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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

Lapdancing and telling off dh's mate.

365 replies

Manchesterhistorygirl · 02/10/2013 17:41

I blame you lot. Thanks.

Last night dh's friend was telling him all about his recent visit to a lap dancing bar. I told him he and his mates were a bunch of twats and I was disgusted at them all, especially since they all have partners.

I also told dh if I ever found out he'd done the same it'd be the absolute last thing he ever did.

So my nest of vipers, thank you for giving me the confidence to handle a situation I've always found disgusting, but wouldn't have ever spoken out about until I joined here.

OP posts:
Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 16:19

Of course on that thread? That's the problem with usernames

SabrinaMulhollandJjones · 03/10/2013 16:24

A calming Brew for yougotbale. I don't know what you're on about.

AnyFucker · 03/10/2013 16:26

Are there some posters who literally lie in wait for these threads so they can deliberately derail them with pedantic wanky shit ? It would seem so, and what a shame that is. Their superior grasp of the English language could have been used much more productively than that.

Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 16:29

Sab - I was on about the difficulty of identifying dawn French on an Internet forum with usernames lol

What is the fluffy kitten thing about? I'm oblivious to its meaning. Please explain

If it's about women being under pressure to pluck. I'm against waxing. Nothing wrong with a bit of fluff

scallopsrgreat · 03/10/2013 16:31

kittens are kittens Yougotbale. Simple as that.

They are cute and fluffy and do silly things which make us smile when all around is going slightly mad

EarthMither · 03/10/2013 16:33

Way to go Yougotmale - highly effective derailing, you clever boy

Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 16:34

I'm allergic to cats. Kittens do malt less (I think).

Remember a cup of coffee is for a break, a cat is for life.

reelingintheyears · 03/10/2013 16:34

Why the would you want/need to identify anyone on a forum.
You interact with the person they are on the forum.

Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 16:36

Earth - it's not derailing. I think the thread would maybe have a more definite path if we heard what this dickhead husband's friend had said in response.

Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 16:38

Reeling - I don't need to identify anyone.

EarthMither · 03/10/2013 16:39

Why is what the husband's friend said important Yougotmale? The OP posted to report what SHE had said. Or don't a woman's words count if they're not contextualised by a male response?

reelingintheyears · 03/10/2013 16:41

I was on about the difficulty of identifying dawn French on an Internet forum with usernames lol

Why do you need to identify her?

The difficulty implies you would like to be able to identify her.

EarthMither · 03/10/2013 16:42

I think it was a piss-poor attempt at humour, reeling

Rowlers · 03/10/2013 16:45

Thread's a bit ruined now.

reelingintheyears · 03/10/2013 16:46

She wasn't asking if she was being U, just chatting and saying how this forum has given her the confidence to speak up when she doesn't like something.

Good on her.

Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 16:47

Earth - if she had just written what he had said the OPost wouldn't have made much sense.
You can assume he would have some sexist views which may have added to points to discuss. I'm interested how the husband reacted.

To answer your question of course woman's words count. In general equally. In this case more so.

For you to ask that question I assume you don't think they are equal? It was a bias question towards your point of view.

EarthMither · 03/10/2013 16:49

Bored now - bye bye Yougotmale. 0/10 for effort btw

Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 16:54

It's yougotbale. It's a spurs thing.

Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 16:55

Earth - 0/10? Please give me another chance to get your approval?

SabrinaMulhollandJjones · 03/10/2013 16:56

OP came on to say thanks to FWR for giving her the confidence to speak up to dickhead friend boasting about antics in lap dancing bar.

So, of course a few goady fuckers had to come along to put her back in her place. Hmm

But thankfully, most of us know that they are goady fuckers who are not very nice, unlike kittens, which are.

ReviewsOffers · 03/10/2013 16:58

Review - lol. It was a joke.

this is what the Bale said way back when when I challenged him on his daft assertion that what OP said was abusive

So I can safely say he's a goady derailer and he knows it.

Ignore shall be my new policy

Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 17:02

That's great. I wish we didn't have to live in a world where people had to seek confidence from a website. We need change this society so no matter what sex, race, age, ability has the confidence not only to speak their opinion but be able to speak out about isms and injustices.

SabrinaMulhollandJjones · 03/10/2013 17:04

Yes, and not be called 'controlling' and stuff by posters like you, bale. That would be nice too.

comingalongnicely · 03/10/2013 17:05

LurcioLovesFrankie - comingalong - in my experience, the sort of man who is enough of a saddo to go to lapdancing clubs will interpret "A bit of a chat, some adult discussion & some pointers to get him thinking" as "some stupid cow swearing & banging on at me" in any case, so you might as well have the catharsis of a bit of swearing (specially if they had the cheek to express these opinions in your own house).

Bit of a big box to put someone in, I still think a discussion is better than rabid abuse TBH. Even if someone has the "cheek" to express an opinion in someone elses house.

Yougotbale · 03/10/2013 17:09

It's a public forum ,sab , I've been called a goady fucker. I don't think that telling people what they can and can't say really the advice the OP used, IMO. That was my view. Silencing people is a bad move, maybe the OP would have confronted with that in mind.