As ever#4 - As usual

[Words]

New thread!

Would a few Netflix spin offs & say jam & a successful perfume create an income stream & Montecito money?

Grandiose and delusional - add on entitled and arrogant and you have the Narc bingo card.

Your earlier post with the point about having been exposed to narcissim means you are able to sense it early is spot on.

And the vitriol is an expression of knowing viserally the huge emotional wounds these people inflict on others. I feel for all her family, friends, collegaues and staff who have experienced her wrath - its obliterating when you are on the end of narc rage.

I don't know of any super rich person who has made vast sums from lifestyle shows and product merching. These things are a sideline for people who've already made their money from acting or modelling or another actual career.

And Meghan is well past her peak of fame. 5 years ago was her chance to really cash in.

@InishBiggle spot on. I wonder what’s seeded likely narcissism - or ‘worse’ personality disorder in M, I think made not born. Not to excuse but I wonder, feeling like the outsider at Sacred Heart might be a factor & possibly family life being a bit dysfunctional (?) Harry’s flaws easier to understand maybe if not to excuse.I hope the children have healthy contact with the outside world.

@IcedPurple how much real money do they need to ‘win’ in Montecito & outside world I wonder? How much is enough? As it’s this that will determine M’s next steps at least I think.

My opinion was pretty much cemented though after that awkward Fab Four interview.

I had doubts during the engagement interview, then there was the Fab Four interview that made me start listening to the thoughts in my head and not shy away from them. But it was the nonsense when they left/ that interview with Oprah that sickened me to my core. They’re despicable and not even the horrendous/still very fresh pictures in my mind of a young boy having to walk behind his mums coffin will ever change my view of them.

I find that slightly chilling, because how many removes from reality is that aim? It's not 'changing the world'. It's not even 'desire to change the world'. It's 'wanting to have the appearance of having the desire to change the world'. (And that's not even before we get onto the empty concept of 'changing the world' in the first place. From what to what? Why? How? Who gets to decide what the world currently is and what it should be? And how will they check in with any of the 7 billion people who might not want any particular change? etc).

Yes, I thought exactly the same at the time. And then came Meghan's Valentine's Day insta post: she was so proud of him in Canada at the IG, "changing the world". What was he doing there? Giving the games a profile. Merely by existing at the games, apparently, he's changing the world. Not the actual competitors doing the actual work; not the scores of people behind the scenes. Oh no. Just Harry. Getting his photo taken and making a speech.

It brought to mind the section in one of their whingeathons when Harry said that merely by existing within the RF they constituted a threat to people, upset the order with their sheer amazingness.

It's breathtaking. I don't think they're any closer to their come to Jesus moment. They have created and live in their own reality which is so far removed from the reality.

"And Meghan is well past her peak of fame. 5 years ago was her chance to really cash in."

This is a good point. She's not a fresh face, and fast closing in on 50. The opportunities really dry up.

Instead of using the past five years to cement her status as a bona fide royal (like Grace Kelly, Kate and others who have married in) she had to strop and now finds herself a cut-rate Wallis Simpson peddling groceries.

She could have stick it out and formed her own friendships in higher circles, among heads of state and business leaders, people in the arts, philanthropy and human rights.

Instead chose the brief pleasure of the sanctimonious revenge interview with Oprah and made herself a laughingstock, as did he with the juvenile and whining Spare.

Talk about throwing it all away with both hands.

@BettyBardMacDonald the worry might be lack of £ may put pressure on H to sell family out further in Spare 2, 3 etc. Isn’t another book due?

Talk about throwing it all away with both hands.

