Self-care journey

[Startingover37]

As my username suggests, I feel like I'm 'starting over' at 37. Like a lot of people, the past 18mths have led to some unhealthy behaviours mostly overeating, and the closure of gyms and classes (which really work for me) hasn't helped. I am currently around 15 stone.
I can't just blame covid as my weight has slowly crept over the last few years and I fluctuate between getting really into eating healthy, losing weight and then, thinking Feck it, life's too short, eat the cake, drink the wine! I need a healthy balance and a better relationship with food.
I have realised that for me, overfocussing on food and on the scales sends me backwards....simply looking after myself better leads to me feeling better, having more energy and in turn losing weight. I know food is so important in that but for me, focussing on the self-care side seems to have helped before.
So, I'm posting this, both as accountabilty for myself and to see if any like-minded people want to join me on my journey? I hope so!
Starting simple this week...

1. Drink 2l of water each day
2. Walk 10,000 steps per day
3. At least 3 self-care activities per week e.g. a nice bath, paint my nails...anything that makes me feel better in my own body.

Any other suggestions welcome! Genuinely look forward to hearing from anyone in a similar boat!

I'm at the beach at the moment. I'm really enjoying looking for birds, watching the sea, and smelling the air. I'm also walking far more than usual. I haven't managed any formal meditation/tai chi or anything, but do think the environment lends itself to mindfulness.

I could have written your post @picklemewalnuts. I’m currently on holiday on the Welsh coast, doing exactly the same thing. Something very soothing about watching the waves and seeing all the birds flying around!

I’m sorry some of you are feeling low. I hope it will pass soon 😔 I’m not going to pretend that mindfulness makes everything better, but sometimes it really helps me to just spend 5 minutes outside and listen to and watch whatever nature things are going on around me. Butterflies, bees, birds, it’s all good for taking the mind of things.

@picklemewalnuts @Crazzzycat I completely agree the effect of getting out into nature, especially by the sea but out in nature in general. For me, I walk in the forest nearly every morning, I started a few years ago when I was going through a bit of a hard time. I used to feel awful when I got there and by the time, I was finished, I felt so much calmer and at peace. The things I was dealing with felt more manageable.
Obviously, not in every case but for me, I really think nature is one of our most powerful medicines, an antidote to all the time we spend indoors and looking at a screen. If I stop, even for a week or two, I really notice the difference.
I am away next week to spend sometime by the sea and I can not wait!
Enjoy your break away ladies.
Hope everyone is feeling a little better x

A break by the sea sounds bliss! I agree about nature. The sea is a huge healer for me, but even a few minutes watching the bumble bees or the birds helps me too.

I'm about to snuggle up and head to bed for an early night. I was going to watch some netflix but I find I can never stop at one episode so I'm best of steering clear!

The things that see a quick result are so much easier to implement, IMO. My skincare routine, my skin looks much better and I look less tired, so it's easier to keep up.

How are you getting on with the healthier food, @Startingover37 ? Would it be easier to think smaller, break it down a bit? Perhaps plan to have healthy Mondays and Fridays, or healthy lunches?

We might have a swim later, if we can summon up the energy! We've done a big walk across the cliffs today, so we're resting in the cool dark lounge now before heading out again.

@picklemewalnuts I totally agree about the habits where results are seen quickly being easier to stick to. For me, that's exercise. I feel a massive increase in my fitness and feel myself getting stronger and more energetic and able so I'm really determined to stick with it!

Yes, food wise, I'm not doing too badly now thanks. I haven't cut out chocolate but have really cut back. I don't buy anything in a multi-pack now, just one bar if I feel like it. There's still room for improvement but I'm feeling a lot better.

My meals are not too bad, as in they are not really unhealthy. I just don't plan properly and end up wasting food. My lack of planning has definitely got bad over the past 18mths...it was never a huge issue before. I'm so aware that I'm wasting food and money too so need to sort it! A Mon to Fri plan is a good idea.

This thread has really woken me up to how much more organised and in control I used to feel and I want to keep working on getting back to that.

Sounds like you are having a lovely day, enjoy!

