Children chalking over our land

[Charliec12]

Hi all, am I over reacting? My neighbours brought their children some chalks at the weekend. The children are chalking everywhere with them including on my driveway which we half share with them. My OH said to one of the children tonight that the area looked a mess. Said child started crying and then the Mum came out and was confrontational and annoyed with me that I don’t agree with it looking nice in the area. I also have 2 young children and I get they want to have fun.

I didn’t even mention the joint ownership. Why don’t you actually read what I’ve written instead of going off on a tangent and bringing up things I haven’t said. I said they should stay on their property boundary because the OP said that in the deeds the land they were drawing on belonged to her and her husband and therefore for the sake of being respectful their parents shouldn’t let them draw on it.

Fact of the matter is that unless you have the deeds in front of you, you can’t reasonably claim any different regardless of what you blindly believe. Property law is complex and has many different variations and isn’t a one case fits all matter.

I didn’t mention a boundary dispute either, I said access dispute which is also a legal process which you brought into the conversation. I didn’t even mention either of those things, you quoted me and said it’s unwise. Stop talking nonsense. Nothing I have said is incorrect in the slightest so please stop quoting me and move on. Thanks. I won’t be responding to any further comments from yourself as you are very clearly intent on derailing the thread over semantics and I won’t play a part in it.

Do you remember when you were a kid and there was a miserable old couple on your street? If your ball went into their garden everyone would groan and argue over who was going to have to go and get an earful for asking for it back. They were always complaining about you and your friends playing outside too loudly or other harmless behaviour. All the kids and other neighbours avoided them and they had a lonely and sad life.

Pull yourself together OP or that's your future.

Personally, I don’t think you are being unreasonable if you expect people to respect your private property. It does children no favours to think that they can do what they want where they want without being held to account.
PS their mum was very rude and unnecessary

If the little kids chalked

                        ''Have, have, it's <span class="italic">have!'' </span>

I would understand the annoyance.

I played hopscotch for hours and I can still 'see' my late mother and aunt chalking the drive to show my girls how to play, much to their amazement! However we never chalked anyone else's drive, as rain isn't happening at the moment a good bucket of water or a hose pipe should sort it and hopefully discourage them.

Oh dear,

First of all it’s entirely possible to work in social housing and look down on people who rent their homes. I imagine lots of people who live in social housing might have experiences of this.
Second, it’s a shared drive it’s pretty petty to kick off about kids drawing in chalk in a shared space.
Third, it’s going to wash off so even if you don’t like it, it’s not the end of the world.
Fourth, your husband shouldn’t have raised his voice unless the kids were in danger. He’s not their teacher or their parent.
Fifth, you don’t get to tell people off for their language on here, they’re adults and if people want to say fuck or bugger it’s their choice.

Yes you over reacted, both about the chalk but also in taking on your role as the arbiter of what is right and wrong in terms of the language people use to express themselves.

...but it's not private property? It's a shared driveway. Both households have equal claim to the LAND.

Your little ones might like to join in maybe?

This would've been a lovely approach to take. All the children could have been playing together, chalking and having fun. What a shame it didn't go this way.

Most mums would react the same way if their children started crying. He should have spoken to their mother. Adults think they can bully small children into submission it's horrible. I don't understand why they couldn't talk to their mother if they were that bothered. The two of them are cowards.

Yes you and your other half are over reacting. Kids being kids drawing with chalk on a SHARED driveway is not a big deal. As everyone else has said it will wash away when it rains. Telling the child it looks a mess is just downright mean! They probably worked really hard on their chalk art. Whatever happened to being kind and if you have nothing nice to say then say nothing at all?

Why a grown adult feels the need to say something like that to a child is beyond me. How did your OH expect their parent to react when they unnecessarily upset the child?

You sound like the type of people to start washing it off whilst the children are still playing. Do you not remember being a child yourself and how enjoyable drawing with chalk could be?

Lighten up and let kids be kids.

how sad that a child got some colourful chalk and got a bit over enthusiastic with their drawings and your partner called it a mess.

OP it's just not that deep - it's some chalk, they're kids and it's summer. I've been sitting here trying to put myself in a position where I could imagine even saying anything to kids who were clearly having fun in a very temporary, entirely damage-free way outside my house and I just can't see why your husband said anything at all, never mind even slightly raised his voice - if they'd been drawing something rude, fine, but otherwise...

My partner also works in social housing I know how you think. As if working in social housing is a brownie point snob.

At least he knows he was in the wrong and was willing to put it right. You're bored aren't you the kids have driven you to insanity.

Exactly what I was about to come and say. Op's a gatekeeper to the poor grubby people and she KNOWS her rights over LAND.

You miserable, curmudgeonly sods your DH actually made a child cry by telling her her artwork looked a mess.

It's a shared driveway. It's children's pavement chalk that washes off in the next shower. Get a grip.

Kids can't bloody win these days.. poor kids get shouted at for playing video games inside and then when they're out they still get shouted at. It's not permanent! It's chalk ffs

I think it is nice that they are playing out and using their imaginations, chalk washes away and children have always done this. I used to play hopscotch on the pavement and the playground.

If that is all you have got to be aggravated about on your street then consider yourself lucky. Round my way we contend with almost daily fly tipping, litter everywhere, bins left out for years on end, drug dealing and street drinkers! A bit of chalking would be a positive improvement

There is a happy medium. They can play out just not scrawl on other people's driveways. Even if it is shared there will obviously be a their side and an our side. Just chalk on your own side it shouldn't need to be said.
Parent your kids and stop them annoying your neighbours. I wouldn't be impressed if I came home to see kids had made a mess on our side if we had a shared drive.

My thoughts exactly, when you have real problem neighbours it has a constant negative impact on your life.

I have just read your post to my 10 year old who said that you are a massive fun sucker as the chalk will wash off in the rain.
I agree, and your partner should be ashamed of himself for making a child cry with his actions. I don't blame the mother for being gobby as she was protecting her children from the massive twat who made her child cry.
As for playparks- everyone uses chalk in a park, it is for children to play, not for you to judge the aesthetics.
You and your husband sound horribly judgemental and I pity your children as they probably are not allowed to have fun.

If they had chalked over a drive that was for sole use of your household and not shared in any way I would have some sympathy (not a lot but I can understand your point) but the fact it is shared access means that you are being a bit ridiculous.

My neighbours are branching out from scrap dealing to crack dealing, now that it a bit of a worry!

Yes because we take great pride in our area and would not do that to others without asking them. You sound awful yourself to even make a comment that I am awful for taking pride in my area.

Of course yes I am that person 🙄🙄🙄