I have been trying to lose weight for 20 years and yet today I am the biggest I have ever been. Anyone want to join me in a last ditch attempt to make this elusive lifestyle change?

[Believeinyou]

I'm really really trying not to be self critical and get into self hatred as I do believe the latest science e.g. the obesity code etc

i also know how to do it and what works for me (in the short term). But yet i take an age to get started....false starts and then get into a flow and lose a significant amount of weight....3-5 stones usually. Then slip, slip abit more, fall entirely off the wagon. Put even more weight on and then take a year to get back into the right frame of mind to start again.

I'm approaching the right mindset again but I really think I'm going to have to consider surgery if I can't do it this time. I know it's a lifestyle choice etc etc but as of yet I haven't had the mental fortitude to do it and keep
doing it. I have some barriers (excuses) to overcome but I am so sick of this weight - more mentally to be honest than physically.

For once I am starting right now - weighed myself in prep for starting after my birthday but I'm so scared by the current number that I have started right now. Skipped dinner and having a black coffee. Normally I spend a few weeks eating like shit because so know I am starting a diet (which is soooo messed up and disordered).

so have a goal to lose 5lbs (5 stone feels too much right now) which will bring me below my highest weight ever and will take it from there.

Anyone else want to join?

Day 2 for me and going ok. Though I said I'm doing a diet I'm calorie counting so I guess I am! I like the idea of not banning anything but making it fit into the day. Though I did have a slice of low cal toast and then couscous for dinner. Going to try and just have carbs for either lunch or dinner, not both. Or breakfast if I have it.

My job is also sedentary. How do people manage 10k?! I walked for ages today and still only hit 6!

*not doing a diet

I'm up for this.

I have been getting steadily bigger for nearly 20 years now. I'm actually nearly six stone heavier than I was 20 years ago, gained it gradually bit by bit. I think I hovered at 12-13 stone for many years but peri menopause and a back problem added another couple of stone. I've never really lost much weight just had good intentions and obsessive researching then get overwhelmed with emotional stuff and find I can't do it.

I'm just so so fed up of the waste of my life. I avoid stuff and feel shit all the time - physically and mentally.

Also worried about the potential health issues.

I'll be 50 next year. I don't want to hit 50 and be like this.

I'll be doing a mix of intermittent fasting, eating according to the principles of The Obesity Code and We Why Eat So Much, and walking with a bit of Yoga.

I fit my steps in at work. Do the bigger jobs of jobs which involve lots of walking to far flung corners! Then 2 x dog walks

This week have lost 3lbs since Sunday weigh in! V pleased with that ( I weigh daily) just under 2 stone gone since I started cal counting end of March.

well done @GirlCrushxxx that's a great result!

yes mini goals for me I think this time as saying 5 stone it's just massive and i sometimes catch myself thinking fuck it i have a massive amount to lose so a bag of m&ms is a drop in the ocean

what i have learned is that sugar is really really bad for me - chocolate in particular. I have no off switch - can't just have one small choc bar or 2 choc biscuits. They make me hungry so I eat more and then I start wanting KFC and stuff like that which I do t even enjoy that much. So i can give chocolate up and the rest of the craving for crap disappears and I'm good and enjoy the food i am eating. It looks prettier, tastes fresh, doesn't give me reflux or wind, if I get the balance right fills me up and I stop snacking eventually. But then I have 'a small treat' cos i've done so well and even though i don't come off the wagon immediately it leads to another less small treat until I think fuck it and binge.

I have always thought i could get to the point where i could have a small treat without it messing up everything but I
am looking seriously at whether i can give chocolate up for life as I genuinely think I'm addicted. I can take or leave alcohol really easily and easily have it in moderation and on 'special occasions' only without it impacting on my health or life and I know some people really really struggle to moderate their drinking and sometimes the only way is for an alcoholic to abstain forever so maybe I need to do this with chocolate? If i think about it my weight has impacted me- I have no nice clothes that fit so am not
going nice places, have lost touch with friends over the years because i've been too heavy and embarrassed about my weight gain so declined meet ups, don't like to get in photos with my children and can't look at my wedding g photos

so here i am day 3 - my book has arrived so going to read that and try a longer fast today

hope everyone else is ok

Steps - Kayla Cox has a youtube channel about intermittent fasting (I think she does OMAD - one eating small eating window a day) -she lost over 80lbs and she did 14000 steps everyday inside her house! She said she knew she would always find some excuse not to do it outside the house so she just committed to getting those steps in indoors.

Cravings - How about a built in cheat day or cheat meal? Like for example, stick to plan and then have Sunday Lunch where you don't count or measure anything, eat pudding etc, and then Monday it's back on the wagon. Works for some.

Other useful books for mindset are Atomic Habits by James Clear and Master the Day by Alexander Heynes. All about the compound interest of habits both good and bad. How not to give up, how to stop the all or nothing mindset.

Hearing you and same here!

I don't think I've already posted here, apologies if I have. Not sure if you have it in your area, but the NHS run a free 12 week course for weight loss. You go to a class each week, they weigh you and each week is a talk on a different topic about healthy eating, from nutritional values to portion sizes. I did the course six years ago and lost 5 stones (over the following 18m) but put it all back on after a trauma.

You can self refer and I've started again, week 2 was last night. Lost weight in the first week and forgot how easy it actually is.

Could you look for a similar programme? I just googled and found my local one. My group is full of people in exactly the same boat as me and its very encouraging.

Good luck OP!

I am also on last ditch attempt!
I am biggest I have ever been at currently 18 ish stone.
For the last week and a bit I have been calorie counting and saving to fat secret app and it has really helped me.
I can't go on like this and letting food control me.

So I'm being good food wise this week but not so much with the exercise!

