie. She enjoys it but finds it hard as a young mother.

Well done Errol's DD! That sounds great.

It seems that Amnesty might not have been completely honest when they drafted their sex worker men's access to women's bodies for money policy. Now, who saw that coming?

here

Just popping in for a swift half while I can still afford it . The Government has asked all departments to scope 40% cuts and what the impact would 'look like' (like the end of meaningful public services, what do you think it would fucking look like?). I'm in central government, in a non ring fenced department and DH in local government. If we both come through this with a job, even with a pay cut freeze for 5 years we will be lucky.
I'm basically a paper pusher, though a good one but DH does a job which actually helps vulnerable people and makes society better and safer. It makes me that this is seen as valueless or expendable.