My Dad married a woman twenty years younger, he will likely die before her. Does that mean I am unlikely to inherit?

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I think it does doesn’t it?

Also another way to look at it.

How much of the money they (your dad and his wife) have was his and how much hers?

Did he bring all of the money to their relationship? Or did she? Or was it 50/50?

Because being honest, you should not be inheriting from her. She's not your mother. So unless he brought all of the money in, you should only get a %.

Ugh, another money grabber! Did your father marry and divorce your mother? Did or will your mother leave you anything when she dies?
Chances are you won’t inherit anything from your father If he lives to old age and needs care and his savings are over the threshold then he will have to pay for his care.
The bank of mum and dad has to stop sometime.
Do you have siblings? Do they all think the same way as you? All out for their share of the pennies?
Kerching! 💰

Exactly what I was about to say. Looks a bit as if he wanted a nurse rather than a partner.

I've experience of two scenarios in our family, with very different outcomes! My mum was 20 years younger than my dad - she bought up my two half brothers, as my dad was left a widower and then they had me. Sadly my mum died before him with very aggressive cancer and I was instrumental in my dad making a new will - he left equal shares of his estate to me and my two half brothers. So a very fair outcome for all of us.

My father-in-law - a high earning professional - was left a widower when my husband's mum sadly died in early middle age. He married within a year to a member of his staff who then proceeded to have a child very quickly. He (deliberately in our opinion) died without making a will and everything went to his second wife (I will not call her step-mother). It's fine - my husband is at peace with it - we have no contact with said woman or their half-sister, which is actually sad about the half-sister. She is the type of woman who lives her life on the surface. 'She knows 'The price of everything and the value of nothing' (Oscar Wilde)

I have a good relationship with my remaining half-brother and feel it is a testament of what good, kind and helpful parents we had.

Most of the inheritance from my parents was passed onto our only child, which I know they would have wanted. We have a comfortable, not flashy life built by ourselves through always working and contributing to workplace pensions. Our joy is spending time with our grandchildren - you can't put a price on that.

I hope your dad does the right thing for you and everyone in his life that he loves and values.

I am the younger wife in this situation (not quite 20 years mind) and yes in his will if he dies first most comes to me and if I die first the same, but we already have the split for the children stipulated in our wills (we have a joint DS as well as DSKids) and my husband trusts me to carry this out and not change the will post his passing (which I never would as I love those kids). His life insurance also partly goes to the children and some savings go to them directly in his will and in reality I would try to free some cash if possible to give them something immediately. But yes, otherwise they will have to wait a bit longer.
They have never brought it up (they may wonder in fairness) but I would never see them lose out. So I guess some of it will depend on your relationship with your DSM. Though if the kids fell out with me or lost touch after their fathers passing, nothing would change for me with regards to the will.

I think that caring parents should be aware of all possible scenarios which could occur when one of them dies and try to make appropriate arrangements. We are long term married ...51 years but we still don't have mirror wills.y half of the house is willed to the children when I die with DH having the right to live in it all of his life and their dad's will is the same.
We both say we would never remarry ...but you never know ...as someone up thread said ... there's no fool like an old fool 😀
We both worked hard for the house and we and the children did without a lot when they were young to pay the mortgage so it is our pleasure to think of what they might do with the money earned by the house.
If one of us did remarry they can leave their half to their new spouse if they wish but hopefully half is saved for the children

Ignore all those people on their high horse saying what's it got to do with you etc

It's totally normal to ask the question and most parents would want to leave it to their children

I'm 12 years younger than dh. He chatted with his adult dd about his will. He was going to leave it all to her. She suggested halving it. I kept out of it as was their business. Hopefully his wife will be fair with you? Although who knows what will happen to his money?
It's best not to let it marr your relationship.

Even if the will says otherwise, the wife can challenge and is likely to be successful - certainly that’s what we were advised, and had to come to an agreement rather than drag through courts and waste the estate.

Is your dad and his wife the type to be very organised and to have arranged wills / know all of the implications of inheritance?

If they're not, I think it's reasonable to ask if he's made a will and made it clear what he wants to happen when he passes away, especially as they haven't had further children and she has none.

I say this because a similar situation with people we knew turned into a massive mess because of lack of wills. Husband died, new wife inherited everything and continued living in their (his really!) house. She then died suddenly a few years later and because there was no clear will / plan everything went to her niece who she didn't even have a close relationship with. That just happened to be her closest relative as she had no children herself. The man's children challenged this as much as they could and claimed the dad had expected the family home and everything else to go to them once both he and his wife had passed. It seemed like none of them had the first idea about inheritance or what to expect.

I don’t understand why posters are saying it’s none of your business or you’re being grabby etc.

Of course it’s your business and of course it’s not grabby.

MN is weird sometimes.
If you were his ex wife posters would be telling you to take whatever you can - half the house, maintenance, pension etc and that wouldn’t be seen as grabby but an adult child wondering if the inheritance that was promised to her will now go to his new wife is seen as grabby.

