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Weight loss chat

A space to talk openly about weight loss journeys and challenges. Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. You may wish to speak to a medical professional before starting any diet.

So what am I doing wrong?

125 replies

pinkbasket · 18/09/2010 15:25

In the last 2-3 years I have put on 2-3 stone almost without realising it. I have been exercising on and off for about 4 months and trying to eat better. I haven't lost a thing. My weight is up and down and I am just so fed with it all.

OP posts:
encyclogirl · 20/09/2010 14:02

PB, I got my scales in Lidl and they're fab!

PS: Dont forget, you need to always look for the full fat options on low carb. Not the low carb.

pinkbasket · 20/09/2010 16:04

More ConfusedBlush.

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pinkbasket · 20/09/2010 17:01

I am feeling really sick today. It is warm, I had blood taken this morning but am wondering if it is more to do with my new eating plan??

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Firsttimer7259 · 20/09/2010 20:19

Don't do this to yourself. Eat properly, at proper times. Eat more than the measly 1000-1200 cals you are eating. You can't keep that up. You will just lose weight, then put it back on as your resolve dwindles and your hunger kicks in. And then you will feel bad.

Instead:
Work out how many calories your body needs in a day.

As a woman this is your weight in kilos multiplied by 0.9. Then multiply that figure by 24. Then multiply that 0.2 - 0.5 depending on how active you are. So 0.2 if sedentary, 0.5 if active.

To lose weight you need to have a calorie deficit of 3500 to lose a pound. So work out how much less to eat per day, or decide to burn some of it off with exercise, your call. Don't believe how much exercise machines say you burnt off. They lie, check out a good website and be honest with yourself about how hard you worked. Dont set too hard a target, even if you stick with it for a few weeks, being under by 500, 800 calories a day makes your body fantasize about all the quick and easy ways to get those calories back.

Divide your calorie intake up over the day in a way that means you are eating roughly every 3 hours. Only weigh yourself once a week at most, ideally first thing in the morning.

Thats it, thats all there is to it. Obviously proper food will help you make the most of your daily calories and junk wont.

All those diet books, GI-this, low fat-that, are just variations on how you create a calorie deficit without feeling too shitty. The truth is you will feel shitty if you have too much of a calorie deficit and eventually you will crack and binge and undo all your good work. Dont be a mug, be patient, be clever, dont fall for this quick diet nonsense. You need to put less calories in than you burn off. Basta.

Also

Set some realistic goals and when you get there celebrate with something that isn't food.

PS: a realistic goal is one that's in your control. So say to yourself my goal is to exercise x amounts of times per week for x number of weeks. And when you achieve that you celebrate. Or I will drink 2 litres a day for 4 weeks or whatever. Dont make it a goal you have little control over like 'I will weigh X'.

If this doesn't work have a look at your self, your life and your friends and see who wants you fat. Maybe its you. Being fat is cosy, its friendly, gets you sympathy and lets you dodge tricky issues. Figure it out and you can work on getting thin. Otherwise decide to stay fat and enjoy it. Or even realise that you are fine as you are. Who knows? But this thing you are doing now is a waste of time.

pinkbasket · 20/09/2010 20:31

I am not looking for a quick fix. What I want to do is not eat certain things for a month and then see if I have lost any weight. If I haven't then I will tell the GP there has to be something wrong with me as atm he doesn't believe I have a thyroid problem and my other GP thinks I am lazy. I know I cant eat like this for the rest of my life. Though I don't want it now the thought of never having peanut butter on toast again or a jacket potato, pasta, mashed potato, parsnips, is just miserable.

I read Custardo's blog and this is only the second time in my life I have stuck to a plan for more than a day.

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Firsttimer7259 · 20/09/2010 20:46

So whats this?... You'd rather torture yourself not eating carbs and worry about illnesses you probably dont have than face the basic unavoidable facts about weightloss.

Why is that? what are you avoiding by obsessing about celery? Enjoy your yo-yo ride but none of this will get you sustainable weightloss.

pinkbasket · 20/09/2010 20:48

I am not torturing myself.

