Would you get rid of the titles "Miss" and "Mrs" and use just "Ms" if you could?

[peppaistired]

I would like to campaign somewhere about this. I don't see the point in having so many titles around for women, and only one and simple for men: "Mr"
After all, why should people or society care if we're married, or single? They don't seem to care in the case of men, why is there still an issue with women's marital status?

[ChillingGrinBloodLover]

Well that was fun. Not.

I was asked today, by a bloke filling a form out online, if I was Miss or Mrs (which he seemed awkward about asking) so I said Mzzzz and he looked at me as if to say 'Yep, figured you'd be single with 6 cats'

I have Miss Ms Mrs on various things.

The sooner something non declarative about my marital status is 'the norm' instead of 'bitter divorcee with cats' the better

[temporaryusername]

Chilling [shocked]

I have decided that next time someone asks me if I am Miss or Mrs I'm just going to say 'no'. They won't ask now, of course.

[temporaryusername]

obviously, or even

[WhoKnowsWhereTheSlimeGoes]

My passport doesn't have a title on it.

I think gradual change is the answer too, but it needs a critical mass of women to want to use Ms and I don't think we're there yet. It is one reason why I keep posting on threads like these to try and raise awareness, I hope that people reading it who have never considered using Ms might start to think about it.

As for making things happen a bit more actively, I would like to see forms changed to only offer Mr/Ms/other as options, so people could enter Miss or Mrs or Lady if they choose, but it would be easier just to check Ms. At the point when children are taught to write formal letters or address envelopes (when they are learning when to use Yours sincerely or faithfully etc) to be taught that men should be addressed as Mr and women as Ms UNLESS you know otherwise for an individual (eg Lord, Dr, Mrs). That sort of thing.

[PumpkinGordino]

Theherb I'm first on our house docs, but my relative did the conveyancing so I don't know whether that made a difference.

[sandgrown]

Sorry Pumpkin I did not mean to sound homophobic .just stating the way things were in the old days and t
Sorry Pumpkin did not mean to offend just stating the way things were.

[sandgrown]

Sorry messed that up!

[AtiaoftheJulii]

Just checked our passports - renewed the entire family in 2011 - and there is nowhere for any title. So if that's the 'most official' ID you can get, and they don't need it, why does anywhere else?

[LittleBearPad]

Just noticed on our new life insurance policy - it's addressed to me first then DH. We share a surname so historical and typical practice I assume would be Mr & Mrs X Name. But nevertheless the computer has been programmed away from. I probably wouldn't have noticed without this thread.

[everydayaschoolday]

The point of having so many titles for women, gives us the option to choose for ourselves how we would like to be addressed. Isn't campaigning to reduce the choice to women about whichever title they would individually prefer to use, contradict feminism?

If you do not want to be 'defined' by your marital status, then use Ms or leave the box blank. Why is this so difficult?

[YonicScrewdriver]

"Isn't campaigning to reduce the choice to women about whichever title they would individually prefer to use, contradict feminism? "

Not every choice a woman makes is a feminist choice.

[everydayaschoolday]

I didn't say it was.

[YonicScrewdriver]

Then what did you say?

[everydayaschoolday]

The point of having so many titles for women, gives us the option to choose for ourselves how we would like to be addressed. Isn't campaigning to reduce the choice to women about whichever title they would individually prefer to use, contradict feminism?

If you do not want to be 'defined' by your marital status, then use Ms or leave the box blank. Why is this so difficult?

[temporaryusername]

everyday, not sure if you have had a chance to read the thread (it has got long) but those points have been addressed in previous posts.

[everydayaschoolday]

Oh, OK then :)

[temporaryusername]

We could answer them again, but I suspect if what has already been written doesn't mean anything to you it won't make much difference. When I say 'mean anything to you' I don't necessarily mean change your opinion, just give you an understanding of another perspective.

[WhoKnowsWhereTheSlimeGoes]

Feminism is about equality. While the majority of women in this country choose to use titles that signify their marital status that imposes an expectation that the rest of us will do the same, I am always being asked "is that Miss or Mrs" by shopworkers, telesales people etc, wasting their time and mine and giving them an indication of my marital status based on my response.

All I want is for women to be treated equally to men who do not get put through this process constantly. I'd be happy to be asked "is that Ms?" and for men to be asked "is that Mr?" so there would still be the option to say "no it's Mrs, Dr" or whatever - I don't want to take away the right to use the non-feminist options, but I would like to see it become the exception not the rule.

[LittleBearPad]

Whoknows an even better question might be 'what's your title?'

[AsAMan]

Whoknows an even better question might be 'what's your title?'

I suspect you'd get too many Jedis. Maybe we should just do away with all but earned titles. (seems unfair for some poor fucker to slog through 8 years of medical school to lose out on their DR status!)

[WhoKnowsWhereTheSlimeGoes]

"What's your title?" would be fine longer term, but until Ms is established as a default I think it needs that nudge in the right direction, at the moment if asked "what's your title" women will still tend to say Miss or Mrs.

I know when I get asked "is that Mrs?" I can't always be arsed to say "no it's Ms" and sometimes just say yes, so I hope it would work in reverse too.

[LividofLondon]

I'd get rid of them. It seems weird to me that it's impossible to tell the marital status of men from their title, yet it is for women. Why?! It didn't bother me at all until I started feeling a bit "left on the shelf" for still being single in my 30s and having the title "Miss". I always felt there were negative connotations to calling myself "Ms" (where I got that I have no idea, but probably forums and media). I used to get asked regularly why I hadn't been "snapped up" so felt a bit defective that I wasn't married. Now in my 40s I realise that I don't want to be married anyway! But I feel too old to be "Miss", so "Ms" it is. I Men don't have this dilemma so why should I!