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Weight loss chat

A space to talk openly about weight loss journeys and challenges. Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. You may wish to speak to a medical professional before starting any diet.

Want to cry, nothing works

116 replies

Pusstachio · 11/03/2026 15:40

I am 160cm and weigh 145lb. My waist is just under half my height in the morning but just over in the evening. I am overweight on my BMI.

Before my second child (now 5yo) I was a clear stone lighter.

I’ve tried everything except drugs. PT, health coach, various diets. Health coach did work but was crazy expensive, I couldn’t sustain the expense. She basically checked my MFP weekly and gave me workouts to do through the week.

I strength train once a week with a PT and for the past month have been running 5x a week and sticking to 1600-1700 cals. Just replaced the batteries in the scale and I’m 2lb heavier.

What do I do. Why is this so fucking hard. It wasn’t like this before my second child. I’m 40, is that it? How do I lose even some of this weight.

OP posts:
Unsureaboutitall · 13/03/2026 17:40

Pusstachio · 11/03/2026 15:40

I am 160cm and weigh 145lb. My waist is just under half my height in the morning but just over in the evening. I am overweight on my BMI.

Before my second child (now 5yo) I was a clear stone lighter.

I’ve tried everything except drugs. PT, health coach, various diets. Health coach did work but was crazy expensive, I couldn’t sustain the expense. She basically checked my MFP weekly and gave me workouts to do through the week.

I strength train once a week with a PT and for the past month have been running 5x a week and sticking to 1600-1700 cals. Just replaced the batteries in the scale and I’m 2lb heavier.

What do I do. Why is this so fucking hard. It wasn’t like this before my second child. I’m 40, is that it? How do I lose even some of this weight.

OP I could have written this post.
How long did you try the 1600-1700 kcal for? I tried this last year, started slowly but surely with the odd weekend treats like meals out etc and it took a long time for me to lose some weight but it did eventually happen. So if you are looking for a quick fix then no you won't see great results immediately but if you give yourself a few months, it should definitely work.
I also wouldn't obsess over the number on the scale especially if you work our, but rather check cm, and how clothes fit etc.

I think than anything less than 1600 kcal is not sustainable and you will end up eating all the calories back and more. Especially if you also are training for a marathon!

Re mounjaro, yes that will be an easy fix but then what, will you stay on that for the next 40 years? You are not obese or overweight enough to take medication imo.

Pusstachio · 13/03/2026 18:00

Unsureaboutitall · 13/03/2026 17:40

OP I could have written this post.
How long did you try the 1600-1700 kcal for? I tried this last year, started slowly but surely with the odd weekend treats like meals out etc and it took a long time for me to lose some weight but it did eventually happen. So if you are looking for a quick fix then no you won't see great results immediately but if you give yourself a few months, it should definitely work.
I also wouldn't obsess over the number on the scale especially if you work our, but rather check cm, and how clothes fit etc.

I think than anything less than 1600 kcal is not sustainable and you will end up eating all the calories back and more. Especially if you also are training for a marathon!

Re mounjaro, yes that will be an easy fix but then what, will you stay on that for the next 40 years? You are not obese or overweight enough to take medication imo.

Edited

It was 4 weeks on 1600. I am trying 1400 today but had to dig up some trees as we’re moving and run and I feel tired to my bones right now (haven’t eaten dinner yet)

OP posts:
Lemonthyme · 14/03/2026 07:51

Pusstachio · 13/03/2026 18:00

It was 4 weeks on 1600. I am trying 1400 today but had to dig up some trees as we’re moving and run and I feel tired to my bones right now (haven’t eaten dinner yet)

Stress can impact sleep and weight. More than you think. And we all know moving house is super stressful. Sorry I've not read all of the posts but are you sleeping well?

Unsureaboutitall · 14/03/2026 20:07

Pusstachio · 13/03/2026 18:00

It was 4 weeks on 1600. I am trying 1400 today but had to dig up some trees as we’re moving and run and I feel tired to my bones right now (haven’t eaten dinner yet)

I mean it took about 3 months before I saw a few kg less on the scale, 4 weeks in there was barely any difference!

Pusstachio · 14/03/2026 20:08

Lemonthyme · 14/03/2026 07:51

Stress can impact sleep and weight. More than you think. And we all know moving house is super stressful. Sorry I've not read all of the posts but are you sleeping well?

Noooo not at all. Woke at 2 on Friday morning and didn’t really get back off…

OP posts:
somanychristmaslights · 14/03/2026 20:17

If you’re counting your calories, can you hand on heart say you weigh and log absolutely everything that goes in your mouth? Every bite, lick, taste? Do you include drinks, condiments, how you cook the food etc? If you’re not losing fat, you’re not in a calorie deficit.

Pusstachio · 14/03/2026 20:44

@somanychristmaslights I meal prep breakfast & lunch and weigh the ingredients of the whole batch then divide it by 3 so even if one day is up the next will be down. I don’t weigh fruit, just use estimated calories. I drink black coffee and tea and don’t include that. I don’t lick anything?! Should I be licking more stuff?!

OP posts:
Bearzo · 14/03/2026 22:40

AsparagusSeason · 11/03/2026 17:26

Like you, I was overweight but not obese. I went on mounjaro and it’s been fantastic.

Yep, just get the mounjaro and stop stressing, your calories are too high, mounjaro will stop you eating, you'll lose weight end of.
I did exactly this after years of pissing about 5.5 stone down so easy.

Lemonthyme · 16/03/2026 10:02

Pusstachio · 14/03/2026 20:08

Noooo not at all. Woke at 2 on Friday morning and didn’t really get back off…

Daft idea. Is it worth working on that first?

