When you know what to do but you just can’t do it - what works?

[thenewaveragebear1983]

I am really struggling to get myself “back in the game” . I know what I need to do but I just cannot actually stick to a calorie goal. I am either gaining weight or fighting really really hard to maintain. I am getting sick of it now, and I tried on clothes in next changing rooms yesterday and it was a rude awakening.

I’m not in denial and not understanding why I’m like this, I am fully aware that I am eating rubbish, loads of gluten free bread, sugar galore and hardly any veg. I eat a meal and I am immediately looking for something else. It’s like I am both always hungry and also completely disinterested in food.

here’s the good things- I exercise every day, walking the dog, and run 2-3 times a week and do a boot camp as well. I cook most of my meals from scratch and I like cooking. I plan meals and shop online, I drink water (no fizzy drinks juices). I do drink but I can also go without, I did dry Jan and half of Feb.

i don’t even know why I’m posting this, I guess looking for tips and solidarity?

@thenewaveragebear1983 that's all good news. I'm glad to hear you had a better day and a good weigh!!

I have been making sure I start each day as I mean to go on: drink some water, weigh myself, don't take a diet coke to work.

OP, I could be you! Coeliac with a knee injury which has stopped me running! My BMI is 28 though 😢

I don’t think I did very well in my interview and I really noticed how my first thought when I got home was “I need some sugar”, I think I always knew I did this but it was really obvious today. It’s just where my mind went when I was feeling like that.

It is, at least partly, a conditioned response. You can train yourself out of it by not giving in. That’s easier said than done. But it does get easier.

i’ve had an emotional rollercoaster of a week, I was offered the job and accepted it and now have to negotiate my redundancy with my current role. I have had some good days with my food, and some not so great days. I have been a lot more aware of why I am eating, even if I’ve not been completely on plan.

i have a few upcoming things that i can use as mini goals, a posh family do in March, a Snowdonia weekend at Easter, and of course now my new job starting mid April. So that is going to be my motivation. I’ve also ordered the bright line eating books as recommended upthread

Congratulations on your new job! 💐

Mounjaro

She has said her BMI is 25. She is not eligible for Mounjaro.

The thing that makes me laugh with all the mounjaro preaching on here is that everyone who’s on it says it’s not a quick fix, you still have to be really disciplined etc…. And yet it’s the first thing suggested! And Even if I was eligible I’d be a terrible candidate for mounjaro because I have clearly got a dreadful relationship with food 🤷‍♀️ 🤣

anyway yes. I am not eligible.

I have had an ok few days-meals great, couple of times where I have made bad choices but cupboard supplies are low so there’s nothing sweet really to tempt me. I’ve been trying to have a really large, hot lunch- usually portioned leftovers from the night before. This has been really helping me.

Sounds like you’re making some good changes, OP. Well done.

Yes, thats just not true. It doesn't require discipline or hard work at all which is why, when mounjaro is stopped, most people end up heavier than before, because they just slip back into old habits. Except this time they also have to contend with muscle loss from the MJ so its even harder to lose weight.

It sounds like you've managed to make some good changes already OP. I find after a week of no sugar you start to not want to have those sort of treats any more. It gets much easier. Try replacing some of the cupboard treats to healthier versions such as 85% dark chocolate. You dont have much to lose so a few weeks calorie tracking should get you to your goal

for me it's peri
and an injury that kept me from exercising for a couple of months

I took lent as opportunity to do strict 16/8. no snacks but no denying.

Yeah peri just seems to have ground everything to a halt really, I just feel like I don’t do anything fast anymore. Even things like quickly running the vacuum round or filling the dishwasher, I just seem to be soooooo sloooooow so it’s no wonder my metabolism has slowed down as well.

I have an annoying shin splint type pain in the front of my calf today, which puts me out of action for running this weekend as it’s an injury I can’t afford to have long term if I’m going to stand any chance of running my marathon in October

Ive found yoga and pilates are a good way to just keep moving and keep joint mobility if I'm injured

I had a really good day today. I read the bright lines book that was recommended above. It’s really interesting but I think I would find it really hard to do 100% and I’d end up either breaking it or having completely different meals to the family. However I have taken some basic principles from it and I’m going to follow them this week.

