Baby making a mess with food in cafes - is it ok?

[Squirrel81]

DC is 11 months old and majority of time when I am weaning he wants to feed himself via BLW.

When DH and I go out at weekends we have 3 hour window including travel time as DC does not sleep out or in the car - only at home.

As such, giving him lunch before we leave doesn’t give us enough time so we tend to go and get a coffee and feed him there.

Problem is, due to BLW he makes a lot of mess on the floor. I tend to give him something like pasta and some pieces of fruit/tomato along side it (but obviously varies).

First few times I would get on my hands and knees and clean up the floor after he ate but cafe floors are pretty dismal and a couple of times I’ve been told by the waiter don’t worry they will clean it up but only in very select cafes.

Question is, is it socially acceptable to leave cafe having made a mess feeding baby? I don’t want to be rude or inconsiderate. Thoughts & tips?

Of course you should clean up the stuff on the floor.

But you can also work with your baby to aim for less food ending up on floor. BLW is messy but doesn’t have to mean a significant amount of food ends up on the floor.

Give your baby smaller portions at a time so they can concentrate on getting it in their mouth and there’s less ‘flailing’ arms around. And then you can also pick up as you go along if stuff ends up on the floor.

It’s less relaxing for you but nicer for fellow cafe customers.

Just ask the staff for a dustpan and broom!That’s what we did if we couldn’t pick it up ourselves and bin it but husband was in hospitality so we didn’t want to be those people who left it in a tip

I think it’s perfectly acceptable to bring your baby or small child’s food to a cafe. Children of all ages can be picky about what they will eat.

How hard can cafe food be? Plain jacket potato? Toast? Usually there's cake of some form and usually something like a scone that's not too sweet; usually sandwiches?

It's very different if you have a child with allergies. But I'm really conscious at the moment that hospitality businesses are having a really hard time. I won't worry about it if I'd had a meal there myself, but the OP is going for a coffee, which feels a bit unfair.

In my family, we STILL talk about the mess left behind by a friend's child in restaurants/cafes 25 years ago. She was oblivious to how rude it was and it got to the point we stopped eating out with her and her children because of it.

Peak entitlement.

Pick up the lumps and put them in a nappy bag. And wipe up wet stuff with baby wipes. Your child. Your mess.

Very impressed by the idea of bringing your own dustpan and brush! Good thought.

I think fine to bring food for him at this age but you do need to discreetly clean it up
The staff probably feel obliged to say they'll do it but they shouldn't have to

Do you even have to ask? 🤮

What if someone slipped on it as they took their seat...possible I think with bits of pasta etc... we always cleaned up after ourselves...its just common decency

Omg! Cafes are in the business of selling food to make money - you don’t bring your own!

Totally agree, it's really unreasonable to say there is nothing the cafe sells that's acceptable. I just want 2 coffees please but I would also like 2 chairs, a table, a highchair & to delight my neighbours with my small child's eating habits. And please pass me the dustpan and brush when I am done.

(& dc might be less picky if they weren't pandered to so much by their fussy parents).

I have to on occasion bring food into cafe/pub/restaurant for my autistic child. I’ve never had a bad experience or been made to feel unwelcome, in fact establishments will often offer to make meals for her which aren’t on the menu (I would never expect this). Generally the same allowances are made for babies, if the adults are purchasing food and drinks it makes no difference if there is a baby in a high chair perched at the table, they would be using the same amount of space without the baby.

I put a couple of muslins on the floor under the highchair to catch the bits, and then you shake them onto a plate and then take the muslins home to wash
i think it’s better to bring your own food to the places as it reduces food waste, and means that you can have coffee and cake out a few times a month rather than bankrupting yourself for uneaten baked potatoes
also, the messy stage doesn’t last for ever. Sooner or later they crack that food goes in the mouth. Just don’t let it be a game that things be thrown around

The baby chair defo takes more space!! It’s awkward and usually in the aisle

yes they offer to cook your child food you will then buy!

and yes there will always be exceptions

I think it’s really cheeky to take up that space and feed a child messily while you only have coffees - a child of nearly a year that you have plenty of purchase options

and then not clear up!!!

think your blinkered - lots of cafe owners lament big groups of baby and parents cos they don’t buy food and bring their own! Make a mess and take up
huge amount of space with 5+ prams

they often accommodate to avoid the online local reviews that threaten their reputation

But the OP isn’t purchasing food most of the time. They’re taking up a table and spending £6 or whatever on some coffees and leaving a disaster behind. That’s super selfish.

Where are you that gives two coffees for £6???

Fine to bring baby food, definitely not ok for that food to be pasta and sauce that your baby smooshes everywhere. Seriously that is probably the messiest food you could possibly bring!

We did a lot of yoghurts (which I fed to him), sandwiches, bananas, cheese cubes, etc - small things he can pick up but which aren’t unduly messy. The messy stuff is fine for home, not for cafes.

A basic coffee is 2.95 at my local (Yorkshire). I don't think that's the issue though- paying for two drinks and taking up a table for three for a child to eat a meal you've not paid for is a bit rude.

Dismal or not I get down on the floor and clean up every scrap after DS, plus wipe down the highchair with anti-bac wipes. Added to that we’d only give him ‘lunch’ if we’d bought food ourselves. A snack maybe if we were only having a coffee, but if it was the type of place that sold a piece of fruit or a round of toast we’d buy it there.

As far as I can see from original post it’s just OP and her DH with the baby not a big group. And high chairs shouldn’t be in the walkway as it’s not safe, so unless this cafe is not being compliant with health and safety it’s very unlikely this is the case.

The reality is that lots of parents do put the high chairs in the walkways and it goes back to being scared of getting negative reviews, as well as staff who probably haven’t seen the risk assessments to know about health and safety.

As a waitress I much prefer someone asking for dustpan & brush....
If they say "so sorry but DC has made a mess could I have the brush to clean it please?" Then we do not mind as your willing to do it and I'll say I will happily do it but if you didn't offer and just left I'd have a good ol grumble 🤣
And yes, always leave a tip as a thank you

We are getting on to more general issues and I was giving examples

It would be much scarier to have a bad review for burning a baby with a hot drink. If the staff aren’t being trained properly that’s on the establishment.

But their not buying anything for baby to go near them!! 😂😂