Actually I might break my food down. Start with lunches then do breakfasts the next week. I get overwhelmed trying to think of healthy dinners, especially as we have so many fussy eaters (including me!) and a child who cannot deal with new textures or flavours so the pool of dinners from which to choose is very small! Then I find we get bored of eating the same foods so frequently and end up either ordering or having something beige from the freezer. It's a frustrating cycle to be in.
@Startingover37 you sound like you're doing really well, both with food and exercise.

I'm really good at food planning and food problems, Meadow! Shout if you want to brainstorm. I started with a 'nothing must touch, food must be dry' eater, and now he eats pretty much everything except mushroom, aubergine and courgette. It was a challenge, but we got there.

Hi everyone, been a bit absent, sorry. Good to read e eryones positive posts, definitely agree with all the getting out into nature stuff, today I was getting irrationally angry over nothing really, often this would have resulted in eating a load of rubbish, today I chose to spend 5 mins in the garden, worked like a charm!
For me this week I've been focusing on getting lots of colour on my plates and really making a full meal for the senses and also eating when hungry rather than when the clock dictates.

Oh we're a nightmare @picklemewalnuts - some dont eat fish or meat except for chicken and sausages, others wont eat mash or jacket spuds, no spice for some, some have everything with ketchup and preferably chips, vegetables cant be mixed in with the pasta or rice 🤯
I've started following The Batch Lady on facebook and I am thinking of batch making meals that will suit us all and freezing it in individual portions so we can pull out meals that dont all need to be the same, and it saves me having to cook 2/3 different things in one evening. Not a perfect solution but it might help!

Hi @ElvenDreamer! When I was ill recently and not able to really go anywhere, I found stepping into the garden a real life saver. I agree also with eating when hungry. I've not been feeling hugely hungry recently but Im forcing myself to eat because everyone else is ready for dinner. Its a frustrating cycle to be in

Hi all!

Weekend check in time. I hope everyone has had a great week.

Mine has been ok. Again, good on the exercise front, keeping up with the meditation, sleep is going ok (not great but not bad either), I'm reading, walking and listening to more music. I have made a decent start on cleaning the house too.

So, not too bad but I'm still not back in the zone re food. I think like @MeadowLines I get a bit over whelmed with food planning, preparation etc. I don't mind cooking in itself and can cook to a basic standard but I just find it so repetitive. I have loads of cookery books but I tend to cook the same stuff over and over. (If someone handed me a plate of healthy, varied food for each meal, I would happily eat and enjoy it, I'm not really fussy.) But my head gets a bit frazzled sometimes and cooking seems like an extra stress on top of everything else, and I just stick with the same stuff but then, I get sick of it!

I am away for a few days by the sea next week. My friend said to me be sure to relax ...and I honestly can't remember the last time I felt truely relaxed. Hoping the few days away might help.

Sorry that turned into a real ramble.

Have a good week everyone

I hope you have a lovely break @Startingover37!

I’ve been having a bit of a frustrating week. For some reason, I’ve been starting to get really impatient about the speed of my weight loss, which is a little odd as I’ve been losing quite a lot in a reasonably short time, so I don’t really have anything much to complain about. I just don’t feel like my body has changed. I know it’s all in my head, but I just can’t stop thinking that I should see more of a result by now. May be it’s because I’ve been doing this for a few months now and am just getting a bit bored?

Anyway, I’ve concluded that it’s time to come up with a new plan. I’m not sure what that’s going to look like yet, but there will definitely be less focus on weight. I think I really need to remind myself of why I’m doing this, i.e. to feel healthier, not to see a certain number on the scales. I’ll report back when I have a plan 😄