There is no chance, none at all, of Meghan making Montecito money or any other kind of money from her present enterprises, in fact she would be losing money hand over fist if she hadn't obviously pared back every single necessary outlay to the bare minimum: not even a decent photographer for her Instagram marketing, if that is what she intended. Just taking the businesses of anyone I've actually heard of, Victoria Beckham's label and Gwyneth Paltrow's Goop (and whatever you may think of Goop, it did have distinctive unique selling points and was capable of generating plenty of publicity, those eggs or whatever they were) those two businesses were loss leaders for years, propped up by income streams from elsewhere, before they both finally, after much persistence and even more expert support and consultation, became fully sustainable and capable of turning in a profit. Meghan couldn't even begin to ... and, as PP have pointed out, she has no investment capital that we know of and no digital or any other infrastructure to get As Ever properly off the ground, though she may be frantically searching at the moment. She might just as well take her jams to the local Saturday market, if they have such things in Montecito, and have done with it.

As for the possibility of Netflix spin-offs: surely the offers for those would have been forthcoming by now? I don't think any other media company, looking at the botch-ups already produced, the paucity of original, viable ideas and all the other publicity about bullying hanging around her like a bad smell is going to particularly want to take her on.

Putting her name to a perfume: yes, possibly, but that wasn't quite in line with her stated aims, and again is probably too late: the time for that was two to five years back.

So at present, we continue to watch the whole thing unravel.

Final, last word on that jam: https://www.telegraph.co.uk/royal-family/2025/02/26/william-and-catherine-in-wales-together-for-first-time-sinc/

Oh my gosh it's next level isn't it? This is one of the things I love about Greek culture: even though conservative Orthodoxy requires us to go vegan for Lent, we've given it some thought and concluded that fasting doesn't mean we can't also gorge ourselves on the finest cake known to humanity!

I don't understand why it's not more popular in Western Europe. The Brits used to be very conservative about their desserts but that's all changing now. There was a time a couple years back when polenta cake was the Instagram dessert du jour but still hardly anyone with a big platform was talking about portokalopita. It needs to change. Urgently!

In fact maybe that's the change in the world that Meghan so desperately wanted to effect, lol. Get everyone acquainted with portokalopita. I'd be totally behind that!

Yes, really interesting. It makes sense of a lot of their behaviour, like turning up at the scene of the fires recently. Not doing anything useful, not having anything helpful to say, just the idea that gracing it with their presence would be some "comfort", and people would think they seem worthy.

Personally, I always feel the really humanitarian and charitable people are the ones you never hear about. Not the ones on quasi-royal tours, or the celebs climbing Kilimanjaro (or some smaller hill) for "charity", then going back by private jet.

As so many have said, Meghan doesn't appear to want to do the royal grunt-work, but the shiny, glittery stuff. I can't forget her little-girl-lost act face in that market in Fiji. No-one was doing anything to her, she had security, but no, she had to leave. No similar issues in Nigeria or Colombo then?

Nothing they do seems real, or should I say "authentic"? It's all dabbling: her book, Archewell (can they really justify the salaries they're paying when that seems to do nothing?), the Parents' Network, to say nothing of the podcasts/TV stuff. It makes me wonder what their real life is. Are they just knocking about that huge house with no real friends?

The one thing I do agree with is not touting their children for publicity. I don't like the teaser shots, the arm/hands, the back of their heads etc, but I really wonder about the wisdom of the likes of the Beckhams and how much/often their children are in the public eye. The Beckhams say they're worried about security but frequently post photos of Harper in school uniform. It doesn't take much to work out what school she goes to. But more than that, those poor children seem to rarely go to school and have to make all their mistakes in the glare of the public eye. What if Harper wants to be a nuclear physicist? She doesn't seem to go to school enough to achieve that, because it seems more important to bolster Victoria's image as a fabulous mother by having her at all her shows. They don't seem to realise (or care?) that life isn't just about money and fame. It only takes you so far.

And we come full circle to Meghan...what will make her happy and fulfilled? Surely, surely, they must have enough money to live a decent life? Maybe not the A-list private jet life, but enough for a big place somewhere sunny, with chickens and dogs, where they could bring their children up in privacy. I just don't know.

An aside but on Oprah interview I never understood why Harry or both didn’t say ‘before we begin we’x like to send our love to the DofE’ just decent.

