Female privilege

[lose24lb]

There is a lot of talk of male privilege but not female privilege? Can we discuss things from the other point of view?

As a white female in a developed country, my privileges are:

1. If I am a child and I go missing, the media is far more likely to give my case more attention than if I were a boy. And if I'm pretty with blonde hair then all the better, I can guarantee the entire country will know I'm missing and be out looking for me.

1. From an early age the opposite sex will be instructed never to hit me but I will be given the same instructions. And should I strike males I can expect not to be hit back and any social penalties that occur from my actions will actually fall on the male.

1. If I'm not smart and unable to get a well paying job, all I have to do is marry a wealthy man.

1. Most homeless are men, yet most homeless shelters are created with my gender in mind. Which means if I go homeless I am more likely to get a bed in a shelter than if I were male.

1. If I commit a crime I am more likely to get more leniency than a man in the exact same circumstances. People will want to try and understand what made a pretty woman like me do such a thing and look for reasons. Unless I go on a mass murder spree I don't really have to worry about going to prison.

1. If I am attacked, passers-by are far more likely to intervene to protect me than if I were male.

1. As a female I am less likely to be physically attacked in the first place or challenged to a fight.

1. Despite killing almost as many people, prostate cancer gets only a fraction of the funding than breast cancer does. It benefits me if my health issues are given priority over men's health issues even if the men's issues are almost as deadly.

1. If a man masturbates it is seen as disgusting and perverse. If I masturbate then I am seen as pleasuring myself. Female masturbation doesn't carry the same stigma as male masturbation.

10. If I am pretty and/or I can make myself cry I will be able to get away with anything and everything.

11. If I am upset I am allowed to cry without being ridiculed. I don't have to be all macho and bottle my feelings up like boys and men have to do.

12. Similar to #11, I am encouraged to seek help if I need it. Seeking help is not seen as a weakness for my gender. If I seek support I will get it and people won't laugh at me or ridicule me or tell me to "man up" or "take it like a man".

13. I can wear almost anything I want without having my sexual orientation being questioned. If a man doesn't want people to think he is gay then his wardrobe will be extremely limited. But with the possible exception of dungarees I can wear anything I want.

14. One word- chivarly. Because I am female I can expect little perks here and there. One seat left on a bus? It's mine! Expensive dinner bill? The guy can get his wallet out.

15. If my husband lays a finger on me he will be labelled as a wife beater for the rest of his life, be beaten up by other men and spend time in prison. But if I hit my husband people will say "you go girl!" and say he must have deserved it. I can hit my husband and he won't dare hit me back out of fear of what I just pointed out.

16. Violence against women is the worst crime on earth. Violence against men is hilarious, especially if it involved injury to the titter penis/balls.

17. On today's TV programmes my gender is portrayed as being smart, strong and independent. The male characters in today's soaps, comedy's, cartoons etc are shown as complete idiots, deadbeat useless fathers or criminals.

18. I can work with children without being worried about people thinking horrible things or making horrible allegations.

19. If I live in the USA and there is a military draft, I won't be forced against my will to sign up to the army and go fight in battle.

Rigid gender role are not helpful for either men or women. But TBH women do oftentimes come off worst. As the mother of both a girl and boys I know my oldest son really hates it when I talk negatively about men in general. But the fact is he will not face being paid 75% what a man is paid for doing the same job, like my daighter will. I take your point, but the fact is that the gender bias right now in our society is overwhlemingy in favour of men.

"he will not face being paid 75% what a man is paid for doing the same job, like my daighter will."

The pay gap is a myth. Men and women are paid the same for equal work. Men are paid more as a whole because they work more hours than women and only get a tiny fraction of maternity leave than women.

20. If I fail at something, people will be more likely to say I was failed by society, or failed by the "patriarchy" rather than say it was me that failed.

21. If I am sexually harassed and make a complaint, I am far more likely to be believed. If I am a victim of domestic abuse and make complaint, I am likely to be believed. I don't even need evidence most of the time my word is enough, and if it's only my word against his word my word will be given priority.

If a man is sexually harrassed or a victim of domestic abuse and makes a complaint, he will be laughed and ridiculed out of town.

22. If I reject someone's sexual advances, I may do so with public mocking and cruelty and will be cheered on by many if I do so. If a man rejects a woman's advances then people will call him horrible names.

23. If I am female and attracted to other females, most people will not react with the revulsion that they will toward two males sexually attracted to each other.

24. If my gender likes "boy" things noone is going to think we are gay. But if a male likes "girl" things people will think he is either a weirdo or gay.

