If you are slim, please tell me how the conversation in your head goes

[whatisheupto]

If you are over the age of 38 and reasonably slim / not overweight, please tell me this:

An hour or two after dinner when you really fancy a bit of toast, do you tell yourself "no" and force yourself to resist the urge? When your brain nags you again, do you give it a firm "no" until and tell it to go away?
When you really want a small bowl of cornflakes before bed, do you just stop yourself and ignore the hunger pangs? Do you tell yourself "come on, you can do this. Think how good you'll feel tomorrow"

Do you tell yourself these things every day? For years? And rarely give in to temptation?

Or do you just never usually fancy a piece of toast or a late bowl of cornflakes? So it's just not a problem for you?

Are slim people better at self control, or are they just experiencing fewer urges?

Or do you just never usually fancy a piece of toast or a late bowl of cornflakes? So it's just not a problem for you?
This. I honestly never feel hungry after dinner. I don't finish dinner until 8/8.30 though so 3 hours later I am usually asleep!

This is a really interesting thread. Amazing how much it's about habit, and it sounds like even those who resist urges have kind of 'trained' themselves to do it as a strict ethos and it's now a habit for them.

To be honest I always have toast or cereal or a snack before bed. Dinner is usually 6ish so I'm starving again at 10 or 11pm. I can't abide going to bed hungry.

I don't tend to snack during the day and have healthy meals most of the time. I'm also quite active so that does help too.

An hour or two after dinner when you really fancy a bit of toast, do you tell yourself "no" and force yourself to resist the urge?

An hour or two? I think you're not eating enough at proper meals.

I'm (very) old and slim, and being old and slim does come with a price tag. You have to accept being a little bit hungry sometimes. The only thing I eat if I'm starving between meals is fruit, but apart from that I don't do snacks - and I think because I absolutely don't do them and never have, I would never even start imagining a bit of toast or whatever.

I also never eat breakfast. I've never enjoyed breakfast. Some schools of thought say this is wrong but it's never been a problem for me . I have dinner 7pm them so long as I'm busy at work, won't eat again until 12/1pm.

If I'm not busy though it's easier to pick.

Thank you all for your honesty. It's good to know that a lot of people are making conscious decisions about it all the time, but also that once you get into the habit, it just becomes normal. I think for me, I had a lot of restrictions going on in other parts of my life, so eating what I wanted felt liberating and as if I was in control (especially as growing up we were not allowed much in the way of treats). Also yes pregnancy and breast feeding definitely changed my habits and I probably carried on with those habits a bit too long!

I'm 44, BMI under 20. Whenever I'm hungry I eat, very lucky I guess. However, I don't eat grains and most dairy due to a health condition so that rules out most snack food. So it's usually leftovers from tea, not very tempting and also generally low carb/high fat so very satiating. Lots of dark chocolate though.

I tend to snack more at about 5-6pm when kids have tea so I have something like humous/breadsticks, or nuts. Dinner is later, 8-9pm and after that I'll usually have a bit of chocolate.

I am quite lucky with a fairly fast metabolism and tallish/slim build.

I think I generally have quite good self control and do have a running internal tracker of what I've been snacking on. If I feel I am getting a bit heavier than I would like then I don't find it too hard to cut out the biscuits or chocolate for a week.

I made a rule years ago that I do not eat after 6:00pm. I just don’t deviate. On the rare occasion I’m hungry before bed I’ll have a cup of tea as it then feels like I’m consuming.

I eat small portions (I use smaller plates and bowls). If I want a snack between meals I’ll decant 3-4 crisps into a bowl and walk into another room. I’m too lazy to go back to the kitchen so that helps me eat less. I think small portions are key: my coworker is twice my size and she’ll frequently eat 3 hotdogs at lunch or 3 slices of pizza, I’ll have one (not that I eat hotdogs, but I love pizza).

Final thing is that if it’s something higher in calories it has to be worth it. I’m not eating the nasty sheet cake from the supermarket just because someone’s retired at work and they’ve bought it for a work do. I’m just not tempted by things I won’t enjoy.

I wouldn't consider having toast between meals as it's not a snack.

My breakfast this morning was one piece of toast. That is not a snack.

I eat three meals a day and try to eat fruit or nuts outside those times if I feel peckish.

I aim for my five a day and see being able to eat an apple at 11am or 3pm as a step towards my five a day. So not as delicious as a packet of crisps but pleasing as I know it's good for me.

I do however also grab thee jelly babies, or two biscuits, with a cup of tea at 4pm.

