Lost all this weight and feel I look bigger than ever. Photo included

[MissAdvantage]

I know I probably need to get outside of my head and I also know that precisely nobody is giving me a second glance but my husband took this photo of me earlier on holiday and I recoiled a bit.

I’ve lost over 5 and a half stone and I’ve maintained at this weight ever since. I’m 9 and a half stone

maybe it’s because it’s the first time I’ve seen a photo of myself in a swimming costume but I was really quite shocked at how flabby I look. I can’t expect miracles as I’m in my 50s but ugh - I think I expected 9 and a half stone to somehow look slim? I look fine fully clothed. I’m a size 10. I just wanted to look better!

anyone else struggling a bit with a newer body and still seeing a lot of faults or just me?

I could have written this post. I’ve lost nearly 8 stone and I have quite a bit of loose skin especially on my legs and arms so still feel very self conscious. I’m a size 8/10 but probably will never feel truly comfortable in a t shirt. I suppose I only have myself to blame though.

What's your weights routine? I did about 6 months last year starting around April and then got covid and took a while to recover, before getting that megacold that everyone had around Christmas. I really need to get back to the gym but didn't see any difference during the 6 months I did. I guess I need to lift heavier? (ps congratulations on your Michelle Obama arms, that's the dream!)

@Doyouthinktheyknow I think we'll have to crack out the fake tan, and hope for rain,😂 never thought I'd be thinking I'd need to put weight on, I was thin when I was younger, never thought of saggy skin when I started mj, but I honestly didn't think it would work,i wasn't really that fat to start with, but like a lot of middle aged women I was a bit dumpy, so I thought well I'll try it never thinking the weight would drop off so quickly and easily,because it had never budged before.

You look gorgeous, the flaws are in your head! 😊

that’s absolutely what you should be doing. You’ve worked hard, you look great and bloody good for you.

If you put into Chat GPT what you want to achieve, your age, fitness level etc then it'll give you some good ideas of where to start. I found a few sessions with a PT helpful also.

You need to lift to fail, if you are completing 2 or 3 sets of an exercise you need to up the weights, its fine to not complete the reps as long as you are going to your maximum. It really helps to tone quickly.

You look bloody great!!!!

Off topic - was your photo taken at the Orchard Hotel in Singapore?

on topic - you look good. You would look amazing if you did some weights, plus it feels great to be strong. The older you get, it becomes ever more important for your health. If you do that, you’ll also need to stretch so that you get long lean muscles rather than short bulky ones. And well done on your weight loss!

Stretching and flexibility is really important, but muscle growth (hypertrophy) and shape doesn't really work like that. Muscle length is genetically determined.

But strength training does give you a longer leaner look as a woman, it’s very difficult to bulk up.

You look amazing well done!

You're not standing up straight in the photo. You look a nice size, you just need to build muscle to look toned. Possibly purchase a nicer costume

@dizzydizzydizzy you’re not a million miles away in that this place is often compared to Singapore in terms of cleanliness!

im in Abu Dhabi right now

Thanks so much everyone. Loads of interesting and helpful comments and I’m definitely going to actually commit to doing some weights as soon as I’m back home.

I genuinely think this may be the issue. I’ve focussed on weight loss and then maintaining for so long that I’ve completely forgotten what is actually going to make the biggest difference

OP - you do look great. I have the same thing now where I feel like I still look fat although I have lost a lot and I know that I look different because people tell me

I do also need to do some strength training as well. Will need advice on that but have gym friends to give me some pointers and will probably have to pay for help!

You do look slim. But yeah I get it.

Find a good trainer. Honestly, it'll be a great investment. You'll learn how to lift safely with good form and get the most out of training. Good luck!

You look lovely. Congratulations on your weight loss. Be proud of your efforts and of your brilliant body which does so much for you!

Lifting heavy weights two or three times a week will help build some muscle definition which is what people mean when they say ‘toned’, ie, low fat and good muscle mass so you see definition. Building muscle also supports our bones and joints as we age, so well worth doing. I do think you look great though.

That’s not how muscle gaining works. It’s genetically dependent, stretching won’t affect the muscle size. I have worked really really hard to bulk up, and it’s not easy as a 51 year old woman. I do have good muscle definition but I’m not bulky.

@Dingdongavon - I started by using the weight machines to ensure I didn’t do myself harm through bad form and have now progressed to the Smith machine and free weights. I aim to ‘lift to fail’ ie 2 to 3 sets with fewer repetitions (about 8) but lifting a weight that is heavy enough that I will really struggle to manage the last repetition. It used to be that women were advised to do a large number of repetitions of light weights to ‘tone’. I did this years ago and, even though I was much younger, multiple repetitions of light weights made no difference at all to my body shape.

There is another poster here @MeridaBrave who is much more experienced at weight lifting than me and has posted lots of useful advice on the maintenance board for people who are new to lifting heavy.

I’m the same age bracket as you.

when we lose weight after menopause or a significant amount at any age, the skin has need stretched beyond return.

so even with weight loss there is extra skin tissue. And skin tissue is thicker than you think. That’s why you can grab fleshy handfuls even though you are a low weight now.

secondly you need to build up muscle. Your legs have very low muscle mass. If you work hard with heavier weights your body will completely transform. The weight could stay the same but you’ll get a waist and smoother legs and not develop that meatball on toothpicks many women grow into when they age and don’t retain their muscle mass.

in our 50s we can’t just lose fat and think we will look the shape we used to unless we do this as part of the change is lost muscle mass. Not just fat. You need to replace muscle

i’m posting a pic of me from this summer. I started really upping my workouts using really heavy weights about 5 years ago. I’m now nearly 59. Still working hard to improve but the difference it has made is huge. Cellulite almost all gone. I’ve got a 26” waist eyebrow from around 31”. Fit a size uk 6-8 from a small uk 14

You look great. Your husband thinks you look so good he took a sneaky swimsuit picture. The sun must feel wonderful on your skin, which also looks fab. You zoom in on your least favourite bits; we all do. But the whole package looks slim and fit. Enjoy your holiday!

You look fantastic! Even in my 20s if I didn’t workout I was “skinny fat” there is so much to be said for building muscle, why else do all the celebs do it. Men look so much better for it too.

I think you look great but I’m sure you zoom in on any areas you don’t like when you look at it, whereas everyone else looks at the picture as a whole. If you feel like you want to make changes then exercise would make a difference very quickly. Body weight exercises like the 30-Day Shred would work, or a kettlebell workout if you want to work out at home.