25. If I am sexually inactive or even a virgin, people aren't going to call me a loser. I'm not under peer pressure to have lots of sex with the opposite gender to have "street cred".

1. If I am a child and I go missing, the media is far more likely to give my case more attention than if I were a boy. And if I'm pretty with blonde hair then all the better, I can guarantee the entire country will know I'm missing and be out looking for me. that's more accurately about being cute, blonde and WHITE. It is called missing white woman syndrome and is actually more about racism than pro female bias

1. From an early age the opposite sex will be instructed never to hit me but I will be given the same instructions. And should I strike males I can expect not to be hit back and any social penalties that occur from my actions will actually fall on the male. but women are more likely to be the victims of violence from men than men ever are from women. Although most common is male on male violence

1. If I'm not smart and unable to get a well paying job, all I have to do is marry a wealthy man. so for a woman to get on in the world, she has to bag a bloke? stepford wife? trophy wife? a woman as property?

1. Most homeless are men, yet most homeless shelters are created with my gender in mind. Which means if I go homeless I am more likely to get a bed in a shelter than if I were male. because as a woman, you are much more at risk of being raped if you are out on the streets. You need protecting more

1. If I commit a crime I am more likely to get more leniency than a man in the exact same circumstances. People will want to try and understand what made a pretty woman like me do such a thing and look for reasons. Unless I go on a mass murder spree I don't really have to worry about going to prison. what if you're not pretty? that a woman's worth is in how physically attractive she is is actually a BAD thing. Women make up less of the prison population because women are conditioned to be 'nice' and 'compliant'. This makes them less likely to commit crime than men and also for there to BE a reason that can be used in mitigation

1. If I am attacked, passers-by are far more likely to intervene to protect me than if I were male. *Really? If the person attacking you is your partner, you're pretty much on your own. Also if there are lots of people around, the chances are nobody will help you (the bystander effect) plus as you're a woman, people will be asking what you did to "deserve it"

Where your evidence that the pay gap is about hours?

You aren't interested in discussing privilege, you are basically complaining 'what about the menz'. Your ideas about violence and the gendered experience of violence are so far wide of the mark it's laughable.

1. As a female I am less likely to be physically attacked in the first place or challenged to a fight. that's because men are more aggressive than women. Most aggressive behaviour is from men. Why is that?

1. Despite killing almost as many people, prostate cancer gets only a fraction of the funding than breast cancer does. It benefits me if my health issues are given priority over men's health issues even if the men's issues are almost as deadly. cervical cancer is one of the biggest killers of women yet the government changed the rules about what age you start to get screened for it and as a result, women are dying.

1. If a man masturbates it is seen as disgusting and perverse. If I masturbate then I am seen as pleasuring myself. Female masturbation doesn't carry the same stigma as male masturbation. seriously? male masturbation is no big deal yet a woman who masturbates is seen as being a freak. Women are not meant to seek out sexual pleasure at the risk of being seen as 'whores'. Doesn't carry the same stigma my eye. Blokes will happily and laughingly admit to rubbing one out while women will deny they ever touch their own bodies

10. If I am pretty and/or I can make myself cry I will be able to get away with anything and everything. and you think that's a positive? You have to be attractive if you are a woman. Nothing else about you matters. This is part of the patriarchy, not some silly idea of female privilege.

25. i never feel compelled to manufacture bullshit lists as a result of my own angry feelings of inadequacy and then inflict them on people who don't care

ps i know how you can lose your 24 pounds ask me go on i dares ya

These privileges aren't very good though are they? Where is the money and power?

11. If I am upset I am allowed to cry without being ridiculed. I don't have to be all macho and bottle my feelings up like boys and men have to do. but you will be seen as weak and manipulative. A woman crying is certainly ridiculed. It is seen as a weakness in your gender

12. Similar to #11, I am encouraged to seek help if I need it. Seeking help is not seen as a weakness for my gender. If I seek support I will get it and people won't laugh at me or ridicule me or tell me to "man up" or "take it like a man". again, part of this idea that women are weak

13. I can wear almost anything I want without having my sexual orientation being questioned. If a man doesn't want people to think he is gay then his wardrobe will be extremely limited. But with the possible exception of dungarees I can wear anything I want. but you can't wear what you like without being sexually harassed and if god forbid you are raped, what you wear will be scrutinised. How you dress and what you look like matters more than how intelligent you are or how nice a person

14. One word- chivarly. Because I am female I can expect little perks here and there. One seat left on a bus? It's mine! Expensive dinner bill? The guy can get his wallet out. how patronising is that? Look after the little woman. No thanks. Give the seat to the person who needs it most, perhaps due to age. Not to someone because they're a woman. If a man thinks that just because someone is a woman, they need protecting, that's a sexist and out dated attitude they are displaying. Also, paying for dinner is normally done because the bloke hopes to get his leg over. In effect, he is attempting to secure sex. Some even feel ENTITLED to it...

