10 Things moms of boys must do

[ThaneOfScunthorpe]

This has been posted by two people on my social media:

www.scarymommy.com/10-things-moms-of-boys-must-do/

In short: boys are messy, boys are dramatic (it's not just girls who are drama queens, LOL), boys like food and boys like being nude.

So pissed off with shit like this and the thousands of people who 'like' it whose kids are pigeonholed right from birth into messy and rowdy boys or nice, groomed, my-little-pony playing girls.

She has a comments section on her blog. You could post your concerns on there and see what she says. Perhaps she isn't aware of the negative side of what she writes.

I nearly posted something about this earlier. It's really made me feel uncomfortable.

With the best will in the world, posting on here is not going to make the author aware of what she is doing, is it?

Which is why I didn't

Do you think there is any value in contacting authors like the one in the OP?

I did write a comment then managed to lose it. If you look at the post before (the one about mothers' day) she manages not to refer to the fact that her children are boys. The whole article would have been just as funny if she'd replaced the word boys with the word children.

I do think there is value in commenting but think it will probably be greeted with 'killjoy' and humourless'. Got to start somewhere though.

Of course I wrote a comment after the article. But there is a message that says 'please don't comment if you can't add anything to the discussion'. I'm pretty sure my contribution won't be seen as a valuable or constructive one.

This has been pissing me off this morning too. FFS. Have posted a lighthearted "my dd does 1-9 too!". Daren't post anything stronger, as don't want to be seen as humourless. (I am fucking humourless about this though - such bullshit, but so all-pervasive and so unfair on our children. Won't somebody think of the children?!)

i suspect that being a mother to four boys, girls simply don't feature on her radar (event though she is clearly a woman...)

i am giving her the benefit of the doubt and hoping she is referring to boys only - because that is what she knows and she doesn't feel qualified to comment on girls...

I note that someone did point out that their little boy loves cuddles too. At least someone felt the need to say that boys can be sweet and not just rough and tumble smelly things.

I have one of each and can't relate to very much of what she wrote at all.

What do you expect from an idiot who describes the essence of femininity like this:

"Makeup, exfoliation, perfume, cute shoes. Fruity drinks instead of whiskey shots. Risk breaking a nail? No thank you. Bugs and worms: ewwwwww.

3 things mums of boys should do

Feed them
Raise them
Love them

Saw this too, grim but predictable .

At my local childrens centre they have actual "parenting of boys" courses.
Its just bizarre that boys seem to be lumped in as a homogeneous mass of sticky, dirty rudeness and girls as a dramatic pile of glitter and patheticness.

A parallel universe to mine, and I have boys and was raised with brothers.

I saw a comment saying 'don't forget boys give the best cuddles - far better than girls'.

I'm angrier than I should be about this. Possibly because yesterday I was reading a New Yorker article where it stated:

"For example, when women are asked to state their gender before taking a math or science test, they end up performing worse than if no such statement appears, conforming their behavior to societal beliefs about female math-and-science ability."

And this gobsmacking thought has somehow conflated with the 'moms of boys' article which I read shortly afterwards. But it does make sense - if we are strongly reinforcing that 'this is what boys do' from such an early age then there is little hope for our girls to break out of their molds.

New Yorker article if anyone's interested. It's not about feminism, but about people changing ingrained ideas.

1. Teach them that yes means yes.
2. Teach them that if someone doesn't want to play that game, no one plays that game.
3. Buy them a pram and not be surprised when they play with it.
4. Don't teach them to not hit girls, teach them to not hit.
5. Teach them that when they are winding someone up and another parent says "oh he's just being a boy" that that's bullshit.
6. Teach them to cook.
7. Don't let their sister do all the tidying up and give him "Boys chores".
8. potty train them. Because it would be gross not to.
9. Let your husband (if you have one) feed him and do his share of the cooking and cleaning.

10. Teach them to speak up when others are being knob heads.

Off the top of my head anyway. Any others? basically same list as girls

Teach them it's okay to show emotion.

Gender specific lists are dreadful.perpetrating tired gender stereotypes
Teach your kids not to be a git,and you'll no go far wrong

reallyfuckingfedup
thanks for that, I actually thought the thread was going to be a list of things to teach your child to not accept inequality, was very interested in reading someone elses opinion. like yours :)

Teach your kids not to be a git,and you'll no go far wrong

sorted!

My boys know being messy results in privileges being removed. They know to respect women. DS1 is in a relationship and knows that he is responsible for ensuring safe sex (he is 2 years younger than his gf and just turned 16) so he better make sure he doesn't become a father. But my boys also know there isn't a single issue they cannot talk to me or DH about. They know they are loved. And tbh that is the most important thing.

"and you'll no go far wrong"

and you'll not go far wrong

No. I meant and you'll no go far wrong
It needs no correction