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Original poster

Hen do planning help

80 replies

Laura236 · 19/08/2025 13:15

Hi all,

I am MOH for my friend who is getting married October 2027.
Hen do is going to be around May 27.

When would you start booking?
Bride is wanting to book ASAP but I would like to hold off to prevent drop outs and extra costs on remaining.
The hen do is looking like it will already be very expensive.

My thoughts were:
Villa first as can be cancelled for a smaller one if needs be?
Flights 6m before?
Activities/events 3m before?
Personalised gift bags etc after all above has been booked and paid for.

TIA!

OP posts:
UpMyself · 21/08/2025 14:59

Not until the Gender Reveal, the Baby Shower and the Christening are out of the way.

HereWeComeAtLast · 21/08/2025 15:27

I would back out now, she sounds selfish spending other people’s money and making you feel guilty when you point out that you might not be able to afford it.
Someone banging on about a hen party 2 years out is going to be an insufferable pain in the arse full stop.
She has all these pre set things then she should sort it herself.
I personally would not spend the kind of money that you’ve quoted for anyone’s hen night, not a chance.

CantThinkOfAnotherUsernane · 22/08/2025 10:06

I wouldn’t do this. I had my hen do recently it was in the uk and cost around £90 per person.
Theres no way in the world I’d have expected my best friend and MOH to organise a hen do abroad and fund it.
I think you need to speak to the bride and just say you can’t commit financially or otherwise to a hen do abroad and offer to drop out as MOH.
To be honest she doesn’t sound like a very good friend

OneNeatBlueOrca · 22/08/2025 10:20

CantThinkOfAnotherUsernane · 22/08/2025 10:06

I wouldn’t do this. I had my hen do recently it was in the uk and cost around £90 per person.
Theres no way in the world I’d have expected my best friend and MOH to organise a hen do abroad and fund it.
I think you need to speak to the bride and just say you can’t commit financially or otherwise to a hen do abroad and offer to drop out as MOH.
To be honest she doesn’t sound like a very good friend

£90 is still loads.

I recently had an epiphany as I was finding myself agreeing to go on a 2 day break with friends to something I wasnt that keen on. Just because they asked, theyre my friends blah blah

I frequently dont spend £90 on things I really want to do for myself because of costs and theb im expected to stump up this kind of money because someone is getting married and wants a pre party.

It's a lot to ask.

CantThinkOfAnotherUsernane · 22/08/2025 21:49

OneNeatBlueOrca · 22/08/2025 10:20

£90 is still loads.

I recently had an epiphany as I was finding myself agreeing to go on a 2 day break with friends to something I wasnt that keen on. Just because they asked, theyre my friends blah blah

I frequently dont spend £90 on things I really want to do for myself because of costs and theb im expected to stump up this kind of money because someone is getting married and wants a pre party.

It's a lot to ask.

Show quote history

Yeah I understand that but in my friendship group it was affordable for everyone which was checked beforehand.
A hen do abroad was definitely not affordable for everyone me included, there was only me and my 3 closest friends on mine though

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