15. If my husband lays a finger on me he will be labelled as a wife beater for the rest of his life, be beaten up by other men and spend time in prison. But if I hit my husband people will say "you go girl!" and say he must have deserved it. I can hit my husband and he won't dare hit me back out of fear of what I just pointed out. yes. Don't I just wish that was true. Most blokes who hit their wives never get any consequence. It's not that long ago that hitting your wife was seen in the same way as hitting your kids. A form of discipine given by a loving man. Police would walk away from a 'domestic' (some still will). There's an undercurrent of 'what did she do to deserve it'. Conviction rates for violence against your partner are ridiculously low. 2 women a week are murdered by their partner/ex partner. Women are seen by these men as their property

16. Violence against women is the worst crime on earth. Violence against men is hilarious, especially if it involved injury to the titter penis/balls. Violence against woman has an oddly low conviction rate for the worst crime on earth. And the system still works on the 'what did she do to make him hit her' principle. A woman is responsible for the actions of a man against her.

17. On today's TV programmes my gender is portrayed as being smart, strong and independent. The male characters in today's soaps, comedy's, cartoons etc are shown as complete idiots, deadbeat useless fathers or criminals. ha. also pretty and young. because physical attractiveness and youth in women is all that matters. Try being an ugly or old woman in this world and see where it gets you. Youth and attractiveness worship is not the same thing as female privilege. It is a sign of patriarchy that a woman is treated as an attractive object to be displayed

18. I can work with children without being worried about people thinking horrible things or making horrible allegations. and you'll be expected to because all things children are the role of women. That's your job. To cook and clean and look after the kids

19. If I live in the USA and there is a military draft, I won't be forced against my will to sign up to the army and go fight in battle. because your government will feel you incapable

20. If I fail at something, people will be more likely to say I was failed by society, or failed by the "patriarchy" rather than say it was me that failed. nope. They'll be more likely to say that you failed because you're a woman. Mind you, if you succeed it will be because you slept with someone or stuck your tits out or something.

21. If I am sexually harassed and make a complaint, I am far more likely to be believed. If I am a victim of domestic abuse and make complaint, I am likely to be believed. I don't even need evidence most of the time my word is enough, and if it's only my word against his word my word will be given priority. yeah, except that conviction rates are really low because the default is NOT to believe you. Mostly, he'll get off.

If a man is sexually harrassed or a victim of domestic abuse and makes a complaint, he will be laughed and ridiculed out of town. a man is about a million times less likely to be either. Women are at most risk of both. A man is reasonably safe from sexual harrassment and domestic abuse. How many men get rubbed up at the photocopier or told that if they're not 'nice', they might lose their job? How many men are penalised when they become parents? How many men per week are killed by their abusive female partner (clue: it's a hell of a lot fewer than 2 every week)

22. If I reject someone's sexual advances, I may do so with public mocking and cruelty and will be cheered on by many if I do so. If a man rejects a woman's advances then people will call him horrible names. but she's unlikely to rape him.

23. If I am female and attracted to other females, most people will not react with the revulsion that they will toward two males sexually attracted to each other. no, because girl on girl is a common male fantasy. It's ok cos it turns on the menz

24. If my gender likes "boy" things noone is going to think we are gay. But if a male likes "girl" things people will think he is either a weirdo or gay. walk into a shop and look at all the sparkling pink crap and come back and talk to me about boy things and girl things

25. If I am sexually inactive or even a virgin, people aren't going to call me a loser. I'm not under peer pressure to have lots of sex with the opposite gender to have "street cred". fucking frigid cock tease

14 should read protecting from having to stand up on the big bad old bus

Surely the biggest female privilege is that on divorce or separation, the assumption is that the children will stay with the woman and the man will pay maintenance. I would hate to have to pay maintenance and see less of my children...
Also it is much more socially acceptable for a woman to live off the earnings of a man. Even before children come along it's more acceptable for the man to pay for dinner, drinks etc. again I would hate it to be assumed that I will always be paying (I go out with a lower earning man but expect
him to pay his way)

To quote Julia Stiles;

"What is this? Asshole week?"

