Small things that make you angry and you feel you can't mention elsewhere

[MalenkyRusskyDrakonchik]

I was thinking that maybe we need one of those threads that reminds us we all have much more in common with each other, than any of us does with the misogynistic bigots.

I don't know what the feministy equivalent of 'first world problem' is, but I bet there are loads of things you've been itching to point out annoy you, but don't start an AIBU about, or don't moan to your colleague/DH/mates about because it feels insignificant.

Maybe we can all have a good moan here - and maybe back each other up that these things typically aren't so small and insignificant really!

I will go first. I noticed the other day how, when I'm walking down a pavement, I automatically move to the side out of the way of busy men striding along with briefcases. Even when I'm busy. Why do I do that? And how come I feel rude - and do get funny looks - when I don't do that?

Interesting, I know loads of lawyers who only changed their names personally and kept their maiden name professionally. Can think of at least four in my last office off the top of my head. Including a couple who kept their maiden names for all purposes until they had children, and then used their married name so as to all have one family name.

Going to dinner at PIL's.

The men got massive steaks.

The women got dainty salmon fillets.

Gendered menus was a fad at weddings a few years back too wasn't it (based on my hello reading at the hairdresser. They have started bringing me Marie Claire and Tatler now, so I have obviously passed some form of threshold in their eyes).

I get really annoyed when the men have to have all the biggest portions of meat, or more potato too. MIL is a great one for this. I am taller than a good number of men there and I have spent all day running around after pre-schoolers. The men have not been down t' pit.

Oh jeez Sparkly that is shit! It's just so blatant too.

I've never seen gendered menu! I like a steak. Rare. And I hate salad.

how incredibly rude sparkly! have you commented? I can't imagine serving people seperate food!

I didn't comment. It was a while ago and I wasn't a MNetter then .

Mr Tax is exacerbated by the "got to pay the taxman" type meme.

I think if it happens again, "did you mean to be so rude" might be appropriate

yeah doctrine, government seems to be masculine for some reason.

Yesterday, sets of farm stickers being passed round for DC at the end of after school club.
The organiser stops to make sure that the mums of girls are taking the ones with a little girl portrayed doing things (which there seemed to be a lot of) otherwise there wouldn't be enough sets for the boys, who got farm vehicle stickers, or animal stickers, or a little boy doing things.

Because heaven forbid a small boy would have his fun with stickers contaminated by a picture of a girl.

Onetwo34, you've just reminded me of a christmas party I went to as a child. They gave out presents at the end, transformers sets for the boys, and barbie writing sets for the girls. I was overjoyed when I got a transformers set! The mother of the little boy who'd also gotten the wrong present came over to try to swap, and I can remember my DM sticking up for me, so I didn't have to. I loved those toys! (and my DM!)

This thread has inspired me to change from Miss to Ms with my bank, I'm due a new debit card soon :)

I get the food thing a lot. Went for dinner with my brother, he ordered salad, me burger and chips - guess who got the salad?

As for name changing, I like this post on Shakesville.

ShinyPenny

Check out my hair when short on the profile. Really easy, wash and wear - the pic is just after the hairdresser but it looked the same with no 'jushing'.

someone on fwr (this thread I think) mentioned the woman picking dh up and swapping sides phenomenon. We do that!
I got my driving license last year after 9 years together and dh who is the world's shittest backseat driver scares me while I drive he starts instructing me it doing that thing where he pumps his imaginary break.

we argue so much I worry about having an accident but he really can't shut his bloody mouth.

yesterday with this thread in mind I stayed in the drivers seat and 2year old DD told me to switch stats in to my seat

don't want her thinking men can't be seen in the passenger seat. Dh is going to have to learn to hold his tongue.

Your hair looks great, sashh

ThirdTimes Yes, I think you should put your foot down, especially if your young son has picked up on it.

Why shouldn't you drive at least 50% of the time? Maybe you could show him this thread

Well, at the moment it's the Holly Willoughby web chat pre-comments that are making me - anyone else on that?

That was me ThirdTimes! In 12 years of commuting I had seen it so often - I would guess 90% of times - that I wanted to go up and shout at the woman "are you a woman or a mouse?".. Of course I never did - mousey me . Well done you.

On a similar note.l..how often when you see those cars with name strips over the top of the windscreen do you see the woman's name over the driver's and the man's over the passenger's. As rare as a snowball in the Sahara. And how often on a motorbike do you see a man on the pillion? And how often when you see a tandem bike do you see a bloke on the back seat (unless it's two blokes of course)?

well you've inspired me grimble thank you I'm sure dh doesn't see it as a feminist issue he just can't get his head round me driving after so long. the problem is he puts me sick in edge I start making stupid mistakes. I'm fine when he's not in the car as I tell him.

so on edge

Marking my place, and adding this as I have just seen it and it pissed me off -

seeing a 'friend' on dreaded facebook has liked a photo entitled 'domestic violence happens to men too' then reading one of the comments on said photo - "if some cunt attacked me I'd punch the shit out of her" (or similar). FFS!

I don't respond to things like that because I don't want to get into internet arguments with idiots I don't know, but it has made me angry. So many places I could start with how wrong it is - both the comment and the dv happening to men! Will come back and read thread later :)

gimble with a tandem, the lighter person has to go at the back so since most women are lighter than most blokes, the woman would usually go on the back.

We bought a tandem a couple of years ago. I got very stabby and angry when the bloke in the shop assumed I'd be on the back.

I was vair vair when he explained the weight thing.

^ Sorry, gimble my last post made me sound like a right pedantic cunt, which I'm not.

yep idiots hijacking conversations about FGM to talk about men's rights. Unbearable.

Also this sort of thing:

www.standard.co.uk/news/uk/scooters-on-the-school-run-are-blamed-for-rise-in-child-injuries-8662981.html

You only need to read the first sentence. Mothers are literally to blame for everything from obesity to road accidents.

quangle I've seen many a fb page suggesting that fgm and male circumcision are the same thing