Baby making a mess with food in cafes - is it ok?

[Squirrel81]

DC is 11 months old and majority of time when I am weaning he wants to feed himself via BLW.

When DH and I go out at weekends we have 3 hour window including travel time as DC does not sleep out or in the car - only at home.

As such, giving him lunch before we leave doesn’t give us enough time so we tend to go and get a coffee and feed him there.

Problem is, due to BLW he makes a lot of mess on the floor. I tend to give him something like pasta and some pieces of fruit/tomato along side it (but obviously varies).

First few times I would get on my hands and knees and clean up the floor after he ate but cafe floors are pretty dismal and a couple of times I’ve been told by the waiter don’t worry they will clean it up but only in very select cafes.

Question is, is it socially acceptable to leave cafe having made a mess feeding baby? I don’t want to be rude or inconsiderate. Thoughts & tips?

Not nice for other people to watch either…

Yeah, I would not feed my baby a cheese sandwich or chips but you do you.

You wouldn't give an 11mo a cheese sandwich ? Why ever not ? Chips I agree are not ideal but we don't cook them at home. But am interested in what is wrong with a sandwich ?

Too busy shovelling sugar into her tea I think...

You might not be able to leave it spotless but as long as you make a bit of an effort it’s fine, it can be difficult with babies and most people will be understanding

I own a cafe, if you are apologetic and are making an effort to clean up then my staff would come over and tell you not to worry.

If you get up and leave without even acknowledging it I would be furious, and if you came in again I'd tell you it was unacceptable (I have done this)

I own a cafe, if you are apologetic and are making an effort to clean up then my staff would come over and tell you not to worry.

If you get up and leave without even acknowledging it I would be furious, and if you came in again I'd tell you it was unacceptable (I have done this)

ETA I did BLW with both of mine and cleaned up after them, there's no excuse

I always cleared up after my son & definitely got on the floor with a few wet wipes & gave the high chair a clean up. I know they staff still need to come & spray everything but I would never leave such a mess & I judge others who do.

Absolutely not acceptable to leave food all strewn over the floor.
we get on our hands and knees and clear up everything that’s been split.

how is this even a question?!??

Certainly clean up what you can, but don't worry too much, the cafe will have the right things to give the floor a quick sweep. Begin to be transitioning towards feeding food you have bought in the cafe to your child. It's fine to bring your own baby food in pouches if they don't sell those, or to give one or two nibbly bits you've brought to a little one who's mostly on milk, but an 11 month old will have been on solids for 4-5 months by now. They should be eating a wide variety of foods and so it should be easy to get them something at a cafe. I also wouldn't be worrying about the odd meal out. Yes the food may be higher in sugar and salt than what he'd have at home, but if he's just having a little thing, it won't matter much.

No. It's not acceptable. And you know it.

Stay at home and clean up your own mess.

This is exactly what we did. FWIW I think OPs approach is incredibly cheeky.

I bet you’re one of those who parents who think it’s acceptable to change their baby’s nappy on the table in a cafe as ‘it’s only a wee’ and then leave the dirty nappy on a plate for the waiting staff to remove

We used to take a messy mat with us for this, pop it under the high chair and then just clear it away and take all mess with us when we left.

I always clean up after my DGS has eaten in a restaurant or cafe. Baby wipes to clean the highchair and pick up his bits off the floor - it's not 'normal cleaning' is it - I think it's disrespectful to leave it. Of course it's not pleasant but you can always wash your hands afterwards.

I worked in a cafe and it drove me extra mad when people would feed their babies/DCs and leave wrappers and mess on the floor of stuff that we didn't sell in the cafe. I even had a used nappy under the table once 🙄

What's wrong with a cheese sandwich? MN is mad.

No parents should clean up after their babies if they make a mess. Weaning is a messy process and that's completely normal but don't leave it for someone else to clean, that is just rude to do.

Exactly this. I have 3DC, the youngest is a similar age to your baby OP.

I would only take them different food if it was something that wasn't messy and a small amount e.g. some cucumber sticks, rice cakes, pureed baby food to be spoon fed, and this would mostly be when I know that there isn't going to be anything particularly suitable to feed them, e.g. going to Macdonald's for my older two or something. Otherwise and/or we'd give bits off our plates, a little at a time to minimise large scale throwing. I generally try to avoid giving my babies/very young toddlers excessively messy food when eating out and I spoon feed more when out to limit mess.

After eating I scrub the high chair with baby wipes, same for the end of the table if it's a chair without a tray. Then I'd pick up any pieces of food on the floor. If it's particularly bad I ask staff for a dustpan and brush and brush it all up myself. Occasionally I have had staff say they'll do it but it's obvious they feel they must say that, no way would I expect them to do it, it would be very unfair.

Basically I'd leave a small amount of crumbs for example akin to any small mess that anyone else could make but not more than that.

This thread has surprised me a bit though because everyone's saying to clean up which I agree but literally every time we go anywhere the high chairs are always visibly absolutely minging so it doesn't seem like other people do generally do so! People are also saying don't take your own food, locally I see this all the time and often with toddlers who are like 2+ so well beyond weaning stage! Must be the area I live in perhaps...

We had a very small slim dustpan and brush in the changing bag (we put it inside a freezer bag, beyond the first 2-4 weeks we always bought food, rather than taking our own.

I always assumed that coffee shops offered toast because it’s a good snack for weaning kids 🤔

I wouldn’t have taken or ordered something like pasta at 11 months and would go for easy to clean food that’s more likely to be crumbs or chunks (eg toast) and leave a big tip for the person cleaning up.

why are you practicing BLW when you are out if they are that messy at the moment anyway? having been a waitress myself and having to clean up after food was everywhere on the floor, I just couldnt ever imagine leaving it 😩

Why does it have to be blw all the time?

When my son was that age, at home we would be as messy as we liked.. but out in a restaurant or cafe, or around other family/friends' houses, we would just feed him "traditionally". No mess, got fed.. didn't end up fussy at all.

Can’t believe you even have to ask! Of course you clear up after your kids. Suspect ‘don’t worry’ is the default response but shouldn’t be taken as ‘don’t worry, I’d be delighted to clean up the food you’ve brought from home and dropped all over my floor’. I hope you tip well.

I always had a big handful of wipes and cleaned as DC ate, including grabbing bits and wiping the floor. loads of cafes sell baby friendly stuff, my DC loved French bread when teething for example, I supplemented with stuff I brought and always gave snacks in car.

My DC never slept when out of and about once they outgrew the pram.

You are being massively unreasonable and ridiculous centring everything around your child’s nap time too.

please clean up after yourself.