"Aung Sang Suu Kyi should have put her children first"

[blondieminx]

Just heard most staggering discussion on Jeremy Vine (yes i know - but am working from home while poorly, with Radio 2 on!) with overemotional "educationalist and commentator" Simon Waugh who was sadly orphaned age 6 who spent a good ten minutes saying that since Aung Sang Suu Kyi became a mother she should have put them first and come out of Burma to fight the battle from afar.

This is the woman who won the Nobel Peace Prize for her work in Burma FFS. As the lady from Refuge (didn't catch her name) said, "you woudn't be saying all this if she was a man". Quite.

Just makes me feel very ranty that some men, and specifically "educationalists" think that a woman's place is always in the home. Even in the case of a Nobel Peace Prize winning inspirational woman who has changed the path of her country and been a beacon of light and democracy.

she may not have done the right thing by her children (?)
It doesnt mean she didnt do the right thing

Grrr...I wasnt going to get involved with what is right or wrong...there is no right or wrong

She did a great thing, at massive personal cost

And honestly, and this is my last word on the subject, but I truly believe that the reason the world is so fucked up is because parents continually put their children first. They are made into little emperors. I think it does a child a world of good to learn that other people are just as important.

Really, that is why the world is so fucked up? Because people value children too much?

Yes, I can see that as a key factor in all the genocides, femicides, sexual violence, engineered famines, modern-day slavery, authoritarianism, etc and so on plaguing the world. Jaysus.

'I think it does a child a world of good to learn that other people are just as important.'

Well said, yellow. The assertion about Aung Sang Suu Kyi is clearly sexist. And a load of bollocks. But then what else would you expect from Jeremy Vile?

Seriously, why are we discussing this in the feminist section! Don't remember a thread ever on here discussing a famous man's parenting choices?

I think tulips is my mother (see my post on page 1 of thread). Hello, Mum!

'Seriously, why are we discussing this in the feminist section! Don't remember a thread ever on here discussing a famous man's parenting choices?'

Louis de Bernières?

I seriously wonder if one of the men on FWR is my dad

if you are, you are extremely sexist although you pretend to be all feministy

I took Whatmeworry's comments to be more questioning her future impact, but okay

That's exactly what I meant, in that this has only begun, once she is in the cut and thrust of compromise politics I predict it will be harder to maintain the halo effect.

Actually dreamingbohemian I think a lot of stuff comes from a massive sense of entitlement. The big stuff? I don't know. But the shite little things that make everyone's lives a bit more miserable, yes, I think you can ascribe a lot of it to over-indulgent parenting.

I don't think anyone sees her as a saint. I think they see what she went through as extraordinary. Who knows what she'll do in the future? But let's not piss on her chips before she's even started.

Also can't believe this is in the feminist section. Fuck me. Is there ANY woman on the planet we can just respect?

Yellow - No because women are held to much higher standards than men.

fucking hell whatmeworry, selfishness??

Yes, obviously. No one gets to achieve great, hugely time consuming life-work things without being pretty selfish about where/with who/how they spend their time. You'd get nothing done otherwise.

Its a tradeoff, as I noted in my original post. You have to judge her treatment of family issues against her impact on Burma. I happen to think sorting Burma out is a higher calling than a few kids.

But, I also think the hard stuff is only just beginning, and I don't think her halo will survibe untarnished.

I don't think selfish is the right word. I am a teacher. If I spend all my time preparing for my job, making sure my class has the best lessons and support possible, to the exclusion of others in my life, am I really selfish?

Single-minded, maybe. Focused.

To call her selfish and to diminish what she's achieved is just totally disrespectful.

I think she is an amazing woman.

Every woman has her own choice, or should have a choice, how to live her life and decide on her destiny.

She deserves a medal (oh wait, what was that Nobel thingy?).

The guy on the radio is entitled to his view. In entitled to say I think his view suggests he's a twit. And a sexist one at that.

There is a lot of sexism about. It is around all the time. It's around even on mumsnet if I say i took 2 weeks off work to have a baby. It's endemic.

Also her husband was allowed to visit her from |I think about 88 - 95 there and then the state stopped that. She was not given a lot of choices.

As for how the children turned out the saddest thing I read in the press today is that the sun which is with her over here is split from his wife who has taken the 2 grandchidlren to live in France - I know no details of that but a lot of contact/residence issues are very sexist against men. Presumably if she has never met them it would have been rather nice to get them over to see their granny.

Aung San Suu Kyi
Emily Pankhurst
Indira Gandhi
Margerat Thatcher
Benazir Bhutto
Shirin Ebadi
Jasvinder Sanghera

Let's just ignore what they have done for the world, eh? Let's just wipe them off the map for daring to put their lives at risk, for the sake of their beliefs, and for daring to pursue their beliefs despite the negative effect it could have on their children. Let's be all judgemental and just admire the childless ones, eh? I could of course add the hundreds of names of the men who have put their lives on the line despite being fathers.

I guess people would be denigrating Jesus if he was female and had children, for putting the whole of humankind before his own child! How selfish can you be, and Im sure being tortured and crucified wasnt all that bad

Margaret Thatcher???? Bl**dy Hell.

Even she now says she regrets neglecting her children who now don't have much to do with her.

tulips "I would always choose my child over a country. No achievment is worth sacrificing the love and respect of my children. I could not live with myself if my children knew that for YEARS they were not my priority. I'm sure others could have furthered her cause in Burma, she didn't have to do it all. It might have taken longer that's all but at least her children would have not been the losers."

And then you would have attacked the others for not prioritising their children. Or do you think effecting change should be something only to be done by the childless?

That sounds like a really selfish pov, tulips. it's not about the respect and love given to you, y'know...

There's more to life than receiving the adulation of your offspring.

No. Efffecting change can be done without simultaneously abandoning your children. There is ALWAYS a middle ground which all parents have to find. Doing something for yourself whilst also seeing to the important needs of the children you chose to bring into the world. Not easy but possible and essential if you are a parent. Not so if you are childless. I've said this all along. But nearly everyone on here is so blinded by the light of Aung Sang that they cannot seem to take on board another point of view.

I never normally post on the feminist boards as they are too extreme and very blinkered and this thread has shown that perfectly.

She made huge sacrifices for her beliefs but I have always thought that not much is made of the sacrifices her children made without being given any say in it at all. I thought she came across rather oddly in the interview last night where she was asked about not seeing her children. She seemed very detached but not sad about it at all.

Actually no there isn't. I don't want the adulation of my children. But i do want them to grow up feeling that i will always be there for them if they need me. Eg if their dad is ill and dying. I want them to know that when the chips are down, when they are in distress and pain that I am the one person they can count on in all the world to drop everything and be there. Those are my values and priorities in life and I'm proud of them. And nothing any of you can say will change that.

They were with their father-they were not abandoned! There often seems to be the view that the mother is the 'superior' parent and the father is second best.