Hi all, an up and down week, I've had some days where I've felt quite irrationally angry and that has driven me to emotional snacking, those days were a bit out of left field so I was un prepared for that! Otherwise foodwise it's been not too bad. Have been trying to plan nice lunches etc as well as the cooked meals and then sit down and really appreciate them and it does make a difference over how satisfied I feel. @Startingover37 I used to dread the whole meal planning bit etc, I'm not fond of cooking at all although like you O have a lot of recipe books which I actually enjoy browsing! A while ago I got myself into a habit of finding an evening I wasn't too busy, settling myself in with pen, paper and all my books around me and doing a plan for anything between 4 and 7 weeks. (Often I'd plan a half term's worth because it seemed to make sense.) I have a vague outline I stick to with things like meat free Monday, fish twice a week or a second veggie day, red meat only once etc and then ring the changes with the recipes, noting the meal and book/pg number on my plan for ease of shopping. I quite enjoy it and it's certainly giving us variation.
This week I plan to focus a bit more on some of my hobbies etc, If I'm busy, I tend not to absent mindedly graze the fridge so much . Plus some, like gardening, keep me active too 🙂 Have a good week everyone.

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about my little diet wobble overnight (who needs sleep, right?😂). I’ve concluded that my frustration isn’t so much about the changes I’m seeing in my body. It’s to do with the numbers on the scales.

I’ve basically been weighing myself far too often. It’s not healthy (for me) and obviously I’m unlikely to see big changes from one day to another!

So here’s the plan I’ve come up with:

1: hide the scales until the end of the month
2: for the next few weeks use only fitness and nutrition goals and forget about weightloss goals. I’m thinking of using this American healthy eating plate as a guide for nutrition
3: take progress pictures once a month. I reckon that will be a much less frustrating way to track progress
4: reorganise my wardrobe, so that I’m actually wearing clothes that fit, not ones that are one or two sizes too big. My DH pointed out to me that I’m basically hiding my progress from myself by still wearing baggy size 16 tops, when I’m more of a 12-14. I think he’s on to something 🙈

I’m feeling good about this (if a little sleep deprived!)

@Crazzzycat your dh makes a good point, maybe you could buy a few pieces to help you feel better about your losses so far.
Also you make a good point about weighing too often. I followed a plan before where you weighed every day but it was plotted on a graph and the average weight loss for the week was worked ojt. The science behind it did make sense, but now Im not pumping iron and pounding the streets as I was on that plan, it just means I get used to seeing the same few numbers going up and down each day. If I weigh once a month then hopefully I can stop it being a part of the habit and not caring about the result. Oh, also well done for coming up with a plan!

@ElvenDreamer I wish I could be so organised!! How frequently do you repeat meals within those 7 weeks or so? I love the idea of being so organised. I think I will put it to the family that we'll have a meat free day etc and try and bring some variety into our meals - I am craving it!
Snacking is one of my downfalls too, and itsso hard to stop, esp when emotionally charged! - I wonder if I should try and go cold turkey to stop the snacks.

@Startingover37 enjoy your break away, it sounds bliss! I've decided Im going to work on food variety, then bite the bullet and do some batch cooking to take the repetitive nature out of it all. If someone doesnt like it, me included, they can make themselves beans on toast!

@MeadowLines I don't repeat any main meals in the roughly 6 week plan. My husband does weekend cooking so there is occasionally some repetition there, but not much to be fair, eg he always likes to cook curry but has a large repertoire within that! Lunches I will have a couple of different interesting salad recipes per week so will therefore eat the same thing a couple of days in the same week. Breakfasts I don't plan as such but we have a repertoire of a few things so we aren't just having cereal or toast every day.

@Crazzzycat I think focusing on wardrobe rather than scales is an excellent plan, I've got rid of a few things recently that just don't suit me and am focusing on wearing things that make me feel good. It definitely can make a difference to my mood, if I feel good I tend to be more active and eat better too.

Hi all, just catching up on your posts.

@Crazzzycat It sounds like you have a great plan for moving forward. Too much focus on the scales will only lead to dissappointment. Totally agree with your husband too that you won't really see or feel the change if you are in the same clothes you always wore. How is the wardrobe reshuffle going??

@ElvenDreamer I'm with you on the hobbies, being busy rather than sitting around improves my mood too and I snack less. How have you been getting on with the gardening etc? Is it making a difference?

@MeadowLines We sound very similar, in terms of snacking and needing variety in meals. How have you been getting in with it all?