So this might not be something you want to hear but I'll share my experience. My sleep got horrible in perimenopause and didn't consistently improve until I stopped drinking alcohol. It's still not always perfect but it's made a noticeable difference on quality and quantity. I don't know if you drink and someone suggesting that to me 2 years ago would have got short shrift but being tired makes weight loss super hard. It wasn't a magic wand for weight loss but I think it's provided me with the energy and "will" to do other things including increasing exercise, increasing steps and giving intermittent fasting a go. I am not sure I could have done any of that if I was still as run down as I was.

Even if you don't want to give up alcohol if you do drink (none of my business either way anyway), there are other things which have helped, like having the right room temperature. A calming routine etc.

Lemonthyme · 16/03/2026 10:04

Bearzo · 14/03/2026 22:40

Yep, just get the mounjaro and stop stressing, your calories are too high, mounjaro will stop you eating, you'll lose weight end of.
I did exactly this after years of pissing about 5.5 stone down so easy.

I think this has to be a personal decision. For someone just overweight not obese, then the health benefits of it will be smaller.

willsandnoodle · 16/03/2026 10:38

Focus more on lifting weights, rather than running. It will help you burn calories faster, and make you stronger at the same time.

To take mounjaro would be foolish in your situation

Pusstachio · 16/03/2026 11:04

Lemonthyme · 16/03/2026 10:02

Daft idea. Is it worth working on that first?

So this might not be something you want to hear but I'll share my experience. My sleep got horrible in perimenopause and didn't consistently improve until I stopped drinking alcohol. It's still not always perfect but it's made a noticeable difference on quality and quantity. I don't know if you drink and someone suggesting that to me 2 years ago would have got short shrift but being tired makes weight loss super hard. It wasn't a magic wand for weight loss but I think it's provided me with the energy and "will" to do other things including increasing exercise, increasing steps and giving intermittent fasting a go. I am not sure I could have done any of that if I was still as run down as I was.

Even if you don't want to give up alcohol if you do drink (none of my business either way anyway), there are other things which have helped, like having the right room temperature. A calming routine etc.

I have hugely cut alcohol over the last few years and have on off sobriety. This weekend I drank a glass of wine and a bottle of coors light across two days with meals.

I weighed again this morning and have lost 1-2lb after a week at 1300. It’s not super exciting after a longer period of exercising etc but much better than a gain of course, and probably going to 1600 first made it a lot more sustainable to drop again.

OP posts:
DuchessofStaffordshire · 16/03/2026 16:06

When is the half marathon?
Can you drop one of the weekly runs so you have:
1 long run
2 shorter runs
1 speed session
And throw in one more strength training day.
We'll all different, but if I were you I'd complete the run then spend more time in the gym on strength work. Eg X3 or 4 weight training session with LISS afterwards (half an hour is enough) on treadmill/elliptical/walk/zone 1/2 run.
I'm cycling through a push/pull/legs programme at the moment. I have done before and get good results in terms of fat loss and muscle gain. The first lift of each session is heavy followed by higher reps of lighter weight accessories.

suki1964 · 16/03/2026 23:17

Same height as yourself, Im now 130 - 132 lb having come down from around 160lb , but Ive maintained that weight now for 2 years or more

I was 58 when I decided I wasnt going into the last stage of life overweight and unfit

It isnt easy , the weight dropped slowly - 1lb a week on average

I did my first marathon aged 60 :)

I need to keep at around 1300 calories

To keep full , white has gone, pasta, bread and rice are now whole meal. I add beans and veg to everything - making a chicken curry then in go the chickpeas , cauliflower and spinach . I eat a lot of cheaper protein - cottage cheese, tinned fish , greek yoghurt ( make my own so I can eat it freely ) eggs and whilst I do include healthy fats and I do eat cheese, I have cut out butter - I love it too much and its just too calorific for me to be able to eat enough to stay full without busting the calories if I include it

Meals are just the normal family meals we have always eaten, just cooked differently - my Indians arent as authentic as they once were, because I cook with so little oil, use the air fryer etc, but still very passable , and I will have a side of broccoli or asparagus instead of garlic bread with the lasagne

I eat a lot of veg, but very little fruit, usually frozen berries and the odd pear

I still have a belly, even though I have dropped so many clothes sizes, I think that's the middle aged spread - well that's what Im telling myself

My body is never going to be the same body as it was when I was last at this weight - possibly early 30's - but that's ok - kind of. Im getting used to it. I think I did really have this idea that getting back to my wedding dress weight and size , the body would be as it was back then . But things have definitely shifted

I get my steps in, I cycle, I have a physical job. I could go gym or a class of some sort, but I dont. Maybe I will get there at some point

The drop to what feels too few calories can be scary, if you dont make some changes to what you eat. I possibly ate a lot less ( volume wise ) at my highest weight, all high calorific foods that didnt satisfy my hunger, now Im rarely hungry and eat more normally, I no longer demolish a loaf of bread or eat half a bag of pasta in one sitting , portions are more normal and if we do eat out, I dont stress about choices because I know Im not going to be licking the plate clean and ordering dessert , I eat till Im full, and then put the plate aside. Like Id manage the steak, but half the chips would be left , a burger - I leave the bun

I just made wee changes slowly. I was the original veg dodger, but now eat piles of the stuff , adding grains and beans instead of defaulting to bread, keeping the cheese portions to measured amounts dropping butter completely ( only because I really have no control - it triggers me ) , using potato or mashed root veg as a pie topping rather then pastry

Im happy with my weight and am coming to terms with body shape

Morepositivemum · 16/03/2026 23:27

Op just if you’re training for that distance be careful about cutting calories (or carbs just to warn you) too much, my friend collapsed with a very similar overall picture to you. Just warning you just in case x

3luckystars · 17/03/2026 21:01

BodySlims.

it works

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