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BooBooGlass · 20/09/2010 20:52

If you have never stuck to a plan for more than a day then I think tbh the GP is right in not sending you for every test going. You need to want to lose weight more than you want to eat that potato. It's a basic fact, but a true one. If losing weight were easy, noone would be overweight. But you'll hear of people talk of their 'lightbulb' moment. I really believe you need the belief and the desire before you will be successful in losing weight. I don't get that feelign of determination from you. If anything, you seem defeated.

pinkbasket · 20/09/2010 21:02

You couldn't be more wrong. You don't put 3 stone on when you haven't changed your eating habits and have increased your exercise without there being something not right. I have been exercising a few times a week and have done 2 full days of following C's plan. Until I read her blog I had no idea what I should be doing. I have got my mind in the right place and I will lose weight but that doesn't stop me believing the weight went on in the first place through there being something wrong. There is a strong family history and I have had the blood tests done now.

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Firsttimer7259 · 20/09/2010 21:08

If there is something up with your health a diet plan that cuts out an entire food group is not a wise or safe choice.

pinkbasket · 20/09/2010 21:11

This is a short term plan. Cutting out sugar and bread will not do me any harm, especially as I seem to have a problem with bread. I am eating meat and fish and drinking more water.

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Firsttimer7259 · 20/09/2010 21:18

So will you be eating other carbs? Pasta? Rice? Potatoes? Fruits? I thought you were trying no carbs, not just no actual sugar and bread?

What exactly such a no-carb is supposed to prove apart from being a sort of bizarre endurance test, really puzzles me. Yes you will lose absurd amounts of weight really quickly, but surely somewhere in there you all know thats not how the story ends..

Besides its you who's saying you feel sick and weak and could it be to do with your new eating plan. I call that torturing yourself.

pinkbasket · 20/09/2010 21:25

I am doing no carbs.

Of course I am going to feel weird when I suddenly cut down on the amount and variety I am eating. I was merely asking if it was because of my new plan and not because of something else being wrong. I do have other things wrong but they won't be made worse by careful eating. I don't expect to lose loads and generally I could eat as I liked and my weight would stay the same within 1/2 a stone. I have put these extra stone on without realising really as I have been busy with lots of things to take much notice of my weight. Someone else actually brought up that I had a problem and it makes sense to have it checked out.

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Firsttimer7259 · 20/09/2010 21:32

No carbs is not 'careful eating'. It is a faddish diet gimmick.

So once again: yes you will lose weight,
no it is not sustainable. And if you think something is wrong with you healthwise then cutting out a whole food group (carbs) is not a good move, even if it is short term.

pinkbasket · 20/09/2010 21:47

I have put on weight even though I was not eating differently, therefore I do think there is something wrong especially as I have other symptoms. If I have a medical problem then it will be sorted out with medication and my weight will stabilise. In the mean time I will have got out of the habit of eating when I am not hungry and that can only be a good thing. Usually I stay a stable weight so it doesn't have to mean it is unsustainable as normally I can eat what I want and stay the same. Clearly you think what I am doing is crazy but that is your perogative.

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Firsttimer7259 · 20/09/2010 22:07

OK all I am telling you is that you are going too hard at this diet. It looks from your posts like you are trying for 1000-1200 a day. That is probably too little for you to keep up even over the space of a month or two (unless you are a wee skinny thing who doesn't need many cals).

I explained how to work out your calorie requirements in my first post.

A very low cal diet like this will also not help sorting out your eating when not hungry issue because at that kind of calorie intake your body will panic. So the most likely thing that will happen to you now is that you will stick to a v low cal plan and then break it, binge, feel bad and hey presto yo-yo. Just because over a week or two you arent feeling hungry on a v low cal diet doesnt mean your hunger wont catch up with you eventually.

The no carb thing is just a gimmick. getting the balance between food groups right is one thing, cutting a food group out - just stop and think for a minute!

But you want to do it..so knock yourself out.

Just remember you wanted to know "what am I doing wrong?" I have told you, you don't want to listen.