I had a lovely break away. The weather was nice and even better here since we got back. I did some walking but ate and drank without thinking of any plan etc. I think, while I might have undone some of the progress I was making, I think I needed it. Just to relax a bit and not put pressure on myself. I have done a lot of thinking (about everything really but also, my relationship with food) and feel more positive to get back on track again.

Hope the sun is shining for you all!

Hi @Startingover37, your break away sounds divine! So glad you got to relax and spend some time on introspection. I find spending time reflecting on my feelings very helpful, even if I dont like the part of me I discover, I feel better for having got to know myself better!

My food has been so-so. I have been listening to my body more, eating less frequently and not such a big quantity. I've also upped my water.
I'm also going through a bit of a flare up with my health condition so I've been doing my best around that. I'm working on being kinder to myself around that, and on speaking to myself in a nicer way when I need to rest.

When I stood on the scales I was down 2lbs but I am trying not to weigh myself now until the end of July.

@ElvenDreamer I wish I had such a wide repertoire of meals I could cook for us all to not have any real repetition in 6 weeks! I am going to gently work on trying new things for all of us and hope to find a few new ingredients/meals we can use!

It is sweltering today. Good in terms of drinking water, not so good because dh proudly brought me home a box of baileys ice cream cones!

Hi all, oh my goodness this weather, meltingly hot. Food wise it's made me have a major wobble as when I am too hot I just want to do nothing, then because I'm doing nothing I want to snack! I'm hoping to give myself a bit of a reset next week as we're off to Lake District for a week so I won't be able to graze cupboards and we always do lots and lots of hiking etc so will be doing plenty of exercise and getting my fill of nature, the best medicine. Trying to get house super clean and tidy before we go as coming back to a clean house is a good feeling after a holiday and starts me off on the right foot!
How is everyone else doing?

@ElvenDreamer I hope you have a great time on your holidays! Sounds fabulous.

I am the very same, I love the sun and enjoy the warm weather but have been having so many icecreams, cold cans of coke etc. Reading my book in the sun has been 'self-care' for this week!

I have definitely undone a bit of my progress but I have decided that I'm going to buckle down for the next 6 weeks. I am doing well with exercise, meditation, even sleep is ok and I'm feeling quite good in myself BUT realistically, until I get control of the food situation, I am not going to lose weight. I have been talking about food planning etc but my exercise, meditation, walks have been more of a priority and I havn't really put much effort in to the food side of things. I get overwhelmed with choices...should I do 16:8 or other methods and end up doing nothing!

I think realistically, if I meal plan 3 healthy meals per day and stick to it, cut out all sugary snacks, and drink my 2l water, I should see some positive changes. Back to basics for me this week!

How is everyone else getting on?

I'm struggling in the heat a bit, I really dont like it. I've also had a flare up of my chronic condition so I've done barely anything and I feel yeuk.
I'm the same with food @Startingover37 and I have made a similar decision re 3 meals and cut out the junk. I think it will help my condition as well, hopefully!
I feel very tired and lack any energy or motivation to do anything at the mo

Ah @MeadowLines I'm really sorry to hear that you're not feeling well. Must be hard when you are unwell and have this unreal heat to contend with on top of it! Take care of yourself x

Yes, I'm hoping that cutting out sugar (I know it's impossible to do 100% but cutting way back ) will make such a difference to my health and mood in general too.

Hope you start to feel better soon

Thanks @Startingover37

I definitely think a form of batch cooking, or cook once and eat twice type meals will help when I cant think of another thing to eat. Even with small variations - chilli with jacket spuds one day and rice another sort of thing.

@MeadowLines Hope you are doing ok.
I'm feeling a lot more confident for the week ahead. Like you said, cook once, eat twice is such a good idea esp with the hot weather. I have a good shopping done for the week and am feeling more organised and on top of things.
🤞 Fingers crossed for the week ahead!

Im glad you're feeling good for the week ahead @Startingover37 and have a good shop in.

Im feeling better, but still quite tired. Hopefully it'll ease in a day or two and I can start to make some changes and get on top of it all again