Thomas Markle very ill

[Viviennemary]

I've just read Thomas Markle is in hospital intensive care. He has been treated poorly by Meghan. I doubt if the pair will have anything to say about this. Though they've always plenty to say about a lot of things. Doubt they'll be rushing to his bedside.

Of course he can tell his truth! Maybe he will go into detail about why none of his GC are in contact with him, that would be good to have cleared up in a book.

Yes it's all very odd isn't it ?

...and the counsellor said, "Well, they couldn't have been that bad if they produced you, could they?", speaking of the parents.

Who said 'Honour thy father and thy mother'?

Dark horse, Serenster. Up to speed with Kenneth Williams. Nice to know.

Wogan would have understood every allusion.

I’m lost here … any chance of throwing some light for one trying to keep up?

Are you quite well?

Here's one @NaturalW - I think a generally well regarded and well remembered sketch ( Re Kenneth Williams )

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/eRnd48yTC5A

Same. As a Nurse of almost 36yrs it was really disheartening to hear so called colleagues say that. The comments did seem to encompass a lot of people, not the tiny minority it actually will be.

Empathy is in very short supply it appears.

My comments were based on what I (and others I know) have seen in our lives, including our careers. Other people on the thread said similar to me. It’s nothing to do with empathy but based on what we’ve seen.

And other people have emphatically disagreed with you

@NaturalW and @ThePoshUns , I am not perfectly well physically due to body not being as young et cetera, and mentally I'm off the wall.

The thread is about Thomas Markle and much has been said. I was just doing a rove around thoughts.
I think it's the second of the ten commandments which tells us to honour our fathers and our mothers. (Bible, Old Testament, Moses I don't know how long those words or that idea have been around. Obviously some parents are appalling and it would be awful to suggest that their children respect them in any way, but most parents do a 'good enough/not bad' sort of job. The counsellor was listening to someone who was having a little moan about her parents and the counsellor said, "Well, they didn't do such a bad job if you are the result." I think it was a clever reply from the counsellor; better than , "Oi, don't be nasty about your parents." Do you find that as you grow older you can see your parents' lives and their reasons for their behaviour better than you could when you were young?

Serenster rarely posts a jokey sentence and is therefore a 'dark horse' to me with the 'Infamy' reference. As you no doubt know, Serenster's posts are usually very factual and enlightening, especially about the law. The 'infamy' joke was a long time ago, so not all people will understand the allusion to it.

And others have agreed with me.

Only one other who apparently has a background of caregiving.

Two others agreed with me on here. In real life, lots of people with experience of caring for people hold the same opinion as I do.

And lots don’t

Indeed.

.

Luckily there’s no need to rely on anecdotal evidence about the causes of loneliness in older people because there’s quite a lot of research out there. ‘Being quite unpleasant’ tends not to feature iirc.

Well quite and as I have already pointed out , it was posters here who suggested he was lonely in the first place !
so it’s a moot point at most.🤷‍♀️

Are your unqualified views endorsed by your professional body - and does the BMA endorse these same views from your Dr partner and Dr adult child?

How does holding these views enhance your clinical interventions? How do you change how you give care to lonely elderly people whom you assume are usually wrong ‘uns?

Aside from the Old Testament commandment about honoring parents (the only one that comes with a blessing incidentally), many other religions and cultures emphasise honouring parents and taking care of parents.

Even the state of California has expectations around taking care of parents. California has a filial support law (California’s Family Code, sections 4400-4405) so legally, M does owe her father according to her fellow Californians.

It is a right mess that will keep on giving the tabloids plenty to write about as the word privacy is alien to the Markles who exist in a state of perpetual hunting for the next camera and microphone!

Like a lot of elderly people I've simply outlived most of my family & friends.

I may be flattering myself but I don't think I was ever such an arsehole that my loved ones preferred death to being in my company.

It's just the way it goes for some folks. How sad that someone working in health care would judge people who just by chance happen to be alone in life.

When my dad was unwell he was in hospital. An(other) old man in the bed opposite. No relatives, as he’d been an only and his only son had predeceased him, as had his wife.

I’ve no idea if he’d been a horrible person, (it didn’t appear so, when I was chatting to him), but it was clear, circumstances played a part in his lack of visitors.

I’m sorry to hear that @MrsGusset

It has been a couple of years since I engaged with this area of research but I remember bereavement being a big cause of loneliness. As are physical health problems (especially if sensory or affecting mobility), disability, loss of social circle post-retirement so fewer social opportunities, relocation for financial or other reasons, stopping driving and/or poor public transport, mental health problems, lower incomes, lack of access to technology or lack of confidence in using it, plus shame and stigma often prevents lonely people from seeking help. It’s a huge problem for older people, with all kinds of health consequences and with big and complicated societal causes. Personal likeability is really neither here nor there and it feels very victim blamey to suggest it imo.

i was in hospital just over a year ago (bad case of double pneumonia) As I was hooked up to o2, a machine which looked like something darth Vader would use and various IV’s . I asked my husband not to bring the kids and distress them. Ditto I didn’t feel like visitors to kept it quiet from family and friends (my mum is older and lives on the other side of the country with my family), and I didn’t feel upto chatting with my lovely friends, so mainly texted (wasn’t alllowed to remove breathing devices as o2 saturation would drop dangerously low.

I didn’t realise the nurses would think I was therefore an asshole abandoned by the world 🤣🤣

Well this has turns into a very different and dull thread hasn’t it?