If this ever gets through to you the real question about losing weight is not how do I lose weight (we all actually know how thats done, eat less move more) The real question is why do you not want to lose weight.

I would not have posted this on a support thread as people just want support for their various schemes. But you did ask...

Right and now I will leave you alone.

pinkbasket · 21/09/2010 07:13

I have no idea how many calories I am eating as I am not counting them. I stopped that on day one. I know why I eat when I am not hungry and for once I am managing not to comfort eat. What I am saying to you is before I was ill I could eat what I wanted and when so I think if I lose this extra weight I will be able to introduce things I have stopped now and also coupled with dealing with the emotional eating and exercising I hope to maintain it. I am about to have scrambled eggs for breakfast and will eat chicken, salad and fish today. If this makes me ill or doesn't work at all then I will stop and clearly I am not a skinny wee thing or I wouldn't be trying to lose weight.

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SadMarg · 21/09/2010 08:29

This is not a 'no carb' diet, it's a 'low carb' diet, FirstTimer. And like it or not, the first thing to go in a low calorie diet for most people is all the fat, because it's too high in calories, which of course leads to sooo many problems.

Saying that it is a simple problem of reducing calorie intake doesn't address people's cravings. I spent a long time on a 'gradual' weight loss program and my food cravings didn't diminish at all, any way through it. How many months/years is someone supposed to fight food cravings? That is not a sustainable way to manage your weight.

Atkins works, many, many people will attest to that. Studies also show that Atkins works, and as a result some GPs are recommending it.

The fast weight loss element is only phase 1, after you have lost a certain amount of weight, you go onto phase 2, ongoing weight loss, which increases your carbs, and slows down your weight loss. Then when you are close to goal weight you again increase your carbs slowly, in increments, to see how many carbs your body needs.

Not all calories are equal in the way they cause a body to lose/retain/gain weight!!!!

Firsttimer7259 · 21/09/2010 09:24

SadMarg - pinkbasket says on Monday 20 at 21.25 "I am doing no carbs"

This is after I asked her to clarify wheather it was just bread and sugar she's cutting out or pasta, rice potatoes fruit as well. The early posts also indicate a no carb, not low carb, diet with Custardo going on about not eating any pasta, or the grapes...So it is no-carb nit low carb we are talking about here. As I said earlier getting the balance between food groups right is one thing (low carb fits under that heading) but cutting out an entire food group (ie: no carbs) is another.

chitchat09 · 21/09/2010 10:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pinkbasket · 21/09/2010 11:02

Only going on what I have been told. I am aware veg has carbs in. If nothing else I am in a better place mentally with my eating and have lost weight so I will see how I go.

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pinkbasket · 23/09/2010 08:17

Bump for custardo.

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pinkbasket · 23/09/2010 08:17

chitchat09 - you okay?

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sarah293 · 23/09/2010 08:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Chandon · 23/09/2010 10:03

good luck pinkbasket.

I agree with firsttimer, she or he is right, but maybe coudl ahve told you a bit more diplomatically.

I think no carb diets are the work of teh devil, ask any sports trainer, not only does your body need carbs, your brain needs carbs to function properly.

Going into ketosis, or starvation will make you lose weight. Sure. But you will not be able to keep it up, not because you have no willpower, but because starvation is actually not healthy and sustainable.

Diets don`t work, long term. That is why there are so many different diets and diet threads on here.

The only solution is to eat slightly smaller portions, and do a bit more exercise.

It is amazing how many calories you need. I was gobsmacked when I found out that due to my height, 6ft, and high activity level I need 2500 cals a day to maintain my weight, and would lose weight at 2000 cals already. When I tried to lose weight after pregnancy on a 1200 cal diet, I ended up fainting all over the place. Cannot believe I was so stupid...

For me it works to just eat a normal breakfast, normal lunch and dinner, and no biscuits or puddings, but defo an ocassional treat. And up the exercise a bit. Slow but steady, and sustainable. No amazing weightloss, but a healthier and slimmer body.