Petite support for losing a few pounds/getting to our 'happy' size

[ACuppaAlwaysHelps]

Hi all. Following on from the thread that @SprayPaint started yesterday, a few of us (@Waiting9 @Horriblehistoree @FaceofSpades) seemed keen to have a thread to support each other in reaching our weight loss/body shape/fitness/health goals.

All petites are welcome on this thread, but it seemed like it would be particularly helpful to have a corner of Mumsnet for those of us who are petite/small framed and officially a 'healthy weight' but know we feel/look better a few pounds lighter (which would still be within a healthy weight/not underweight).

Maybe we can share goals, progress, struggles, things that are working, etc.? It would also be lovely to hear from any petites who are at a 'happy weight' and what you are doing to be successful.

Someone (maybe @FaceofSpades?) posted some helpful thoughts on the thread yesterday.

Please share how you all think this thread could be helpful.

Feel free to share as much or little as you like. Height, current weight, goal weight or other body measurements, nutrition, calories, exercise, NSV, etc.

That's Flabby Feb out of the way 😂
The whole month was a bit of a write off for various reasons. Some fun 😋. Two weeks of cold gloomy weather minus the boiler, not so much. I have gained, but I'm hoping some of that is bloat including hormonal bloat taking advantage.

March (if the weather behaves) is usually the start of me gaining some momentum@. Its so much easier when you don't crave carbs to stay warm and the salad section in the shops looks more appealling.

The fridge is now filled with fresh food and I'm aiming to regularly prepare a tub with lightly dressed salad so I can dip in and take a bit as I need to.

I really need to get into gear on more plants and fewer carbs now. And get more consistent on exercise. I've found it a really hard winter to keep momentum on running regularly. I definitely can't outrun a bad diet, but regular exercise burn definitely buys me a more interesting diet and avoiding being too punitive.

Onwards and downwards 😁🥗

I'm in exactly the same place @BogRollBOGOF! I did loads of yoga last month but less running, and my snacking and drinking really crept up. I'm hoping the nice weather will spur me on and I'll get my enthusiasm back.

The good news for me is that I only gained 0.5kg during Feb, I slid off the wagon so far I could easily gain a lot more if I don't turn it around now. Last year it took me all year to lose 4kg, with ups and downs, and I am fully expecting the same pace this year. So this is a blip and march will be better. I have loads of things happening, birthdays and trips away, so I will need to try extra hard and jam in a run wherever I can.

Life will always happen and have phases with poor compatibility with focusing on nutrition and movement.

The disadvantage of being a small woman with modest amount to lose is that other people don't see the need for the effort which makes it harder to decline things and state boundaries. Plus the margins in to excess over what you need are so low.

We went on holiday over half term and with staying in a hotel, we ate out every night and shared a bottle of wine, and now my clothes are all feeling tight. It was hardly wildly excessive by general standards, and as I can't drink artificial sweetners it's either alcohol or coke anyway. I weighed in yesterday and had gone up to 65.7kg which is a BMI of 26.7 It had been low 25s, and that's how fragile the margins are on small amounts.

The good bit was we did lots of walking and I took advantage of the cool, empty swimming pools to do a lot of actual swimming!

I don't like telling people in RL that I'm trying to lose weight because there's a strong chance that it hits their insecurities about their bodies when so many people are larger than me and that they'll infer that I'm critical of them. It's not. It's about wanting to feel good in my own body and clothes. For movement not to feel heavy. To not be rubbed sore by chaffing. My friends have their own lives and issues and they have to do what's right for them in their own time.

I need to go back and catch up on the thread from the last couple of weeks, but just wanted to say @BogRollBOGOF I completely relate to your last paragraph!

I even feel it a little bit re: what I'm going to post now (as I'm aware that even on this thread, we all are slightly different heights, weights and BMIs). But, I'm hoping it's ok to share where I'm at....

I'm feeling frustrated. I weighed 8st8 this morning. I'm very aware that doesn't sound high, but I currently seem to be slowly gaining weight rather than losing. (I think it’s 3 or 4 pounds heavier than when we started this thread!) I definitely feel/look better around 8 stone - every extra pound is on my belly. I think I’m most frustrated as I really feel like I’m trying everything.

I'm eating between 1200-1400 calories per day (most days 1200), walking 20,000 steps and doing Caroline Girvan workouts 5 days per week.

Has anyone got any thoughts? I’m happy for you to be blunt/honest!

No thoughts. I’m the same. I started at Xmas at 9 stone 4 and 2 weeks ago I hit 8 stone 12. Today I am 9 stone 3. There is absolutely no way I have eaten enough to gain back that amount. Even 2 days ago I was 9 stone! My weight will sometimes jump 3-4lbs up or down within 24 hours with no rhyme or reason. I’ve really got no idea why or what is going on. It’s not always linked to my cycle but it sometimes is. But either way I’m eating in a deficit and exercising and see no consistent downward trend.

Same. I weighed in at my highest weight for years today - 9 stone.

And I guarantee I haven't eaten/drunk anywhere near the calories to put it on.