Female privilege or assumption that it is the job of the woman to care for the children?

You could argue that it is privilege or you could argue that it is sexism. Part of the idea that if you are female, you are the one who is expected to do all the child care.

How often does a bloke out with his kids get told how great he is? oh, you're such a GREAT dad, taking them to the park.

How often does a woman get told the same thing? We don't. Cos it's our job.

Same way that a bloke loading the dishwasher does it "for you".

Cos by default - you're the cleaner.

Female privilege or sexist stereotype?

Hey, I'm not saying there's not male privilege too! But can't be denied there are certain things women benefit from

Beachcomber

A 'kept woman' is not an empowered thing to be. It goes back to the days where a woman was the property of the man. Also paying for dinner gives some men the idea they're paying for more.

Also it is changing, and going dutch is becoming more common.

And those who do get paid for or supported by the man before there are children are sneered at and called gold diggers and always have been.

When there are children, as a woman, you can't win. If you stay at home, you're wrong. If you go out to work, you're wrong. I've never heard a man being berated as women are over the whole sahm/wohm debate.

In fact, a man in employment who is a parent isn't even CALLED a wohf is he? Yet a woman is defined by her parental status. Why is that?

Certainly, I would say that as a woman, I will, if me and my husband ever split, benefit on an individual level from the sexist assumption that because of my gender I will be the primary caregiver and therefore the children will stay with me.

It will benefit me on an individual level because my children will live with me!

But the reason why it will be assumed that I will have them with me is rooted in sexism.

1. And if not pretty with blonde hair?

1. Were you not bought up not to hit anyone, regardless of gender?

1. Why are men wealthier in comparison with women?

1. Many shelters targeted at women are to help when DV has been a factor.

1. Really?

1. Males are more likely to be doing the attacking.

1. Perhaps less likely to be challenged to a fight, but certainly more likely to suffer DV. And who is mostly instigating this attacking and fighting- men.

1. Yet, when women are ill, they are expected to 'get on with it'.

1. Is it? Who says it's disgusting? Female masturbation is still taboo to even talk about in many walks of life.

10. Because women are soo manipulative?

11. I don't know anyone who would ridicule a man for crying.

12. Women get told to 'man up' and 'take it like man' because women are just so weak, aren't they?

13. A man can wear anything he wants without getting harrassed on the street or accused of tempting rapists. Why is being seen as gay something bad?

14. One word- patronising.

15. Which people are you socialising with who would advocate violence?

16. Yet domestic violence and rape towards women is so commonplace?

17. Male characters on TV are always the default. Women are mostly ornamental and their roles revolving around children/ their relationships with men.

18. The majority of paedophiles convicted are men.

19. Because women are weak and would be useless? Or because we must preserve their reproductivity?

20. Not that I've heard anyone blame the patriarchy, it IS harder for women.

21. The victim, regardless of gender, is given the benefit of the doubt. How many rapes and how much DV goes unreported because women fear they won't be believed?

22. What horrible names? Never heard of this. If a woman accepts sexual advances, she's called a slag. If she refuses, she's called a slag.

23. Homophobic people will react with revulsion whatever the gender.

24. Because being a female is seen as lower than a male.

25. Women are called slags for having sex and frigid for refusing.

"that's because men are more aggressive than women. Most aggressive behaviour is from men. Why is that?"

Just a suggestion but could it be because girls and women are allowed to express themselves and cry when they need to?

Boys are conditioned to bottle up all their feelings, then when it builds up and becomes too much the feelings explode in a fit of rage.

Just a theory.

"Why is being seen as gay something bad?"

I don't have anything against gay people. The problem is there are plenty of people who do. I don't think you need me to tell you gay people can experience verbal and physical abuse for no reason other than being gay.

"18. The majority of paedophiles convicted are men."

The majority of paedos may be men, but that doesn't mean all men are paedos. So why should typical men who aren't paedos take the blame for the actions of the small percentage who are?

Would it be fair to suspect all muslims to be terrorists because a tiny percentage of them are?

I am not an expert in this area, so would be very interested to see factual information that lesbian women experience less prejudice than gay men in areas that really matter - relationships with family and friends, jobs, housing, financial provision.

Because the only difference I see on an anecdotal level and in the media is from the kind of man who is disgusted at the idea of two men together but gets some kind of thrill from the idea of two women - as if their lives together are just a show put on for his personal titliation based on porn culture. And that's just another form of homophobic misogyny.