Work is very stressful at the minute & I have an hour long commute so get home, have dinner, tidy up a bit then bed as mentally knackered! But I start my new job in 2 weeks which is 2 miles away from my front door so once I get settled in I intend to walk whenever the weather allows (Scotland so definitely won't be everyday ).

Thinking I'll also start C25K once I'm settled in new job & have a better routine in place.

I agree with small targets as at the minute 3 & a half stone seems a huge amount so I'm going to make smaller monthly targets.

thanks for the encouragement and shari g your thoughts with me

been shopping this morning with youngest so instead of my usual dawdle i walked with pace with the pushchair which actually was better because i got all the chores done way quicker and DD didn't. get bored and moany. Also didn't have a stop for coffee and cake as usual.

Took DD to the park for her lunch and I just had water as trying to do 16:8 but do want to close the fasting gap so am trying 2-8pm window today and just settled with a tuna salad now DD is asleep. Actually didn't feel too hungry either

my friend swears by fasting for health and weight control - she says it's like sex. The longer you go without, the less you want ...

I've just weighed myself and I've lost 5lbs since Saturday. Very very happy with that. Only another 5 and a half stone to go!

I get backache around my lower back when I walk because of my weight and end up having to use a hot water bottle. Want to lose a whole stone to see if it helps to reduce the pain as I'd like to start walking the pounds off.

Agee that fasting is helpful, if only to literally reduce the amount of time I have to cram food in my mouth, so loosely trying to stick to 16:8 and doing ok so far. Still too scared to weigh myself. Anyone got a good ‘it’s crap right now but the only way is up’ type weigh in mantras?!

I haven't weighed myself for two years and that was at work and I was 18 stone ish. I don't have scales, I find weighing myself doesn't help my mindset.
But one way to look at it is today will be the last time you see those numbers however scary!

Typed a big reply and it vanished
Short version
I thought I'd given up trying to lose weight but maybe not?

Curious to hear re the book. All the explanations in the world have never helped me and this can't be different?

Have lost 4lb over a month but that might be stress related.

Have I killed the thread? Anyone there?

Good morning! No not killed thread 😀 If the book you mean is why we eat (too much) then I have to say I’m a bit disappointed overall. Some bits about why dieting is counterproductive were convincing (and depressing!) but the section on what to actually do read like just another diet. No sugar, cut out wheat and corn. Don’t eat things with omega 6. Feels so similar to other ways of eating that just work by restricting what we can eat. I think I’m going to try to stick to 16:8 and better choices about carbs and sugar.

Thank you Cotton

I want to concentrate on eating less, and less often.

one of the weirdest things for me is looking at photos from 3 stone ago. I don't think I look that different. If I thought I could get skinny, I'd be more motivated, but that hasn't been the case since I was 19. I am now 46!

I do feel I waddle, and can't walk quickly, which is embarrassing.

I thought I had given up too. I have been to every slimming club and tried tablets from GP. But I know I have a food addiction. 2 patients have commented on my weight in the last year and it has devastated me. First time I went home and ate vast amounts 2nd time a few weeks ago I thought no something had to change so started calorie counting on an app called fat secret. Being over weight affects me in so many ways. I hate going out as have nothing to wear. I send my adult children on holiday on their own as I can't bear to go with them because of what others might think. When I am alone all I think is good what can I eat. I hide food and wrappers.
It is not going to be easy to lose but I need to try. I have about 6 stone to lose. I don't actually weigh myself though as it messes with my head but I have stuck to it and every day is a brand new day to make a difference.
What's everyones plans for today?

Yes I understand. I don't have scales but could go to Boots or use the ones at work.

I would love to look at those accounts thanks for your help 😊

@Sunshineandrainbow I completely agree with the scales thing! We've never had scales in the house until Monday because with 2 girls I didn't think it was healthy to be weighing myself & talking about diets constantly.

The temptation to just hop on every time I'm in the bathroom is also not great - I've set an alarm on my phone for Sunday at 10am to weigh myself & take my measurements each week & will be trying not to weigh myself any other time.

I'm not aiming for a diet as such more getting back to a healthier lifestyle & the old fashioned "eat less, move more" as this is what works best for me.

I have a holiday booked for June 2023 & my final goal is to get into a bikini I last wore on holiday in 2017 but until then I'll be setting small goals each month. These won't all be weight related either (one will be to increase my water intake, alongside this I'll be trying to cut out fizzy drinks - I can get through a 24 pack of irn-bru in a weekend I've also deleted just eat etc from my phone as it's far too easy after a long day to just order takeaways - this will also save money!

I have also joined several weight loss threads before and here i am, still fat and miserable!

I was looking for the summer school uniform this week and I was horrified by the amount of huge bags of my own clothes that I have that don’t fit that I have kept thinking this time next year that will fit me etc… some of these clothes are probably 15 years old!

I also know exactly how to lose weight and I enjoy exercising too, I really don’t know why I keep failing, but would really love to lose about 6 stone over the next year which is a sensible weight loss of about half a stone a month.

Thank you for replies
I really feel for everyone

I am of the weird school that would say "but I am not overeating". Clearly I must be though. What really annoys me is that when I stick rigidly to a diet, I lose about half a pound a week, if I'm lucky.

I have given away a lot of thin clothes. One neighbour saw me at the charity shop. I stupidly told her what the bags were. She said she'd lost loads at my age, but then proceeded to tell me what she eats. I am not prepared to live that way!

My plan for today is just to eat mindfully. I like to work out and am doing that today. It's not a hardship but I can't start intensive weight training again as it makes me ragingly hungry.

Officially I am about 4 stone overweight, size 18 from belly down. Very short.

I saw myself on those awful cameras at the Aldi checkout - what are they for? - and I was a bit shocked as I thought I had made peace with how I look.