Ditto M in ‘surviving but not thriving’ gate in Africa ‘no one has asked how I am’. An acknowledgement of privilege as a caveat needed surely? ‘Of course I realise I am very fortunate & I am grateful, however…’.

This is the nub of the issue for them. In Montecito, they're closer to entry level than at the top. It would be a bit like moving to Hampstead and buying a small, run down-ish house on not-the-most-coveted street. And then, 3 years after moving in, going on to name a lifestyle brand Heath Living, or something. There is old money in Montecito. Eye watering new money. Plenty, plenty of people don't have to work and neither to do their children and grandchildren (which is where the defensive "I've never wanted to be a woman who lunches, I've always wanted to work" comes from I think). They need the money. Their running costs for just living in that neighborhood and school two children will be eye watering, let alone security bills. If they don't secure an income stream soon that house could well end up being an albatross around their necks. Harry I think is used to living frugally. It's all gone to Meghan's head (wtf did Harry know about California and its neighborhoods before she came along?!) and she was spending money like it's water initially. Lots of big costs have been visibly cut. And, apologies for how snooty this will sound, they don't know how to be rich. They don't know how to earn it, spend it, keep. Neither of them have the first clue and to me, it shows.

I'm interested in how many posters are saying they have some kind of psychiatric issue: narcissism/personality disorders. Having known some people over the years with some big issues it makes me wonder where the line is between a real psych issue and simply being not very nice. Both M&H come across as spoilt, entitled and generally brattish. Is that really a psychiatric problem, or a result of their situation and expectations? It reminds me of a mum I knew who had a daughter with Down's. She was acting up one day and her mum told her off, then said "That's not her Down's, she's just being a madam". It struck me as so sensible and such a good way to deal with someone without letting them get away with too much to their eventual detriment. Maybe someone just needs to say NO to H&M?

@Walkingbacktohappiness ’are they just knocking about their huge house with no real friends?’ Sadly, yes I think. Ok for a time, maybe. Harry must feel the loss of lifetime buddies & his bro keenly. Does he visit oldest friends & do they visit him. I thought M & H very close to Eugenie???

As I've said before on here, I occasionally look at Celebitchy to see what the SS is thinking and saying, and the stuff about Catherine in particular is utterly, utterly vile. Her cancer makes no difference to them - in fact, they taunt her and declare that she hasn't had cancer but has in fact been beaten black and blue by William on several occasions. Similarly with Camilla who is lambasted for being ugly and evil. (Disclaimer: I like Camilla and I think she's a nice-looking and very elegant woman). Justine should be thankful that critics of Meghan and Harry are reasonable people!

I wonder if Justine is aware of the stomach-churning ACTUAL hatred on the other side? There have been glimpses of it on MN in the past, but nothing like Celebitchy, which is very much a US site and anti-British and anti-monarchy (unless it's some other monarchy, oddly. They're OK with Spanish and Scandi royals 🙄).

I'm very much not a psychologist but as I understand it, NPD is usually rooted in a major childhood trauma in early childhood which threw the young child's secure attachments into disarray. E.g. a parent suddenly leaving, or getting very ill, a traumatic house move, etc.

People often think a narcissist thinks very well of themselves but actually what drives them is a deep sense of total insecurity at their core. To feel OK, they have to have the feeling that they're in control of everything, and that everyone is looking at or thinking about or looking after them.

This is what drives them to adopt the dysfunctional behaviour such as lovebombing, controlling, lying about themselves or exaggerating. It can cause them to be very impulsive and grandiose, to jump feet first into big projects or life changes without thinking properly about the consequences or whether it's the right thing for them.

The most interesting (and potentially abusive) thing about a narcissist, for me, is that they view life as a zero-sum game. They regard good things, like success, wealth, joy, happiness, as being finite resources and, if they deem someone in their circle has too much of the thing, they fear that they themselves will lose some of that thing. This is why a narcissist often seems to 'have someone in their sights', to bully or undermine a target in their circle. It's driven by a subconscious fear that the person in question has too much of something the narcissist desperately wants. Happiness, let's say. So they will try to undermine that person's happiness, out of the subconscious belief that this will make them, the narc, happier.

