Feminist Pub 14: The Bluestocking, a place for feminist chat and feminists to chat

[YonicScrewdriver]

Welcome!

This is the 14th incarnation of the Pub and is meant as a place to drop by with random thoughts and meandering chats, on feminist or other related themes. Anything you want to mull over but not necessarily start a thread about. Alternatively, flop onto the chaise lounges with some

We have a pub goat, a feminist cannon for firing at crazy sexists and a variety of drinks and snacks. And stools/bar counters at female friendly heights. And a crèche in the back somewhere

Will link the last pub in the next post!

That's exactly what it is, Sabrina Of Many Ns. He will of course now bitch and whine that she's denying contact. And in the meantime, it's his poor gorgeous boys who are caught in the middle. He's such an arse. I was delighted when she kicked him out, not least because I didn't have to be polite to him any more. I've always hated him. He's one of those people with such tiny self-esteem that they spend all their time trying to make other people feel small so that they can feel bigger. He was always emotionally and verbally abusive, but did resort to physical violence when she kicked him out. She's had him arrested twice.

She's still in the family home, but it's on the market. She's sad about leaving it but can't afford it herself and he's being an arse (what a surprise) about paying the mortgage etc. And he's still on the deeds, which makes him think he's entitled to come in any time to push her around. She's looking forward to getting her own place where he doesn't have any kind of ownership over it. I can't wait until she's free of him properly.

Oh, your poor friend and her DCs, Annie

Hope things work out very soon for her, has she thought of a non-molestation order? If the police have had to be called, she can show a history of DV and might even be one of the lucky (?) ones who can get legal aid?

She did have some kind of order or another against him last time he was arrested - he wasn't allowed back near the house and has been at his mum's ever since, I think it was a condition of bail. But he seems to be allowed back in again now. I also don't know about legal aid, but she definitely has a solicitor.

Mostly she can see right through his BS and thinks it's more annoying than anything else, but I know she's (quite rightly) raging that he brings the boys into it.

Hello! Lots of posts! Happy birthday buffy! Been out and about. Will catch up later.

Funnily enough, Annie, my friend's shit-xh went to a solicitor and threatened her with 'court' and a 'contact order'. She says, yeah - bring it on (but obvs not in those exact words!). Because she knows she's being reasonable - and he's an abusive arse. And she has all the vile, threatening e-mails he's sent her. She has never been anything other than polite and accommodating about his contact.

Strangely, his emails have been a lot more polite since he consulted a solicitor. Oh, and he's not taking her to court anymore. Arse.

Hello All.

More abusive arsehole men who are being divorced. Good for your friend Annie in protecting herself and her DC. for the arsehole XH.

And not surprised at the abusive emails sent to your friend Sabrina. Through recent events, I have come to conclusion that men simply hate to feel they are 'losing' against a woman, and will do anything and everything (including physical violence and breaking the law, if you hang around the relationships board) to reassert their 'dominance'. Talk about control freakery!

Someone pour me a stiff one. I'm printing things out and getting my paperwork in order before I head off to London tomorrow morning. My viva is on Tuesday morning, and even though I live in easily commutable distance I have decided to cloister myself in a Traveldodgy for the day before.

I am beginning to shit bricks. The big grey breeze-block kind.

Good luck, annie!

It will be fine. It will.

Good luck Annie.

All shall be well, and all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well.

Lovely quotation, puffins.

It's my go to quotation in times of trouble. I have a thing about mystical anchorites

I'm sure you'll be great Annie

Good luck Annie!

Good luck Annie

As who doesn't, puffins?

Good luck Annie!

This morning: declutter before work. From now on anyone coming to our house with a baby will just have to sort out sitting arrangement themselves. It's ridiculous to have a high chair in a house with primary school-aged children...

hi,

just checking in and marking my place. I have been nowhere and done nothing for several days, due to nasty flu, and have no words of wisdom or advice either.

Good luck Annie.

Best of luck Annie!

Three bags of shoes/clothes/toys sent away. :)

Now to work.

But I'm hungry ...

Buffy belated happy birthday wishes

I've been thinking about your posts on positivism and epistemology which have really made me think about the way I think about things (IYSWIM). I've started a thread in Feminist Theory with some questions about statistics and evidence for feminist issues and I'm hoping you and other good thinky thinkers from FWR might have a look.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/feminist_theory/2243549-Evidence-basis-for-feminism

Thanks for the good wishes, all. I am now safely ensconced in my Traveldodgy room, getting maximum value from their £3 wifi by streaming Spotify! I am also sitting here in my pants (which I'm sure you all needed to know) because I only brought one pair of trousers and I got mud all over them on the way here. I don't think muddy trousers is a good viva look! So they have been washed in the sink and are happily drying out. Good times.

Right, time to crack on and fill my head with knowledge.....

Good luck with the viva Annie.