I personally would be tempted to just ask him but that doesn’t mean he won’t change his mind in a couple of years and so it may be better to expect nothing and them if you did get something it will be an extra bonus.

Anything I have will go directly to my DCs.
I wouldn’t leave anything to a new DH but then I wouldn’t get married for that reason.
It’s different when you have DCs with someone but I think you should prioritise your DC over a new partner who is an adult and can provide for themselves.

Hopefully these decisions will be made in conjunction with all relevant parties. My dad’s wife is aware of what is in my dad’s will, and in agreement with it. She may have a personality transplant when he dies and decide to contest the will, but it’s unlikely.
In actual fact, she didn’t want to inherit anything. All of his wealth was earned before their relationship and she didn’t feel she had any right to it. She has her own house that she currently rents out, and lives in my dad’s house with no rent/mortgage/bills, so she didn’t feel entitled to any share in it. As it is, she’s likely to inherit a substantial cash sum and I will inherit the house.

That’s lovely to hear ❤️❤️

I would probably let the DCs know as they could be secretly a bit worried about it and perhaps knowing about it may relieve some stress when their dad dies.

It really is a minefield. I knew of a situation in which a couple married when they were in their 60s. The wife had adult children, the husband had no children. Husband didn’t get on with his step children.

The wife died, and her will stated that her half of the house went to her kids, but that her husband had the right to live in the house as long as he wanted. And he decided he wanted to live there as long as possible, to prevent his step children getting their inheritance. He became very frail and unwell, and unable to care for himself, but he flatly refused to go into a care home, because he knew the house would have to be sold, and stepkids would get their share, and he wanted to delay that as long as possible.

It was a really nasty toxic situation.

Yes it means you are far less likely to inherit, and if you do it will be less.

I dont know why people are getting so het up about you asking. Its pretty reasonable imo to wonder how this will effect you.

From my perspective i recently had my will updated along with my partners. I made it very clear that in the event i passed away i understood that they may enter into another relationship. However, over my dead body was that person going to be entitled to a penny of my half of our estate which i want to go to my children. It was ok as my partner had exactly the same thoughts.

We have our wills setup that in the event of one of our death 50% of the value of our estate passes to the children. I love my partner and trust their decisions, however if i am not there to protect my children then i want it covered legally.

Maybe your father has already done this.

This is what happened to my father. His dad remarried and the wife outlived him by decades - took everything (including sentimental photos etc) and my dad got absolutely nothing from his parents. His cousins and such cobbled together some photo albums for him.

Hmm, not sure i see the issue here. He didnt stop them getting their inheritance. The inheritance never changed and the wifes wishes that her husband continued to live in the house was followed to the letter.

Yes the children didnt get their inheritance so quickly but this was very very clear in the mothers will.

IMO this is not an issue.

Why do people say this? My DF worked all his life to leave something to his kids when he went, I have a copy of his will and it’s all been discussed about where the money will go, likewise when my DS died I knew I would inherit it all as we’d talked about it. Ditto our kids know what’s in our will and we know what is in theirs (obv they aren’t leaving it to us, hopefully we’ll be dead by then)
I find it bizarre that MN think that family inheritance is nothing to do with anyone except the person who is making the will.

My dad's father died when he was 14. His mum remarried sometime later. She then died unexpectedly after being mugged. Both my dad and my uncle were left without an inheritance as a result.

This is why my mum and dad both agreed to leave their share of the house to us kids rather than the spouse.
I'd urge everyone to do the same.

I may be in the minority but I really don’t care about my Dads money/property.
He left school at 14 and worked hard all his life until he retired at 66, everything he has is through his own hard graft, everything he has is his own.
Inheritance is a gift not a right, if I don’t see a penny of it because he’s spent it or left it to the person he lives with 24/7 and loves completely or gets sucked up in care fees if they were required it would not bother me in the slightest.
I have my own house and family, the house we got through no holidays and scrimping and saving like mad in our early 20’s when everyone else was out clubbing etc my children may inherit from me one day, or they may not but I’d hope they wouldn’t be sat there trying to work what/if they’ll get anything.
I expect them to achieve their dreams like everyone else has done, hard work sacrifice and determination, or they turn out like the step daughter on the other thread whose basically willing her dad to divorce or die to give her a house deposit….
My Dad didn’t leave his family, we were all grown ups when he got married after spending many years rearing us as a single parent. He’s entitled to have joy and love in his life, I am however not entitled to a bean and that’s the way I prefer it.

It depends entirely what his will says and things like how the house is owned if there is any joint property. If he doesn’t make a will and the house is a joint tenancy then yes it will all go to her by default but many people make a new will after remarrying and do leave assets such as their half of a property to their kids. If you are close maybe talk to him about it?

What a thoroughly unpleasant reply. Fortunately you are in a minority here. Most people understand why this not an unreasonable thing for the OP to be wondering about.

Didn’t your DM get her “fair share” in the divorce settlement?

Are you in Scotland? The laws about children inheriting from parents differ north if the border.