Would you get rid of the titles "Miss" and "Mrs" and use just "Ms" if you could?

[peppaistired]

I would like to campaign somewhere about this. I don't see the point in having so many titles around for women, and only one and simple for men: "Mr"
After all, why should people or society care if we're married, or single? They don't seem to care in the case of men, why is there still an issue with women's marital status?

Sorry, I was reading a different post.

Who says women who are not married are any less worthy of respect?

Much of society, including institutions like banks - see BlueKarou's post, for example. Women are judged on whichever title they opt for, like it or not. Much of the time it's not even conscious. It's just the society we grew up in has certain associations with particular words - for example, "miss" is either childlike or youthful and marriageable or past it? on the shelf, old maid, spinster.

Men never have to go through this. They are manly men all the way through, and it matters not a jot whether they sre or ever have been married, unless they take the active decision to tell someone.

Actually, I was brought up to address letters to men as "John Smith, esq." "Mr. J. Smith" was only for trade. So some things have changed for men.

Also, I now feel the need to point out that I wasn't actually born in the 19th Century...

Even if being married isn't seen as somehow better or more worthy or respect, the question is why women should have to reveal that information, or clearly mark themselves as choosing not to by using Ms, when men do not.

Yes I do not understand the need or want for declaring your status to all and sundry.

there are lots of things people do that I don't understand, like cleaning the car, cleaning their tack every time they ride, watching Downton Abbey, complaining about being fat but taking no exercise or dietary measures to address it

people are weird but that's ok isn't it

outs post wasn't nasty.

"I'm proud to be a Mrs and feel people afford me more respect once they know I'm married. You may not like it but that's just how the world is."

"Hate Ms .Probably because when I was younger only raving feminists and lesbians used it"

^^ If that doesn't explain why having one female adult title would be best, I don't know what will.

I have all 3 on various things. I always 'tick' Ms and I say 'Ms' but hate enforcing it due to the confusion (Miss/Ms - Muhzzzzz) & looks you get. That 'Oh, you're one of those' vibe (cat loving spinster/ardent feminist/lesbian) not that there's anything wrong with any of those things, they just don't describe me. However, on the back of this thread I will be stronger about using it in the face of adversity!

Yours
Ms ChillingGrinBloodLover

It occurred to me, that companies like us revealing our gender and marital status because of online profiling and marketing.

I'm not fond of Miss, Mrs or Ms. I usually choose 'Lady' if forced to pick something (though have also been known to pick some more esoteric ones too...).

I'd prefer to not have a title at all.

Personally I'd like to see all titles scrapped, I think this is the direction things are heading in anyway.

At work everyone's email signatures are: firstname surname, job title, contact details. People do use the title dr (as having a phd is relevant), but never mr. There is one woman who is: mrs firstname surname, which just comes across as a bit unprofessional, like she's bringing her homelife into work, no-one needs to know, or cares, whether she's married.

If I am asked what title I go by I say Mrs. If I am not asked and Ms is used, I am not fussed. If I was unmarried and Mrs was used by assumption I might be a tiny bit bothered but to be honest wouldn't get that worked up about it. In my employment, titles are never used.

I have no issue with people using whatever title they want (or none at all), but would be slightly concerned about some sort of campaign to impose the unilateral use of Ms on everybody.

BlueKarou - just a guess but the Dr (Male) and Dr (Female) thing in a house insurance application may be a hangover from the days when insurance underwriters were permitted to make risk assessment judgements for insured parties dependant on gender. Women generally were seen as lower risk and so premiums would be lower. I think they're not permitted to do this any longer (certainly the case for car insurance so presume other insurance too) but they may just not have updated the fields in their online form?

I agree with those who think a gradual change is probably the kindest and easiest way to achieve this - and if, over time, more and more women are choosing Ms, I think it will happen naturally. But trying to impose it will just cause bad feeling, and surely that is counterproductive?

Just take the compulsory field asterix off the title box, for a start.

I'm totally happy to be first name surname, but after 24 years putting Ms rather than Mrs would feel a bit like getting divorced. I'm too old to change the title I've had for over 1/2 my life (and I got married at 22, so I never felt old enough to be an unmarried Ms), but I'd love
My DDs to be free from these labels.

I'm a Mrs. Having changed my name on marriage it would have felt odd not to change the title. The surname I thought about. The title I confess I didn't think about much.

On opening my DD's child ISA I thought very hard however and opted for Ms. What she wants to do when she's older is up to her but I felt Ms gave her options that Miss didn't.

Just take the compulsory field asterix off the title box, for a start.
Yes.

Thanks so much for the comments. It seems as though the majority of women would like have only one choice, but of course, this is a feminism forum, so I'm not too sure what women all around would say.

It's the sort of thing probably most women do without thinking too much a about, they just call themselves Mrs once they get married, because it feels comfortable and the tradition.

I think we should really think about what's really behind those titles, why do we need them nowadays.

I'm married and never for one minute thought of using Mrs. I don't like the meaning of it, that I should tell society my marital status, as if it's got more status than being Ms or Miss. It's silly and it endorses the patriarchy and establishment that oppresses women.

I wish all women who would like to use Ms could make a petition through the right channels to remove the other titles from forms, government, work etc etc.

If men don't need to reveal their marital status, women shouldn't either.

I would agree with making the title box not compulsory, I think being able to opt out of something is better then removing options from people.

I also wonder why every online form ever needs to know if I'm a man or woman, what difference does it make if I'm a woman?

I imagine Ponty so the company owning the form can sell you more stuff.

I would be interested to know how many people who don't like being Ms Ann Smith because they think it indicates a divorcee are happy to call themselves Mrs Ann Smith? Because that really is the traditional form for a divorced woman!

Because Hakluyt I never ever agreed to loose my first name as well as my Surname.

My maiden name is my DDad's and a bit of a pain to spell. My first name is all mine!

If your birth name is your dad's, then your married name is your FIL's.

I suppose so, and looking at it like that, I'd rather have my DDads name than his.

But I got married 24 years ago, I was still a student and both sides of our family are as traditional as you can possibly get. It would have been odd to keep my maiden name.

It's only as I get older, I kind of miss it. With everything done on line, it wouldn't constantly be misspelt, either!

Fair enough!

No. I hate Ms. I am Miss. Then I will be Mrs.

If you were just Mrs when you turned 18, alley, would that suit you?