1. eat 3 meals and no snacks - I like this, my meals are generally good and I just need to increase them and maximise the veg
2. eat more veg (the plan has 20 oz veg or salad a day, so trying to increase that)
3. no flour or sugar -without a doubt I eat too much of these, so trying to cut them out is a good idea
4. weighing my food (where possible) and aiming for the portions suggested in the book, however not being so strict on eg exactly 4oz protein - not feasible when dividing meals up Among family etc

I’ve had a good day, drank loads of water too and no run because of my bad leg. But I did do a short yoga flow, it’s literally months since I have done any so just started small

I agree with no flour or sugar.
However I found it better to have plain sugar sweets than anything starchy or carby
Firstly because you know it’s crap you’re eating so you naturally know limit it (rather than thinking a fruit scone is healthier and not worrying )
and secondly because it’s much easier to count every sweet you eat as calories.
Thirdly I think sugar burns off quicker - but that’s just my non medical
understanding.

I don’t think sugar burns off at all really, it turns to fat! I don’t really eat cakey type things anyway as I am gluten free so it always tends to be chocolate and I just cannot moderate it.

Glad you have had a better day.

I feel the same as you and I am peri.

So you will be doing 3 meals a day and no snacks?

I could try this worse time for me is getting in from work and dinner.

@Sunshineandrainbow yes, and trying to make my meals bigger with protein, fat and lots of veg. I did have a baked potato tonight because Tesco delivery has been delayed till 9pm!

would a couple of squares of chocolate melted into espresso fill that chocolate shaped hole?

I have dug out those teeny tiny dipping sauce bowls to portion out my after-meal treat.

really hope that no snacks and no food after dinner will help.

@bloodredfeaturewallno, I don’t think it would - I only drink coffee before 9am and if I ate chocolate then I would never stop. It’s funny, even as I wrote that I thought I am actually incredibly disciplined when it comes to certain things- I love coffee, but it affects my sleep so i categorically will not drink it after my morning cup. I do this completely and never get tempted. And yet with sugar I have no discipline at all 🤷‍♀️ for me I am far better having none than having 2 squares.

I listened to an interesting podcast where they talked about the virtues of abstainers vs moderators and the benefits of each,

I haven’t read Bright Line Eating, OP, but I do much of that anyway:

No snacking - although I do 2 meals rather than 3.

No sugar (apart from the tiny bit in 2 squares of 85% dark chocolate); I don’t do strictly no flour, but because I am low carb I eat very little. Bread or pasta - a small helping once in a while, not a regular thing; I occasionally use a bit of flour to thicken a sauce, and that’s about it. No cakes, obviously, because no sugar.

I eat loads of veg and salad, because very little potato, pasta or rice, so I make the bulk up with those.

I draw the line at weighing and measuring. I will occasionally check portion sizes of certain foods which are a bit of a grey area for me -,such as nuts, easy to eat a lot of. If I get the feeling that my handfuls are getting bigger, I might weigh them for a few days to recalibrate my eyes.

The one thing I don’t weigh any more is me! There really is no need. If I’m losing or gaining fat, it will be obvious based on the way my clothes fit. Goal jeans, that’s the way for me.

@PuzzledObserver I’d love to be able to be like that but at the moment I think I need a strict set of rules. I do seem to be naturally maintaining but I want to lose so I need to know what I’m eating in order to get a deficit. No flour and sugar actually really helps because if you take those out that’s a whole lot of junk food that you don’t/can’t/wont eat. There’s not much left! Adding lots of veg to meals as well. I have bought ingredients to make a big roasted tray of veg and also a fruit salad to keep prepped in the fridge.

My thinking is the body uses the easiest calories first. So sugar.
If you don’t use it then it’s stored as fat. I think starchy carbs take longer to break down so more readily stored if you don’t need them.

Gretchen Rubin is good on abstainers vs moderators if you wanted to dig into that a bit more.