Girls beating up boys

[Plymouthsupporter]

Has any girl on here ever beat up a boy?

im not straw manning, messy. RTT. It's exactly what was said.

I feel like OP is up there dangling us like puppets on a string whilst throwing his head back and laughing maniacally!

Still I must go, DS is demanding I get out of bed ....

But most teenage girls don't talk to adults about creepy guys or how to deal with them, or at least they didn't when I was growing up. How to deal was learnt from each other as part of that teen subculture thing.

How should girls deal with creepy guys then, I guess is the million dollar question, taking into account what is realistic for them etc

Guidelines for our work for unwanted attention was just to say

"Your attentions are unwelcome"

I wouldn't like to see a teenager using anything particularly provocative like fuck off etc. in case it escalated the situation.

I'm totally on board with the idea that girls and women of all ages shouldn't be harassed in the first place.

But if this is a phrase that's mainly used by teenage girls, I think it's even worse - sexism is insidious and it's another tiny message to girls and women that their bodies are commodities, because it's what they hear and are ironically enough taught to use to repel pervs.

Seven - I asked DD what she would say. She said "yeah like you're so sexy" and that was said with an eyebrow lift and a fuck off and crawl back under your rock drawl.

Messy, I quite like that it's derailed into an interesting and useful (for me, anyway) discussion.

That's not realistic for a teenage girl, for a number of reasons.

That's also bizarre for work, if you are being sexually harassed then official guidance should be to report it. whether that is realistic or not is again a question but official guidance should be report it surely.

Why is is not realistic for a teenage girl to say something along those lines?

And yes of course it was to report the matter, goes without saying.

Really? So what my DD says she says isn't realistic?

In work is not the same as being catcalled in the street. In work it is unlikely to be a young teenager, they are going to be 16, and probably 18 and there will be formal procedures in place.

I don't actually think it's bizarre, it's a firm way if letting the individual know they are not behaving appropriately before you can take it further. As often the excuse is in situations that the perpetrator has some notion they are banging in be perfectly acceptable fashion.

PS. Good luck with your girls Sanity. You could always teach them to swear in French! A good ole "va te faire foutre!" whilst waving your hand is not only elegant but is also educational and makes the creepy man feel like uncultured beast...

...unless you're in France of course!

Which comes back to, how do you change it, how do you stop them.

You'd need to get into schools I think?

I'm not sure that telling girls to say " your attentions are unwelcome" is going to work.

And I'm still really uncomfortable with the girls behavior being the side that is criticised in these encounters.

If horrible men didn't proposition teenagers, this phrase wouldn't be used.

My teenage girls talk to me about this stuff, all the time, Seven.

But I have never suggested that teenage girls be berated for their use of language, just that their parents could, perhaps assist them in finding better language.

And the whole discussion started when AsAMan, who, presumably, is not a teenage girl, used this language. And was asked to consider the language she used.

To clarify (again!) I asked her what she would say if some random man shouted sexual comments at her in the street, not what she would say if she were being sexually harassed in work.

No one is critiquing the girls behaviour, not one person.

I thought we were having a discussion about what would be a good thing to do in the event you are in a situation with a mans unwanted attentions.

Me too Jassy . God you lot are a like an elastic band, pulling me back ....

I only mentioned work as it was in some HR guidelines.

That is what whatever you say is intended to get across to the man anyway. Go away I do not want to engage with you.

Obviously you would also tell a teenager as well as a work colleague to report it as soon as possible, but when you are in that situation it might be a useful thing to say, that's all.

The idea of finding "better language" for girls to use when adult men are trying to get into their knickers is just alien to me.

I will be telling my children that they don't have to watch their p's and q's when dealing with scum like that.

DD's "yeah like you're so sexy" seems to have worked ok for her so far. It's empowering her and belittling the males, who are the ones who are doing the harassing.

And we do talk about this kind of stuff and I am aware she has been cat called.

Seven you said "how should girls deal with creepy men then"

Which is what we are discussing.

DD1 has just been on a French exchange, messy. The French students find it hilarious that they would say fuck if they dropped something, whereas for them, the correct response would be "putain" which, of course, translates as "whore".

But most teenagers don't say things like " I don't want to engage with you" that isn't how they use language.

You need to be realistic with what they will or they won't do, for them to take on board what you are telling them.

No, Seven, if they are being cat called in the street, they say things like "yeah, like you're so sexy" with an eyebrow lift and a fuck off drawl.

FrauHelga: Your first post on this thread seemed quite aggressive to me, especially ending it with "it fucking well is offensive".

It seems odd that you would challenge AsAMan in such a robust manner, but then complain when other people challenge you that you are being "shot down".

And we still don't even know for sure what AsAMan really meant.