Feminist Pub 15: The Bluestocking hangs up its, err, stocking and hopes for a chatty Christmas and a Feminist New Year

[YonicSleighdriver]

Festive greetings!

This is the 15th incarnation of the Pub and is meant as a place to drop by with random thoughts and meandering chats, on feminist or other related themes. Anything you want to mull over but not necessarily start a thread about. Alternatively, get some booze and snacks and hang out! Lurkers, newbies and oldbies welcome.

We have a pub goat, a feminist cannon for firing at crazy sexists and we cheer each other up when patriarchy grinds us down...

Last pub drinkie linkie:

Pub 14

I'd love to come to a FWR meetup, but I suspect I'm too far North for any meetup to be feasible Could we have FWR North meetup as well as a FWR South meetup?

I hear you Fib. I don't even notice any more when I'm The Only Woman In The Room, because if I do I get cross. If I pay too much attention to the ways in which I get told every day "you don't belong here" it becomes unbearable.

On the other hand, I've recently taken on a lead role in an IT development team of about 35. Of which 3 are female but at least one of the women (me) is in charge

Dragon.. we could do that, if you want. There must be some more of us north of Watford.

Oh goddess.... why would you do that to me? I've only just got used to the last round of NCs

Think I'm across the Pennines from you Kim

Good news, Kim

Penguins I have felt the same today, a combination of horror/sadness about the attack in Pakistan and wandering around Tescos buying all the stuff that we don't need and knowing half the world is destitute in comaprison.

Jeanne what unfeeling friends you have!! Don't have they have the sensitivity to realize that you might be upset when you have to contact an ex??

I am finding the stress of organising and hosting Christmas plus working quite a lot of hours plus looking after the kids (4) and trying to keep on top of the house is all taking its toll this year. I haven't done the "extras" like cards for years, I just can't cope. I used to love Christmas but, ever since I became a single parent 6 years ago, the magic has faded. Once all the preparations are done, though, I do love the day itself.

Yay! more Northeners !! I'm way far North, almost in Scotland.

I'm north too it would be great to meet up!

The stats are totally depressing.

Yes - our company stats are pretty much average, about 23%. But that's because HR is more or less 50:50 (I think it's actually about 49:51), but the techier the department, the worse the figures; I think our division is something like 8%, and there are some departments which have no women at all. The women who are there are really good in the main - of course they are; they're mostly way more qualified than their male colleagues. (I should be saying we, not they. It's depressing sometimes how I fit all the stereotypes.)

(I can't cope with NCs either.)

I realized years ago that when I'm at work I just think of myself as 'teacher' rather than make or female. Obviously I'm still aware that in female, but doing my job is forefront in my mind. It means that n meetings I think I come across as pretty neutral and harder to treat like a woman.

Skulks in. Southily.

Oh, I could happily do north - maybe York? If there were time to plan.

rosa - they're not being unfeeling. It's the first-world problem of amicable divorce. Everyone assumes it's fine.

fib, I loved that Vogue article! In fact it (almost) restores my faith. I bought Vogue from when I was 17, and I remember how glamorous it felt (I remember the precise smell of the first ones I bought, which had those teeny sample sachets of a particular perfume - no idea what it was but I'd know the smell again). And then I got progressively fed up that it was just so patronizingly stupid and so anti-feminist.

(Husband having a work crisis so he's been up all night and so have I)

Jeanne, Vogue US has been very good recently. I've given up on buying any UK magazine lately, but the American ones have really stepped up their game in a bid to stay relevant against online free content.

Ah, I might try it, then.

Sorry about your DH's crisis.

Is ok, comes with the territory of working in IT (I married within my tribe)

Ah. I've just got out of all of that, but I know a bit of it from my ex.

i'm glad you said that about american vogue. I kind of have the feeling that although the actual set up of society isn't any more equal, there is a much greater awareness of the issues and an ability to talk about them. But I also realize that I live in a bit of a left wing liberal bubble so have a very skewed idea of what the rest of America is like. I suspect that Vogue is aimed at the kind of left wing liberal women who I socialize with, so I'm just experiencing more of the same. Still, I know that conversation in rl with people seem to have much greater feminist awareness than straying onto most general discussions here.

Just watching good morning Britain and sweet little choir, at the end Ben shepherd pipes up special mention to (boys name) I was then expecting some thing special like raising money for cancer or something. But no he continues 'the one young man with all those girls

I hadn't even twigged there was only one boy and why does he need special mention?!

I must be hard for him to cling on to his masculinity surrounded by all that femininity

Kickass my american colleagues (male and female) at my previous job were very aware of the differences in entitlement and discrimination laws between themselves and European colleagues (mat leave, flexible working etc). We had some really interesting discussions as they were very clued up as you say. But it was an internationally-focused industry which generally appeals to the liberal-minded so as you say perhaps a self-selecting bunch

Goodness - we seem to almost all be either Academics or in IT (I love the vagary - so used to having to tell people what I do, who don't really understand whatever I say, so I default to that)!

I walked into an interview yesterday at a hip new startup, the room was almost entirely women - great I thought! Then I met my interviewers, my possible colleagues, both blokes. Women in IT are just spread so thin.

York sounds good to me!

I'm neither in academia or IT, but it's fascinating to hear about everyone's experiences, as it's an avenue of life I'm otherwise never exposed to. Means I haven't much to contribute though (unless anyone wants to talk about feminism on the dole).