I've meticulously calorie counted. Upped my exercise.

I'm starving by evening and light headed when I get up from being sat down!

My RHR is 42 so I'm wondering if it's a thyroid issue because this is getting ridiculous.

I really resonate with your post.

People assume I have an "issue" but I really don't- being so short it's just that weight shows and I hate feeling uncomfortable.

I feel like the day I hit 40, I lost the ability to lose weight.

Any hidden calories in drinks you can think of?

Or the calories themselves- how do your macros look?

I can almost guarantee you're doing everything right, it's frustrating as hell!

I started to Google those weight loss jabs.

I would love to join the petites thread. Placemarking for now.

I don't like telling people in RL that I'm trying to lose weight because there's a strong chance that it hits their insecurities about their bodies when so many people are larger than me and that they'll infer that I'm critical of them.

@BogRollBOGOF this resonates a lot with me. I am a 5 ft nothing small framed person on whom every pound shows. I don't talk about weight in RL so this thread is a relief to me.

Hey ladies.

Still no movement on the scales. Still 8st 9lb and a roast dinner going to be served shortly.

I can't openly talk about this in RL either because it is a very sensitive subject but I know damn well I look and feel better in myself at 8st.

I keep trying and I've never had this problem before either. Soul destroying. Anyway let's try for the best and tomorrow is a new week. X

I agree! I'm 5ft 2 and 9st 4lb. It's a healthy weight, especially post-menopause.

I'd look very unwell at, say 8st 2lb which I was in my teens and 20s.

But it's so individual though - it depends on your build and muscle tone, where you store fat etc.

I seem to store weight on my hips & chest, I also have broad shoulders and big boobs so I look dead "chunky" when I'm half a stone over my ideal weight.

I don't like how clothes fit, I get a bra/back roll and muffin top which makes me feel self conscious so I'd rather just get that half stone off - also I don't want my weight to slowly creep up either.

I don't think that means eating disorder? I've never been underweight, ever!

Agree. There is nothing wrong with being a healthy weight and still want to lose a few lbs.

At 9 stone 4 at my height I get a roll of fat over my jeans and my thighs chafe when I wear a skirt. At 8 stone 10 neither of those things happen. My clothes fit better and I feel better at the lower weight. Both of those weights are within the healthy bmi range for my height.

Eating at a small calorie deficit and exercising regularly to achieve the lower weight is not an eating disorder.

Wow some really judgemental posts on this thread. You can be in the healthy range and still want to tone up. I lived in France for quite a few years and even though I was a bmi of about 21 when I lived there, I was still one of the largest women at work, regardless of age. And they were mostly short, white women who exercised, like me. I feel a lot of women in the UK are very defensive about weight which is understandable as we are pretty fat in general.

I’ve also noticed medics in France were never shy about telling you that losing a bit of weight would help manage pain symptoms, but I’ve never been advised that over here, even though all that I’ve read around my various health conditions say losing weight helps reduce pressure on the joints, back pain etc.

like many I’ve put a good bit of weight on in the last few years and it’s really dragging me down. I’m at the top end of healthy and want to lose a few kilos of lard to get to a lower body fat percentage which should help ease my haemorrhoid problems and joint issues from auto immune disease. I’m doing it in a healthy way by eating three high fibre meals a day, no snacks, and moving as much as possible.

Funny how out of all the posts on this thread this is the one you pick to quote and ignore other remarks about the weight women have been in the past and been healthy at (and are a healthy BMI).

Both these weights would be in the healthy BMI range for a 5’2 person

8 st 2 towards the lower end of healthy and 9 st 4 towards the upper end

There is nothing wrong with aiming to be at the lower end. It does not shout eating disorder. Just says you prefer being slim.

If you heard of a 5’9 person aiming for 10 stone you probably wouldn’t be bothered but that is actually a lower BMI than a 5’2 person aiming for 8st 2.

I’m 5’3 and about 9 st 2 - I don’t think I’m unhealthy now but I could definitely stand to lose a bit.

And they picked out a post from October presumably not bothering to read months of posting after that.

I love my body. I love what it does for me. It lifts weights. It's run a marathon and usually runs 3 HMs a year. It created my children and bore a lot of physical cost for it.
It deserves to be nurtured and well nourished. It deserves to be kept in a healthy state with a mass it can cope with. It's at a stage of life where that's no longer a care-free process and requires concious effort.

That is very far from disordered.

Disordered eating is also about far more than thin people eating small potions.

While MN is often rife with disordered attitudes to food and eating (one post yesterday in a general section was a person of BMI 20 wishing they could have weightloss injections) this thread is refreshingly free of it. People on this thread are consuming nutritious diets and moving, not looking for quick fix (crash) options.

I know I have a little bit more body fat than I need because my legs and bum are telling me as I run. Because my waist looks lumpy in clothes. Because of thigh/ armpit/ bra chaffing which weren't a problem when I was in the low 9s. I'm not chasing being a 20 year old again. I don't have the build to be chasing 8s in my 40s, which is absolutely fine. I want to feel physically more comfortable which probably is realistically low 9s, BMI 23 zone.