The narcissist needs to be the most beloved, the most admired, the most successful, the happiest. But they don't understand that certain things (like happiness) originate a large part from within. They think it's a resource which they can seize more of by taking away some of another person's happiness.

Narcs also tend to be very resentful and grudge-bearing.

It's actually a very miserable way to live.

According to the VF article, Harry has struggled to make friends in California. That doesn't surprise me. It's difficult to make friends in middle age at the best of times. But he is in a whole new country, in a neighbourhood which seems to consist of a collection of gated mansions rather than a real community. Very different from the tight aristocratic circles where he grew up, where everyone knew everyone. As for Meghan, she seems to think of 'friends' in transactional terms.

As for Harry's old friends, obviously this is all rumour but it seems he has dropped most of them. In any case, they are likely busy with families and jobs so even if they do visit, it can't be more than once a year or so. Same with Eugenie. I think their 'closeness' is exaggerated but she has two young boys and isn't going to be jetting back and forth across the Atlantic just to see Harry. And if push were to come to shove, she would choose her connections with the senior royals above Harry without hesitation.

I agree. I was thinking this the other day - who drops in to see them for coffee or lunch? I'm sure they'd want any visitor to be 'vetted' to the nth degree, or perhaps to sign a NDA? They have no local relations (or any relations at all , really, except for Doria). I wonder how they'll manage with the children's schooling - will they do playdates? Their lifestyle must be very weird indeed and as you say, they must be rattling around in that house. What's the point of all those bedrooms and bathrooms if no-one ever visits?

I know, I know - it's all speculation. But there's never any sense of low-key normality. Does Meghan ever actually entertain friends as she appears to in the show?

In some ways it's not how much the need to earn per year it's how much they need to invest each year to pay for theirs and their children's longevity. As William seems to be their yard stick they need over the half billion but ideally the billion mark to provide their annual income. They sort of did it the wrong way round. You need the wealth and then comes the philanthropy, hence their words of hand up rather than hand out. Hopefully they get over the competitive nature before their children repeat the same. Ideally I'd like them to have the success needed so they do not have to return to the kiss and tell but equally not to successful that they attempt their revenge on William and Catherine. Personally I do not think their financial status is what they need or they would have done damage control against the disaster tourists with a "leaked" very substantial cash donation to the fires or world kitchen.

I don't understand why it's not more popular in Western Europe

Ah, but wait @GiveMeSpanakopita - we have a bakery in our suburban village and it was taken over by a Greek guy!!!
Needless to say the entire village were soon hooked on portakalopita, only to find that a couple of years later he retired back to Greece shouldn't have been allowed

Believe me the grief was real, and not just for the wonderful guy he was ...

@Onlyonekenobe you nail it. Meghan won’t be comfortable with entry level ‘rich’ on St George’s Hill, Surrey, writ large. If as I suspect she wants to be the ‘bestest in the barn’ the not so subtle digs of other residents will surely grate…’We’re off to our fully staffed home in St Barths & on the boat for a bit first’…’Barbados? Or we still keep the old place there’. ..If that sort of winning & materialism defines you, long days as my teens would say.

‘Ah you are building near a golf course in the Algarve? How lovely, our Portuguese housekeeper is retiring to the same development, she saw a single storey unit there in a glossy, Jose’s handicap now in single figures..we’re given them a bit of a boost in a bonus’…taps nose…’so they fit in’.

And the old money Philanthropy types will likely sneer & Harry won’t be used to that & assume all round jealousy.

Ah, but Harry has something that no number of billions can buy. As Trump showing off his letter from KC3 showed. Colour me cynical but Meghan knows, each time people show wants to know reach to shake Harry's hand first, that she needs him desperately. He's still her only currency.