OK. Please can we talk about women raping men?

[curlew]

It's a key part of the MRA agenda. Some MRA even say that men are as often victims of rape by women as women are of rape by men.

I absolutely agree that sex should always be consensual,and if a man has been forced, by either physical or psychological means into sex, then he has been raped and deserved of course to be taken seriously, and for the perpetrator to be charged and ,nif found guilty, convicted. And I know that an erection is a physiological response, and does not necessarily mean that a man actually wants to have sex.

But the MRA are full of stories of men waking up after falling asleep drunk at parties to find women on top of them. And vqriations on th them of being forced to penetrate against their will. And, it might just be my misandry showing, but really? Does this happen a lot? Is it a really serious problem that needs to be addressed, and have equivilant resources given to it?

'It's a shame the stats are quite old and a bit vague etc - it's a shame SF won't share her data with us, but apparently it's fine to quite stats and not substantiate them on the basis that people are "slobs".'

Just shared. Called Sheshelob 'slob' because she/he chose to call me fraude. Childish, but there you go. Can't believe I'm having to explain this.

This would be a dream thread for a 'reasonable MRA' to really explain the issue and get people listening. We were all engaging seriously with some good posts above
Sadly I do think it's like NT said - it's more about hating women than helping men.

One interesting point has been made. That f on m sexual abuse is the flipside of the gender roles, that men are always up for it and would never say no to any sexual contact. A very clear illustration that Patriarchy hurts men too

'Oh, just ignore her, FGS. How many important topics does she have to crayon all over before she is ignored? I know the truly knowledgable women on here attempt valiantly to engage with each and every hairy handed bridge dweller in order to try and teach them something, but surely there is a limit?'

Yep, I just linked you to a reputable source, a lesbian magazine with actual testamonies and stats, nothing to do with MRA anything, but you know fucking better and I'm a troll.

AHEM

SF that article says that this crime is uncommon. The people who say 1 in 3 cite no source, and say it just after saying "The Santa Fe Rape Crisis and Trauma Treatment Center is among many around the country to acknowledge that while same-sex rape comprises a small percentage of rapes overall, it does in fact exist."

It's also an article not a source like BCS or similar. It is a 3rd hand quote and it doesn't say where from.

I read in cosmo about 15 years ago that 7 in 10 men would rape if they knew they would get away with it. I could plaster that all over the boards, if I wanted. But I don't because, erm, it was an unsubstantiated headline in cosmo. And if I did do that, I would expect people to ask where I got that stat from then I'd look like a bit of an arse when I said "cosmo about 1997" wouldn't I.

I'm not very impressed with your posts.

Is that your idea of hard statistical evidence?

Oh come on.

'Is that your idea of hard statistical evidence?

Whats your idea of it?

I am also REALLY uncomfortable with this idea of trying to force a conversation which is rather offensive frankly.

The implication is that feminists don't care about victims of sexual violence if unless they are female victims of male violence. This is cobblers. And the changes that are being fought for will benefit all victims of sexual violence.

So ner.

Well, not an unattributed source 3rd hand in a magazine.

An Overview of Sexual Offending in England and Wales released by the ONS in January 2013

I haven't trawled through it yet, though!

Very interesting thread, Curlew. I had been wondering about the assumption that men always have to be seen to be 'virile' and 'manly' or whatever, and how exhausting and untrue that must be.

Which is stated by an organisation in direct contradiction to what they said immediately beforehand.

Erm...

thanks bitbewildered

the summary / overview page is here and has some interesting figures.

scroll down for the summary!

Called Sheshelob 'slob' because she/he chose to call me fraude.

Erm, I don't want to point out the obvious, but your NN is 'SigmundFraude'.

My nn is Sigmund or SigmundFraude.

'You regularly come on to a thread with sneering comments and insults'

After I've been sneered at and insulted, I think you'll find. Pretty much always.

Well, curlew, it started off as a good attempt at serious discussion, and made me think. Thank you.