Small things that make you angry and you feel you can't mention elsewhere

[MalenkyRusskyDrakonchik]

I was thinking that maybe we need one of those threads that reminds us we all have much more in common with each other, than any of us does with the misogynistic bigots.

I don't know what the feministy equivalent of 'first world problem' is, but I bet there are loads of things you've been itching to point out annoy you, but don't start an AIBU about, or don't moan to your colleague/DH/mates about because it feels insignificant.

Maybe we can all have a good moan here - and maybe back each other up that these things typically aren't so small and insignificant really!

I will go first. I noticed the other day how, when I'm walking down a pavement, I automatically move to the side out of the way of busy men striding along with briefcases. Even when I'm busy. Why do I do that? And how come I feel rude - and do get funny looks - when I don't do that?

S'ok Monday - I didn't know that either . Can't think it applies to motor bikes though or to name tapes on windscreens.

Yes that equating male circumcision with FGM gets me all stabby too - not saying male circumcision is right (it's all about consent) so both are equally wrong without consent IMO. But physiologically there is a world of difference and equating the two procedures shows a massive knowledge fail.

I got told once by an arse on FB that most FGM was just like a pin prick He quickly became an ex-friend.

Not sure if anyone has mentioned this yet but one of those small things that can really ruin your day is "Smile, it might never happen" and other variants. Fuck the fuck off. It can give me the rage for several days hours. For me it epitomises the patriarchy. That sense of entitlement that it is OK to encroach on a woman's private space and make her give her attention to the man in the vicinity.

There is also just no adequate retort either

"It just has. You spoke to me. Inanely."

Can I add something that happened to me today?

I work part-time and pick my children up 2 days a week from school, the other days they are collected by a child-minder. Today was sports day and co-incided with my afternoon off. At home-time, teacher asked to see me to discuss something about my son. As I sat down she said,

"I know you work so thought I'd find you today." To me if felt like she was saying, "I know you're an uncomitted, careless mother who is never around for her children so I have made a point of forcing you to come and see me now."

Whether or not she meant this, my point is that she would not have used that opening line with a male parent.

I might be being over-sensitive but it really irked me.

A glass of fake champagne
Mini manicure/pedicure and nail paint
Hair styled and a choice of clip in hair braid
Mini facial/hand massage
Ear piercing also included (but clip ons and stick ons will be available
for children who don't want this)
Then at the end there's a little catwalk/fashion show

Can I add being called a snob for thinking the above is a disgusting idea for a 5 year old's birthday? I really should stay off the rest of Mumsnet.

Ha yes Doctrine. Good one! I'll never remember it though

Oh god that poor woman you were mistaken for PQW. You work in academia don't you. I work at an academic institution too. We get academics forgetting who they are speaking to too i.e. a fellow human being

Blimey PQW! I think I would have felt a bit stabby at that!

Third - that party sounds horrific. I'm with you, snob feminist that I am.

Rosa - do you think the teacher would have said the same thing to a father. Probably not.

PromQueen, was it a male venue staff member? You don't say...

I think I'd have actually really enjoyed that myself PQ

Like almost actually helped with coats just to see their face when someone recognized you

I like 'fuck off' as a response to 'smile, love'.

I know it is needlessly aggressive, but it makes me feel happy, so in the end the bloke has achieved his aim, has he not?

(No, I don't do it with blokes who're simply inane and think it's a nice thing to say, only ones who're being sleazy tossers.)

Yep fuck off is my usual response

Jesus, prom.

I somehow skipped over your post just now.

Jesus. How fucking rude!

It'd almost have been worst if you'd been the junior person on their first conference, though - imagine, you'd probably never have come back.

OK, I feel I'm going mad here but this THIS - has 'gender' become a polite synonym for sex [Miranda style voice]? Does nobody use the words 'gender' and 'sex' correctly any more? Or is it just me?

I seem to remember when I was at school, being told that it was impolite to refer to a baby's 'sex'.

I did go to an absurdly prissy school, though.

I've had a similar experience prom

My learning was never to stand near the badges table at a conference. A trail of men will come up to you to ask for their badge and to ask the way to the toilets.

And how often on a motorbike do you see a man on the pillion?

An ex of mine took me to meet some women he had been teaching first aid to. We got to the pub and he was telling them that he had bought a motorbike.

One woman asked, "Do you go on the back of his bike?"

Me "No, but he goes on the back of mine"

He only had a provisional licence

Have you guys seen the last few posts on this thread?

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/media_nonmember_requests/1775976-How-and-why-do-men-use-Mumsnet-Please-help-with-my-university-research-into-male-use-of-parenting-forums?msgid=39811888#39811888

I've no clue who the OP is (some people seem to 'know', I just haven't googled her). But she's paid to do her research and all. I was just thinking of prom's post about being a keynote speaker and getting asked to take the coats!

'you guys' = feminist in shock reverts to automatic sexism.

Go me.

Oh, I'm probably being mean. It wasn't the challenging, it was the assumption she was ignorant/early on in her career.

I suppose I am just wondering how many men would come on MN, explain they're doing research and have been for years, and have people conclude it was an unfunded PhD.

I may be overreacting.