I think thinking in terms of nutrients is helpful - I am always looking to maximise the nutrients in what I eat. (Having said that sometimes I will have three bags of crisps and a lump of cheese for dinner).

I’ve just had a crumpet. I think about whether I’m genuinely hungry and if I am, I eat something.

@Ritascornershop I love that rule... just not eating after 6pm. I have been trying something similar and must say the simplicity of it seems to work for me.

I’m over 38 and in the ‘normal’ weight category but I could afford to lose a few pounds.
I spend most evenings trying to resist. Tonight for example I had 2 jammie dodgers after dinner and nothing else.
I drank about 2 pints of water in the following 3 hours and I’m now in bed, tummy making rumbling noises.
Tonight I’ve done well.
On a Friday night I’ll have wine instead of snacking and Saturday is a write off.
Sunday - Thursday I’m good.

I am rubbish at resisting hunger cravings so I try to eat well at meals to prevent them. I did try eating smaller meals for a bit but found it was seriously counterproductive because I'd invariably end up eating something less healthy later. What works for me (or did until lockdown drastically cut my exercise) is trying to eat loads of fruit and veg at meals and snack on fruit and veg. I aim for 10 a day and am happy to hit 8. Having healthy food that I like in stock makes it easier too.

I do have the occasional late night snack - if I'm hungry at bedtime I'll probably end up lying awake hungry in the middle of the night and the worse I sleep the worse my eating gets. But I try to go for a banana or a glass of milk rather than a bowl of cereal.

So for me it's not about willpower but trying to make it easy for myself to eat healthily.

Don't get hunger pangs in the evening unless I've not eaten properly that day.
Starving when I wake up, tend to eat meals every 4 hours with a snack in between but no longer hungry by about 6/7pm.
Drink loads of fluids.

I eat a fresh pescatarian diet but do eat treats. My portions are a healthy size and balanced.

I feel peckish now but I wont go and get any food. It isn't self control but I just don't feel the urge to get anything to eat. I guess feeling peckish to me doesn't equate to getting food. I do do a small fast on a Monday so I guess I am use to it.

The killer for me is that I eat dinner with the kids at 5.30 and I then have to ‘resist’ until bedtime at 10.30. That’s a long time!

I should add that timing of mealtimes can be a factor too - we used to have dinner 7-8ish and I was very rarely hungry at bedtime/in the night, but now we eat at 6 with DS which definitely has an impact.

I’m now in bed, tummy making rumbling noises.
Tonight I’ve done well.

That just sounds so miserable.

I'm thin, a size 8 and 5ft 8.
I dont really get hungry, but if I do I always eat. I tend not to have mealtimes as such, more I wait until im hungry to actually eat my meals.

Theres also a real difference between actually being hungry and thinking you're hungry aka cfancying" a snack. The latter goes away if you ignore it for a bit and you cant physically feel it. learning the difference to start with is a big thing.

I am always hungry and deny myself food multiple times most days. This has been the case pretty much since puberty. I have always been a healthy BMI, but it takes a huge amount of effort to maintain this.

Sometimes I will go through a period of time where I just can’t be bothered to restrict so much and my weight will drift up quickly. This has happened recently as I was ill with covid for a couple of months and couldn’t face cooking or be bothered to worry about what I was eating so much. Recently realised I had gained 10lbs so now I am sticking to strictly under 1200 calories a day until I can get back down to my usual weight.

And yes to nutrients. I aim for 7 - 10 portions of veg and fruit a day. You can eat a lot more that way.

I am always hungry. I feel low self worth. I am happy when I deprive myself. People say I look lovely. I am not. I was lovely when I was chubby and happy. People don’t know how being deeply unhappy makes you not want to eat because you are not worth it. Have a drink instead

@InspectorCludo I think I am really glad to hear that you and other posters think about it a lot and 'spend most evenings trying to resist'! That's what I needed to hear. It sounds like you are pulling off a good intermittent fast each day.

@IceniSky I love the fact that you feel peckish but don't have the urge to go and get any food! That sounds great.

I’d have the toast

Or the cereal

I just had a glass of nesquick and a small bowl of salted peanuts

I pretty much have what I like, but some days I’ll just have a nice cup of tea instead and that does the job too

Am not skinny but have a healthy bmi. I eat what I like (but try to make healthy choices about 80-90% of the time) And yes, I had the nesquick and the peanuts but I could have had the same again but only then do I tell myself “that was enough”

I Don’t think that speaking to yourself harshly is in any way productive. If you want toast, maybe just have the one slice, and maybe have wholemeal. Something like that.