If I don't do something, that lb here and lb there which accumulate over time will continue to accumulate until I have to replace all my clothes, until I feel constantly sluggish, until health problems kick in. I'm nipping it in the bud now while everything is still healthy and good. I haven't been particularly sucessful over the winter, but I have generally been focused on healthier options so no harm done.

TBH, I think that's as about a healthy attitude to my body and feeding it as anyone can have. 🤷‍♀️

I am 5" 2, 8 stone 13 and I look 8 months pregnant because ALL the weight goes on my stomach. Visceral fat is the most unhealthy, and whilst my BMI is in range, I'm a few inches above the recommended waist to height ratio.

It really isn't as simple. What's a healthy weight for someone who gains in proportion isn't for me. 8 stone 2 is my ideal. I will settle for 8 stone 5. No, I haven't got an eating disorder.

But disappointed to see this post on a thread that's meant to be for those of us who can't discuss our weight precisely because of this sort of response.

Whereas I'm hiding a lot in calf, thigh and butt muscle. There is a flabby CS overhang (which I'm mostly at peace with), but most of my weight can be hidden in well-cut trousers. People see a waist, small bust, small face and assume that I'm a good bit lighter than I am.

Although I can not hide a large dinner 😂

I certainly couldn't hide babies. I was in maternity clothes from 8 weeks. Having arguments about my due date with know-it-all strangers by 6 months, unable to sit behind the steering wheel at 36 weeks, only able to reach the kitchen tap by standing sideways by 38 weeks and unable to get up off the sofa unassisted by 39 weeks as my body had firmly had enough of gaining 50% of my bodyweight in 4½ months 🤣 (9st to 8st 7 to13st in 9 months is a baaad idea!)
I have a lot of spare skin to tuck away in high waists!
I hate it when the overhang pops out for a bit of freedom 😂

Having started at 9st 5 at Christmas (5ft 2) I have got to 8st 13 now. So it’s taken 2 months to lose 6lb which is what I’d expect really.

I am carrying on trying to lose weight until Easter and if I lose another 2-3 pounds to get close to 8 st 10 I’d be v pleased. Will then aim to maintain.

Over the last 8 years or so, I find that with hard work I can get to 8st 10 and stay below 9st without too much work for about 6 months and then over the next year creep back to 9st 4 or 5. I gradually have more treats and snacks and let my portion sizes grow and the weight creeps on and I’ve I’ve stopped weighing I don’t realise. Have been through the cycle about 4 times in last 8-10 years.

This time, after Easter I plan to weigh myself fortnightly to keep an eye on things more regularly. A bit of yo-yoing by 2-3 pounds seems normal as scales maybe not 100% accurate (differ depending on where on bathroom floor) and of course under normal circumstances you might have a few days of eating more over holiday etc. Hiwever if I can keep myself from exceeding 9 st, things will be better and I want to avoid what I’ve been doing in needing to lose 8-9 lb which is very hard work. I need to keep an eye on things better after I reach my target.

I’m exactly the same BOGOF although I seem to store a lot on my upper arms too! Very annoying - I’m at peace with large legs and bum and choose clothes accordingly, but the arms are harder to hide.

And yes to enormous pregnancy bumps and being unable to hide a large dinner!

Is this just for petite women or taller but small framed?

@WombatChocolate I am exactly like this, struggle to get to where I am happy, maintain for a bit then slowly it creeps back on as I allow a few more treats or my portion sizes go up. This time it is coming off so, so slowly that once I am down to target I don't want to go up again at all. So weighing food and weekly weight check my be my life from now on.

People where a little goes a long way?

Being small framed where there's not many calories to play with between too many, enough, losing and too few (if you're a calorie counter) and where small differences in weight show up easily.

I can imagine small-framed people that are longer can have the same issues as us in keeping to their happy zone, having little hiding space and having to be patient about seeing results 🙂

We tend to find it hard on many of the other support chats as our goals are much more modest, and can take months to achieve in what others can fluctuate by in a week (it's all relative!)

Yesterday DH and I both did a 5k easy run. We then went to the gym. He burned twice as many active calories as me because 6ft man. Plus his bonus 500 per day to survive. Alas our appetites are not proportioned accordingly!
Last night I cut my burrito in half rather than eating my usual ¾ of it and saved half for today and served some salad from my pre-prepared tub with it.

I've been on self destruct mode all week, I've not been able to run thanks to a dodgy leg and the bike and cross trainer just are not a good replacement. I've been in a bad mood so I've just been eating anything and everything, full on self destruct which I have a tendency to do.

Today I woke up just feeling a bit yuck so I sacked off the gym and tidied and cleaned the house whilst keeping my feet up a lot!

Hoping to try out a run this week, that might make the self destruct button less easy to push...

It's just under 5 weeks until my half marathon and then I'm straight onto training for a 20 mile and then a full marathon so I doubt I'll be losing any weight but hoping I can turn my fat to muscle if I'm sensible with my eating.